Strange unannounced visit

[santamarga]

Can I ask what you would have done or would do in this situation?

I dropped in unannounced into my husband's place of work (he owns it) with our children as we were in the area and thought it might be nice to pop in. Everything was nice, children having a chat with their dad, and a couple of male colleagues.

Suddenly this woman comes in, strides basically between where we were all standing chatting, and plonks her bag and some papers on DH's desk. The conversation between us all stopped, as I was looking at the woman, waiting for someone to speak.

It suddenly felt really awkward, DH said nothing, just stood there, and the woman was kind of waiting at the desk, as if she had an appointment and just assumed me and the children were customers so was waiting for us to finish.

One of the colleagues said to her something like 'it's a family conference here' in a jokey kind of way.

She then looks up, never once looked at me, looked the children up and down, and asked DS how old he was! When he replied she said 'oh, that's interesting'.

Then she picks up her bag and said something, I don't know what, and proceeds to walk out. It just felt so awkward, and DH said nothing during this.

Apparently she was a rep who had called in unannounced.

Would you have concerns about this?

What concerns? She sounds socially awkward tbh.

Not about her, tbh.
She was probably a bit "wtaf" about a wife taking the kids into her colleague's workplace.

What did he say to you afterwards?

Yeah, that's strange. The leaving is what stands out for me.

I don’t know OP. That totally smacks of someone he was once shagging… and maybe around the time DS was born. Or she’s a complete nutter but I think that’s why you’re asking. Has your DH got form for this? Have you ever suspected?

Strange behaviour from the female. Nothing strange about you popping in with the kids to see your husband!

As Capricorn says, I would be thinking the same unfortunately

Maybe she had to hurry off do do something. And as pp said, wasn't too keen on kids in the workplace.

Where was the awkwardness coming from? Just the silence or were the guys visibly uncomfortable?

Maybe she fancies your hubby but theres nothing going on. Does your husband have form for cheating?

Hmmm.

Your gut is telling you that something is off so I'd trust that tbh

There is nothing wrong with you popping into the workplace, presumably you've done this before and it's not a problem. But, asking ds his age and the subsequent comment ? Really strange.

And even if she were a rep, not only was she rude, but really unprofessional.

She was definitely rude and unprofessional as already said. Your DH was also strange though. He just stood there and said nothing at all? That is so odd.

I find it odd that your DH didn't say anything ... surely as a business owner he would say 'good morning name, I'll be with you in ten minutes, why not grab yourself a coffee' ... or similar, the fact that he said nothing is very strange, is he socially awkward or covering something up ?

My DH has his own business, he would just introduce me to whoever it was and make it a three way conversation .

And what does dh say about this?

-I would assume they’d slept together at some point.

In fact I would go further and assume that they’d slept together and she had no idea that he was married, and that maybe you were pregnant at the time.

Absolutely I would have major concerns! That is so weird and also one the staff trying to say something to make it less awkward, like he knew.

I'm not sure what kind of work place it is, but would it be weird for someone to put their stuff on your DH's desk? I can't really imagine doing that tbh. And a rep is usually polite and trying to win a client over.

It is strange that your DH hasn't said anything. It requires explanation. Have you asked him who is she?

Sounds like he's been doing he dirty with her to me. People don't behave like that, even socially awkward people...

Yes, I would assume that he is having/had an affair with the woman.
And the colleagues obviously know about it too as they stepped in to tell her that you’re his family before she could say something incriminating.

Very odd.

What is the relevance of your DS age - has she had an affair with him?

Why was your husband stood there saying nothing! That's really odd.

@MaMaD1990

Sounds like he's been doing he dirty with her to me. People don't behave like that, even socially awkward people...

That's my first thought. No wonder he said nothing and she was grumpy.

Ignoring everything else, the pertinent bit is asking how old your DS is, when presumably she didn't ask the ages of the other children?

It's not an unusual question to ask a child, I guess, when you're trying to be nice and make conversation. But the question would normally come up during a conversation involving the parents as well, so the fact that this was the first and pretty much only thing she said? That's very pertinent, and I think you should be interested in learning why she was interested in learning this one particular child's age.

Her response would suggest that his date of birth is significant to her in some way.

what did your husband say about it ?

@Amdone123

And even if she were a rep, not only was she rude, but really unprofessional.

A rep that has had sex with the business owner might act this way though.

What you all jist stood there ans said nothing and the only person to speak was her and the family conf guy.?

I assume you think he’s shagging her.?