Dp still sulking over conspiracy

[Abbeywell79]

I had a thread on here yesterday which got pulled as it appeared some conspiracy nut jobs took it over and I was concerned dp might come across it.

There were so many helpful posters on there who I tried to say thank you to before it got pulled but ran out of time. I just wanted to say it here because that thread really got me through a very tough day.

As an update, well not much to report. He’s still not home so I relented and sent him a message last night saying the children miss you perhaps you could let us know your plans. He replied saying he hasn’t had much sleep (my heart bleeds) and he would be in touch tomorrow (how kind).

I never again want to see the disappointed look on my children’s faces when they realised daddy wasn’t home. If he so much as tries the woe is me card today I will tell him to grow the fuck up and get back home and deal with his responsibilities.

This probably doesn’t make much sense to anyone but needed to put something down.

Thank you for the update Op. It such a dreadfully sad situation you find yourself even albeit scary too. You are doing so well despite your life in turmoil. You are doing the best you can by letting your children have supervised access so they at least have some contact. As for the future? If he still is in this deep now and just wants to keep his beliefs to himself, well, you said it yourself, it really isn't sustainable. I hope he gets further treatment for his MH and we are all crossing our fingers that he sees the light one day when non of his predictions come true. Wishing you all the best OP.

What a horrendous situation OP, I feel for you.

I think though that there is only so far you can go with trying to reason with him. If he is mentally unwell then I am not sure that setting a timeframe will work, because he simply isn't in a place to think rationally. So just be prepared for that.

What a sad situation. @Abbeywell79 you might find some insight and solace in reading accounts of people whose partners suddenly ‘got religion’ or were radicalised into fringe/extreme religious sects. Or accounts of people who experienced that and eventually realised it was bollocks/ escaped from that community. There are books/articles written by the latter which might be useful for your husband to read, if he could do so with an open mind.

You're in such a difficult situation, but you have done completely the right thing in realising this relationship is over. I agree with PP that asking for a timescale is probably not going to do anything useful - people with your partner's sorts of beliefs tend to rationalise thing when their deadline passes and nothing happens, and then just pick a new deadline to latch on to. You just have to look at the Q cult and the 'Return Of Donald Trump' to see that this is how they think.

Unless your partner can be 'deprogrammed' and recover his mental health, you will always have to be very wary about what he is instilling in his DC.

@Alcemeg Thank you for that. I appreciate your response.

@Abbeywell79 I still think professional help is needed here. Particularly if your splitting up. That is likely to make his state of mind worse obviously.

One thing I do know about these types is that the end point keeps changing.

The reason being that the Q wankers in their groups keep changing the story to keep their acolytes hooked. So it used to be some day in Feb or March (can't remember), then when nothing happened it was changed to some date in May.

It'll just be kicked down the road a bit now, and then again and again. I believe the endgame is called The Storm.

You should go over to r/QAnonCasualties on Reddit. Some heartbreaking stories there. All very similar to yours.

www.reddit.com/r/QAnonCasualties/

You can filter by the best posts of the past month or year or whatever, or search within the sub by keyword.

after which if (or rather when) none of his predictions come to fruition he has to accept it was all a load of nonsense.
As @ElspethFlashman says, this day never comes. No cult survives if it is willing to say 'oh well fair play, the prediction didn't come true so it turns out it was all a con'. The con just evolves.

There are some stories here about de-radicalisation of QAnon victims. I fear the relative may be trying to help in a very complex area of mental health and your DP needs to seek specialist help, if he can persuaded that he has been brainwashed.

I suppose the big issue is that if these delusions are being caused by an underlying mental illness, then it isn't the delusion that needs to be resolved/treated but the illness. OP's husband has said he is very depressed, perhaps treatment for that will also help with his extreme conspiracy belief.

OP, do you think he might have been manic while he was away from your home and sending those texts, and has now crashed, like you see in bipolar behaviour?

I hope you're okay. Remember to reach out to people for your own support. This is a lot to shoulder.

SO glad you posted. I hope that his mental health is being give plenty of fresh air and daylight I.e his GP and wider circle of family/friends are aware?

I thought of this thread today. Hope all is going well, op @Abbeywell79