Why *(content warning: concerns domestic abuse)

[mcdreamymcsteamy]

I'm shaking writing this but I don't have anybody to talk to in real life. I have no family and I'm too ashamed to tell my friends. I have no where to go.

But I need to tell somebody.

Yesterday whilst holding my 12 week old baby he slapped me across the face. Then when I swore at him he put his hands around my neck and choked me until I sat down on the sofa.

Today he was holding the baby and I was sat in the comer of the sofa, he'd made a comment that I am insecure that's why I always wear black underwear?! I said he is a sick fuck for hitting me with a baby in my arms, he put the baby in the Moses basket and said I'll show hits then bang there was 3/4 hits across my head and a chunk of my hair on the floor! I tried to kick him then more fighting but it's a blur but somewhere in there he shouted at me that I'm fat as fuck and made nasty comments about my stretch marks and my arms.

What the actual fuck.

He is not here right now and im sitting plucking up the courage to ring the police.

Oh, OP this is not your fault. You don't need to be ashamed, he should be.
Please, call the police. You need to protect your baby and yourself. He is not a good father and your son needs to be protected from him.

It's great that you own the house- thats a great security. Can you afford to go somewhere else for a few days? Hotel, friends, etc?

But definitely police, they can help.

@mcdreamymcsteamy

Thank you everyone. I appreciate every single response, I have t cried or anything I feel shell shocked. Why do I allow myself to be treat like this im a good person

You haven't allowed anything. His behaviour is his to explain. Good luck OP.

Stop thinking about why and start protecting you and your little one. They only have you to depend on.

Oh my God! This is shocking! If you don't take actions this will end up very bad. He is a monster

How terrifying for you and your baby. As everyone says, call the police on 999 and let them advise you on next steps. It sounds like you need to get checked out at the hospital too, so you could go straight to A&E and report from there.

@Christmasfairy2020

People saying call the police you need to tell her how. 111 or 999

111 is NHS non emergency number...

Im sure she knows how to contact the police.

Please phone the police OP

Call the police, do not think twice about it….

You have to ring the police. You need to protect yourself and your beautiful baby. Put you both first and go. It will be hard, but in the long run your life will be so much happier and you will be safe.

We are all here for you OP

XX

Just checking in to see how you are and if you've managed to call yet. I hope your sister is with you now

Please call the police. You deserve better.

The police will be able to find you somewhere to stay through a women's refuge service. Call now, if you haven't done so already.
Grab some nappies and baby grows and formula if not bf to get you through a hours, leave everything else and just go with the police.
He's betting you won't do this. Show him how strong you really are

God please call the police, don’t let your child be brought up in this. One day he will kill you. Do if for your child if you can’t do it for you.

The more time you sit thinking about it the more likely you'll end up talking yourself out of calling them. A man who will beat you as you're holding a newborn will almost definitely go on to be violent to your child at some point. You need to act, now

If you are asking why, you are still open to there being a rational explanation for this. There isn't one. Forget trying to work out the reasoning - it would make sense to abusers but it will never make sense to you.

Just get yourself out, and start spending time with people whose behaviour doesn't leave you asking 'Why?'.

OP I hope your sister is with you and you've phoned the police.

I'm glad you are calling the police. I never did and went through 12 years of it. You need to keep him away.

So glad your sister is near, please go call the police and get this man ( piece of shit) out of your and your baby’s life.

He'll start going for your child soon. Please, please get away from him.

Hope you called the police, please leave no matter what it takes. You really do deserve so much more & there’s no price for peace of mind. He doesn’t deserve you, he needs putting away. Good luck ❤️ xx

Jesus Christ what a callous, evil bastard.

Please don't change your mind about ringing the police OP, he could end up killing your child and you.

Phone the police xx

OP I fear for you, I really do, and for your baby. Please try to make sure you're never alone with this man again.

It's good that you have your own house, except that also means he knows where to find you. Change the locks asap, and get advice from a domestic violence charity on how to keep yourself safe. Can your sister or a friend stay with you for a bit?

Tell the police everything; maybe they can get you some sort of alarm in case he tries to get to you.

I'm so sorry you face this situation. And it's not your fault.

When a man puts hands around the neck it increases the risk of homicide sevenfold.

That means that now he has choked you, he is seven times more likely to kill you.

He is very dangerous and you need to call the police ASAP.

I hope you've rung the police now and are safe