Hello old friends and new friends,
I'm still in the midst of separating from H, and doing lots of reading online about divorce finance, advice and law. I accidentally came across something that actually named my relationship, or named the type of relationship it was. It really helped so much, because what my H and I had was a 'thing', it had a name.
So just in case it's of any help to you amazing ladies, I have been living with what's known as a 'covert naricissist' and I am a 'codependent'.
To give you a brief rundown of a 'covert narcissist':-
-They’re not really listening; they’re waiting to talk about themselves.
-They want to control you
-They behave vulnerable, hypersensitive, anxious and displays a lack of confidence, and may seem introverted, they will use this pretend vulnerability to exploit others.
-They will evoke your empathy and pity, they will play the victim.
-They cross boundaries, like taking things without asking, after you've told them to please not do something, they will continue to do it.
-They need you to praise them and appreciate all the time, it feels like they are sucking you dry.
I hope this is not your other half, but if it is, it's bad, and there is nothing you can do. They need professional help.
I have grieved and cried so much. I have been angry.
I'm keeping a journal, each day, my thoughts, my feelings, my struggle.
Now I'm only moving forward, focused now on myself and my sense of self-worth. I'm going to fix myself, because no one can do it for me.
I wish all of you the best and send strength to you all.