Dating Thread 205 - dusting off the gladrags

[Dancerinthemoonlight]

The Rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. Know your worth.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future 14. OLD can get very time consuming. Keep doing other activities you enjoy.

Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item

@VanGoghsDog that's what he said anyway.

He's 34.

I do wonder about it now, because he said that he had been chatting to the OW about the time he was chatting with me, so maybe he'd been out with her and didn't want to go out with me?

@WeWantTheFinestWines @VanGoghsDog I feel a bit stupid now.

Ah @OnwardsEverStridingOnwards I’m sad reading what’s been going on with you - crappy worm, he just wasn’t the One sweetie, don’t let him come crawling back will you? You’ll find someone who treats you like a princess as you deserve. Sending hugs xx

@Shayelle2009

Ah *@OnwardsEverStridingOnwards* I’m sad reading what’s been going on with you - crappy worm, he just wasn’t the One sweetie, don’t let him come crawling back will you? You’ll find someone who treats you like a princess as you deserve. Sending hugs xx

Thank you @Shayelle. ❤️ I have blocked him on WhatsApp and my phone so he can't contact me anymore.

I feel bad for hijacking the thread, but posting on here has really helped today.

Sending you hugs back 🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗

No way!! Don't feel bad. And I can guarantee there is not one of us on here who’s not gone through these horrible incidents and the feelings afterwards... you will be ok and you’ll brighter in a day or two - you’re resilient and sparkly, he wasn't nice enough for you. X

@Shayelle2009

No way!! Don't feel bad. And I can guarantee there is not one of us on here who’s not gone through these horrible incidents and the feelings afterwards... you will be ok and you’ll brighter in a day or two - you’re resilient and sparkly, he wasn't nice enough for you. X

@Shayelle2009 ❤️❤️❤️

[quote OnwardsEverStridingOnwards]**@WeWantTheFinestWines* @VanGoghsDog* I feel a bit stupid now. [/quote]
Nooooo......you're a genuine person who takes people at face value.

What you don't want to be is an old cynic like me!

I expect he was just timing things and meeting her just happened first. But that is a bit of the problem with OLD. What he did wrong was to make you feel you were the only one and to delay your meet under false pretences.

@VanGoghsDog thanks. I feel a bit better hearing that ❤️

[quote OnwardsEverStridingOnwards]**@WeWantTheFinestWines* @VanGoghsDog* I feel a bit stupid now. [/quote]
It's so easy to fall into the trap of feeling stupid when we've been lied to. The problem is that if someone wants to bend the truth or blatantly lie, there is no way of spotting it, especially if it's someone you haven't known for long, and you're not face to face. And if we start going down the road of never believing anyone ever, our lives will be poorer for it. Being on the receiving end of a convenient fib is an occupational hazard, but it doesn't make you stupid.

@WeWantTheFinestWines 👍🏻

Onwards it’s really awful how he went about things. And i think there are few of us that have not felt that ‘I’m stupid for falling for his crap’ feeling. Hopefully after a good sleep tonight things will look brighter tomorrow. You are a lovely kind person, that comes across here all the time, you deserve better.

@Mayzee

Onwards it’s really awful how he went about things. And i think there are few of us that have not felt that ‘I’m stupid for falling for his crap’ feeling. Hopefully after a good sleep tonight things will look brighter tomorrow. You are a lovely kind person, that comes across here all the time, you deserve better.

@Mayzee thank you ❤️

Hope you’re ok this morning @OnwardsEverStridingOnwards xx

Sorry to read your update too @OnwardsEverStridingOnwards I wasn't expecting it but was getting concerned that you hadn't met yet, just because you can get on so well with someone over message and it isn't the same in person.
Dust yourself off and take a little time to lick your wounds. As others have said, time is on your side in terms of marriage and family

Although my situation with Mr O is very different to onwards there's some really good general advice that I'll be taking on board to move forward with.
Whilst I am and always will be honest, I think I can be a little too forthcoming with information and it leaves me vulnerable. I think I need to keep my cards closer to my chest.

@OnwardsEverStridingOnwards sorry for your update. Try not to catastrophise this and make it seem like it's all on you. I found it strange how he just blocked you, that always makes me think how childish someone can be. Take some time for yourself.

@SortingItOut @Clovertoast i think after 2 years together, you should have easily met someone from your partner's lives even if a few close friends. I would be very wary in this situation. @clovertoast there's something fishy going on when he hides you from plain site because of his ex, are they definitely over/done and dusted? You've always seemed lovely and it really sounds like he is taking advantage of your good nature

Just catching up on the thread

@OnwardsEverStridingOnwards I'm so sorry about your shocking news of Mr Bookworm! I have been a victim so many times of men who pay compliments and future fake only to be snubbed in the next breath. My best advice is to try to remember it's not about you, it's about them, everyone is out for themselves in this life (some more than others!) so please try not to doubt yourself. Feeling very glum is a perfectly natural response, but try not to let it take over you too much for too long, you've always seemed lovely on here and it's horrible to think of you being so down about it 💐

@Dan88Bourne I'm not on hinge but would take a look at screen shots if you like - I'm just a teeny bit older than you

Wish me luck gang! I started chatting to Mr Easy Saturday night, great convo, he suggested coffee before he goes away for two weeks, we're meeting today! He's 50 miles away but coming this way so we can meet on the coast. Which is sheer madness on a sunny bank holiday... but it would be a lovely place for a walk. So I'm nervous and excited and have no idea what to wear 😱

Hope you're feeling better today onwards and that everyone is enjoying the sunshine.

@Eesha I totally agree, I'm not making excuses but the first 9 months of our relationship we were FWB plus we were then in lockdown, I know his family took it very seriously but now we are nearly out of any form of lockdown I think giving him a few months will suffice.
It is definitely trickier when we don't have weekends together as weekday evenings can be busy for us too.

I've ordered the Mr Unavailable book, will be interesting as I thought/think I am Mrs Unavailable.

@frankiefirstyear

Just catching up on the thread

@OnwardsEverStridingOnwards I'm so sorry about your shocking news of Mr Bookworm! I have been a victim so many times of men who pay compliments and future fake only to be snubbed in the next breath. My best advice is to try to remember it's not about you, it's about them, everyone is out for themselves in this life (some more than others!) so please try not to doubt yourself. Feeling very glum is a perfectly natural response, but try not to let it take over you too much for too long, you've always seemed lovely on here and it's horrible to think of you being so down about it 💐

@Dan88Bourne I'm not on hinge but would take a look at screen shots if you like - I'm just a teeny bit older than you

@frankiefirstyear ❤️

[quote Eesha]@OnwardsEverStridingOnwards sorry for your update. Try not to catastrophise this and make it seem like it's all on you. I found it strange how he just blocked you, that always makes me think how childish someone can be. Take some time for yourself.[/quote]
@Eesha I know. I found the fact that he'd blocked me really out of order.

I mean, I know I ended the video call early, but surely he would have understood that I needed time to think?

I will do, thank you

@Heartbeats0708

Sorry to read your update too *@OnwardsEverStridingOnwards* I wasn't expecting it but was getting concerned that you hadn't met yet, just because you can get on so well with someone over message and it isn't the same in person. Dust yourself off and take a little time to lick your wounds. As others have said, time is on your side in terms of marriage and family

@Heartbeats0708 ❤️

@Shayelle2009

Hope you’re ok this morning *@OnwardsEverStridingOnwards* xx

Thank you @Shayelle. I'm Feeling much better today 😘😘

@WeWantTheFinestWines

Wish me luck gang! I started chatting to Mr Easy Saturday night, great convo, he suggested coffee before he goes away for two weeks, we're meeting today! He's 50 miles away but coming this way so we can meet on the coast. Which is sheer madness on a sunny bank holiday... but it would be a lovely place for a walk. So I'm nervous and excited and have no idea what to wear 😱

Hope you're feeling better today onwards and that everyone is enjoying the sunshine.

Good luck, @WeWantTheFinestWines. Really happy for you. ❤️

I'm Feeling much better today, happily 🙂