Partner wont put me on mortgage

[Mynewusername1]

Would you expect your partner to put your name on the mortgage if you were in a long term relationship?
oh says its his money as hes worked hard he has a degree etc and saved up deposit
I work but only earn min wage not educated but pay towards bills food & holidays etc...

No not if you've not contributed to the mortgage or deposit in anyway. Helping with bills and holidays is normal when you live there doesn't entitle you to half his house! Sorry

Sorry just read more than the original post. You have dc together and he said you wanted them ffs that implies he didn't. Ignore my previous post the fact that you have primary aged children together changes things. He sounds like. Nasty piece of selfish work tbh

just as an aside, childcare is a bill like all others, and should be shared proportionately, as should all bills.

so stop paying 50-50 if thats what you are doing. sort out childcare. increase your hours. and include childcare in household bills, which you will pay as a proportion of your wages compared to his. Ignore complaints that he has to pay all the mortgage, so you should be paying half - thats HIS CHOICE - you would be happy, no doubt, to pay your proportion of the mortgage if you were on the deeds.

and take a little look at what your maintanance payments would be, because I believe that they are included by banks should you wish to try to get a mortgage of your own.

How are you OP

I wouldn't become financially dependent on a man who won't marry me. Once you are married you will automatically have some rights to the home you live in. Right now, you are contributing towards the home by paying bills, but you have no security.

@oakleaffy

No way on earth would I want anyone being on the mortgage! Absolutely NOPE.

Having seen family members go through divorce, no way would I advise anyone to put a partner on the mortgage.

Sounds selfish, but when you have lost a proportion of a house to someone, you don't want to go there again.

Buy your own place!

Did you read the bit where they have children so are supposedly a family?

@clpsmum

No not if you've not contributed to the mortgage or deposit in anyway. Helping with bills and holidays is normal when you live there doesn't entitle you to half his house! Sorry

You didn’t read the thread, did you? Try again.......

My partner and I both own our own places. If he didn't and wanted me to put him on mine, unmarried and without children, I would be shocked. No way would I do it. That's madness , imo. he is protecting everything he has worked for and rightly so.

@Mynewusername1

Would you expect your partner to put your name on the mortgage if you were in a long term relationship? oh says its his money as hes worked hard he has a degree etc and saved up deposit I work but only earn min wage not educated but pay towards bills food & holidays etc...

@Mynewusername1 No I absolutely wouldn't unless I was married to them. If you're on the mortgage/deeds that's going to have permanent consequences for him when you're just boyfriend/girlfriend and when you split up too. You're expecting the sort of commitment that comes with marriage but you've moved in with someone who hasnt even proposed to you yet why did you move in with him? Move straight out.

If he doesn't want to get married or is delaying proposal just leave him. You're letting him have his cake and eat it when he can dump you and drive you out of his house without consequences at any point. I simply don't understand why women just let men walk.all over them and have everything their way like this.

I answer to the original question, I would never put my parters name on my mortgage.

You are in the difficult position of 'wife' (running his home, helping with the bills, having his children) but without legal protection. He holds all the cards now and I doubt he will ever marry you.

It's shit and I hate writing that, but in this regard women are much less protected than in the past when women usually were married before having children and living with a guy. We are a long way away from equity which seem that it will only be achieved when women earn the same as men and don't give up careers while raising children

@Windmillwhirl

My partner and I both own our own places. If he didn't and wanted me to put him on mine, unmarried and without children, I would be shocked. No way would I do it. That's madness , imo. he is protecting everything he has worked for and rightly so.

Rtft, they have kids and he bought while they were IN a relationship, and has already kicked op and the kids out once!

My partner tried to do the same to me as it was his inheritance for the mortgage.

I said I would pay towards food and a small amount towards utility. I said £300 a month. That's it.
There is no way I would pay towards council tax, repairs, home improvements on a house I dont own and he could turf me out of whenever he liked.

Just read your replies.

I think its disgusting you have been together 17 years with children and he wont marry you or put you on the mortgage.

Hes kicked you out before and your children with nothing.

I would be giving him an ultimatum..marriage or mortgage or I'm gone for good.

Wouldn’t want to be on the bloody mortgage or even near him considering he kicked you and his own children out the house.

What do you see in this vile man?