Men + unrealistic expectations OLD

[Kitchentop]

The men I’ve dated from the online world seem to have very unrealistic expectations - young, skinny, ‘feminine’ women etc even though they’ve been absolutely nothing special themselves whatsoever. I guess it’s entitlement?
It seems to be worse in London where I am based. I am originally from outside of the big city and in my hometown men seem to be more realistic and very happy with normal women - not size 8-10 etc
Just wondering is this a London and online dating phenomena?

I’m 5ft8 in bare feet but wear heels all the time, Ive dated short guys, I just don’t get why it’s an issue for some women, or men

Who cares about height?

I do. Small feet give me the creeps.

@Kitchentop size 8-10 is perfectly normal. UK has a huge overweight/obesity problem which is skewing your perception of women's sizes. A great deal of women are overweight and should actually be focusing on reducing their own weight for the sake of their own health instead of envying smaller women.

Surely it's just a preference either implicit or explicit.
Whatever men or women prefer online is irrelevant, you'll match with and date people you connect with and in general on a comparative level.

Personally, mine was size ten, universally pretty or modelesque looks, and a bold personality with family values.
That's what I'm marrying.

The point is, a lot of mens preference is someone who will have rough sex, anal and choking.

@DrSbaitso

I have heard that short men get a lot of abuse on OLD.

It may be because so many short men on OLD lie about their true height to deceive women into dates. Which is so entitled and sexist. Of course if they're honest about their heights, them receiving abuse is horrible.

@MorriseysGladioli

The point is, a lot of mens preference is someone who will have rough sex, anal and choking.

As a female I’m not against any of those things per se, but I am against guys expecting it on a first meet, often with no expectation of meeting ever again

I'm not against those things either.
I'm just thankful I'm so far off the scale of desirability that nobody will ever want me to accommodate them.

@MorriseysGladioli

The point is, a lot of mens preference is someone who will have rough sex, anal and choking.

I think for an online conversation or an initial meet that's not a good intro. A female and I spent ages laughing at some of the inane messages she used to be sent on an hourly basis. Be it of an explicit nature or just a general bore fest, with some stalkerish traits thrown in for good measure.

The sexual side tends to evolve naturally via consent later on.

A female and I spent ages laughing at some of the inane messages she used to be sent on an hourly basis

A female??

What are you? The Ferengi?

That's what I'm marrying.

That's what you're marrying.

Jesus, does this lucky woman know what appalling dehumanising language you use to talk about her?

@FuckItAllOffRightNow

That's what I'm marrying.

That's what you're marrying.

Jesus, does this lucky woman know what appalling dehumanising language you use to talk about her?

Lol, I think you’re being a bit over sensitive here to be fair to him

@DrSbaitso

I have heard that short men get a lot of abuse on OLD.

I don't think its so much that they get abuse. At least not in the way women get abuse for not being slim or pretty. They generally get ignored or rejected. Which isn't the same thing...

@FuckItAllOffRightNow

That's what I'm marrying.

That's what you're marrying.

Jesus, does this lucky woman know what appalling dehumanising language you use to talk about her?

She can't be dehumanised. She doesn't exist. Not this size 10 supermodel fiancee, nor the "female" with whom he totally had a conversation about BDSM with all his knowledge and experience.

It's just another boring and transparent wind up. I wish they'd come up with something new. There's only so many times I can get nostalgic for 2005.

Ah ok. Haven't read all his comments. Fair enough.

@FuckItAllOffRightNow

Ah ok. Haven't read all his comments. Fair enough.

You don't need to. It was obvious from the "I'm marrying a size 10 supermodel who can't wait to have my babies and that's why I'm on the Relationships board of Mumsnet" post.

Obviously, when that fell flat, he also became a mega Dom who discusses BDSM with women who can see he's totally a cut above.

I wonder if the supermodel babymaking fiancee is also Asian. That was very much the formula for a while; they all liked fetishising Asian women. I knew one once who could never keep track of whether he'd married her or not.

@Hrpuffnstuff1

Surely it's just a preference either implicit or explicit. Whatever men or women prefer online is irrelevant, you'll match with and date people you connect with and in general on a comparative level.

Personally, mine was size ten, universally pretty or modelesque looks, and a bold personality with family values.
That's what I'm marrying.

Chances are, the woman you are marrying won't be size 10 for ever. Just as you will inevitably get older too. Same with the model-type looks.

If by "family values" you mean she wants to have children with you, then she'll almost certainly not remain size 10 when pregnant and more than likely won't go back to that afterwards. (Unless she does a lot of sport.)

You talk as if you have just bought an item off a supermarket shelf.

Honestly there are a tonne of women out there that say they are into choking, anal and all about the porn style sex life. However scratch the surface and what they usually really want is genuine connection and intimacy.

@FuckItAllOffRightNow

A female and I spent ages laughing at some of the inane messages she used to be sent on an hourly basis

A female??

What are you? The Ferengi?

Oops meant to say, female friend.

You don't need to. It was obvious from the "I'm marrying a size 10 supermodel who can't wait to have my babies and that's why I'm on the Relationships board of Mumsnet" post.

'Obviously, when that fell flat, he also became a mega Dom who discusses BDSM with women who can see he's totally a cut above.

I wonder if the supermodel babymaking fiancee is also Asian. That was very much the formula for a while; they all liked fetishizing Asian women. I knew one once who could never keep track of whether he'd married her or not.

If you were a detective, you'd give Inspector Clouseau a run for his money, your posts are quite funny. Have you by any chance been turned down by a bald midget?

I never mentioned BDSM, no she's not Asian, I never mentioned babies either. I said family values, nor did I mention supermodel.
I met her on Bumble. So yes the experience is much like a supermarket. And she's Russian, quite a contrast in values are observed.

Have you by any chance been turned down by a bald midget?

Are you hitting on me?

As a side note...I'm killing myself here. Russian was the other one, after Asian. One of them, back in the day, called his "Russian Rose". She was 25 in 2005, and again in 2008.

The theme is basically an exotic nationality in which women are perceived to be so much softer and more pleasing ("family minded" or whatever) and therefore British/white western women need to watch out as their supply of, er, men will swiftly disappear if they don't bloody well STOP BEING SO HORRIBLE WHINE WHINE WHINE.

As you can see from the existence and dominant culture of Mumsnet, it totally terrified us into submission.

U ok Hun 🤣

I haven't a hope. I'm tall, size 16, job/house/car etc

Load up profile and it's "size 6-8, must have good job over 50k, no older than 30, no baggage, brunette preferred, enjoy be open to threesome/open relationship... other ridiculous list of demands"
Then I look at his profile and he's 55 with a beer belly and looks like he belongs on crimewatch

Then my dad asks why I'm single. Well...