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Original poster

Sex 'I've had better'

166 replies

Bellapinkfis · 01/02/2021 11:55

I am writing on here as i don't have anyone i wish to talk to about this but would hugely appreciate some advice.

My partner and I have been together a year - no children of our own - he was two .

He cooks , cleans, hoovers , is generous, is fun and is supportive . We have great sex BUT he wants sex each day and I don't. For an easy life i gave him sex almost each day but in the past he has said -
I always approach you
Sometimes you just lie there

I explained - i want sex 3/4 times a week and if this was the case i would be alot more up for it and initate .I often 'lie there' as i don;t want the sex and i feel frustrated. This has caused a few heated arguments.

Last week we had a huge row and he said 'i was boring in bed and then some other stupid comments. Anyway, he agreed to less but better sex . a week goes by, I dont want sex on Sunday night - I can feel him trying it in the bed - i gnore him and he flips out. He says i gave him the signals ! He then says people who are happy and this early on should have sex each day because they want too. He then said some rude comments, swore and was shouting at me about sex saying i havne't had a mature sexual relationship et

I turned around and said - I have had much better sex with other people. He went mental and said he doesn't want to be with me , os moving out, i am a slag etc!!!

I am shocked - immature i know but i think - he should know what it feels like to have nasty comments made. He has said vile things to me and said my sex was boring. His ego is bruised so now he is upset!!

When i was listening to him last night , i thought - i don't need this bollocks. Or am i just shutting the door on something great and we just need to get through this blip?

Is it common for people to argue about sex? Especaiilly after the honeymooon phase? Am i odd for not wanting sex each day ? I have never had an issue with a previous partner and having sex 4/5 times a week

I don't know ?
Please advise

OP posts:
Silenceisgolden20 · 01/02/2021 11:57

Get rid of him. He's being coercive and abusive

Katiekins8 · 01/02/2021 11:57

Two words - get rid

Your life will be a misery with this man.

Silenceisgolden20 · 01/02/2021 11:58

If I was you I wouldn't care that I had told him that after the way he has treated you.

This will only get worse. He will increase with his demands

o8O8O8o · 01/02/2021 11:59

The trash has taken itself out 🗑️
Bye-bye trash🌬️
Job done ✔️

alltheadrenalin · 01/02/2021 11:59

Surprised you've not snapped back before. You're well rid

Quartz2208 · 01/02/2021 12:00

You are having sex you dont want - let him go

Thisendsnow · 01/02/2021 12:00

You already know the answer to this.
Life is too short to put up with bullshit and I'm sure you'll have a much better sex life without him, even if that's with Ann summers in the interim.

MissBPotter · 01/02/2021 12:01

You sound incompatible and he sounds horrible actually. I think you should kick him out and next time remember you are worth more than a man who treats you like a sex doll.

yetmorenamechanging · 01/02/2021 12:04

Sometimes you just lie there

And what, he notices you "just lying there" and continues?!

There's nothing good about what he's saying. You deserve a lot better.

And FYI in future, you don't ever need to accept sex to keep a man happy. Ever. If you're not sexually matched, you're not sexually matched. No man deserves sex (or woman for that matter).

Prettybubblesintheair · 01/02/2021 12:06

Nope get rid. He’s bullying you into having sex and no in my experience it isn’t normal to argue about sex this early on in a relationship. What you said wasn’t nice but you were reacting to the horrible crap he’s said to you so I don’t blame you at all. You aren’t compatible at all, I’d end it if I were you.

CaraDuneRedux · 01/02/2021 12:06

LTB!

He sounds horrible. Life is too short to waste on a horrible man.

Mamagotskills · 01/02/2021 12:07

Sounds like a shit relationship, move on

CuriousaboutSamphire · 01/02/2021 12:09

Hold the door open for him; help him pack!

He has not hidden who he is, how he thinks of you, your body!

You will be well rid of him!

clopper · 01/02/2021 12:09

o80808o
The trash has taken itself out 🗑️
Bye-bye trash🌬️
Job done ✔️

This ^ completely

angelaEhen · 01/02/2021 12:10

He doesn't care about your feelings only about what he can get. Leave him

pdiddydid · 01/02/2021 12:12

Coercive sex. He's absolutely horrible op, don't get back together with whatever you do.

Silenceisgolden20 · 01/02/2021 12:13

You need to retitle this thread as my boyfriend is an entitled sex pest wanker.

Littlefluffyclouds13 · 01/02/2021 12:14

If I 'just laid there' while my dh had sex with me, he would immediately stop, check I was ok and check I wanted to carry on.

This man is beyond vile. He's only interested in his pleasure, please run for the hills op Thanks

Goodbye2020Hello2021 · 01/02/2021 12:14

Disgusting man.
You don’t need some horrible oaf pawing at you every night.
Let him go and tell him not to come back.

LizFlowers · 01/02/2021 12:14

@Katiekins8

Two words - get rid

Your life will be a misery with this man.

Yep.
GreatExpectationalized · 01/02/2021 12:17

By your description, he is immature, disrespectful, and abusive.

Do those things sound appealing to you long term?

TheVanguardSix · 01/02/2021 12:18

I can't imagine him being compatible with ANYONE.
If it's of any consolation OP, in my days of having a sex drive that could break the sound barrier (many moons ago! Grin), I would have found him horrendous. He's a scumbag. You are so well rid of him.

gaijinetal · 01/02/2021 12:21

I doubt there are many women who want sex every day (after the initial lust/honeymoon bit) ... There may be some but i doubt they're in the majority.

So he's going to just keep bouncing around different relationships.

Everyone will say you're not compatible but not many women would be compatible with him.

Plus he sounds coercive, sexually.

Hs also sounds nasty about it

You only said what you said in response to being attached verbally by him.

How ironic that you're being criticised for not wanting sex all the time but when you crack and say something back about his technique/the sex; you're a slut lol.

What, a slut he had to coerce into sex and who's "boring"

Silenceisgolden20 · 01/02/2021 12:24

Yeah he's kinda shown when an abusive prick he is by one min you're boring and the next you're a slut.

Misogyny at it's finest there. Purely text book tactics to erode your self esteem.
Tell him to f off

GreatExpectationalized · 01/02/2021 12:26

@gaijinetal

I doubt there are many women who want sex every day (after the initial lust/honeymoon bit) ... There may be some but i doubt they're in the majority.

So he's going to just keep bouncing around different relationships.

Everyone will say you're not compatible but not many women would be compatible with him.

Plus he sounds coercive, sexually.

Hs also sounds nasty about it

You only said what you said in response to being attached verbally by him.

How ironic that you're being criticised for not wanting sex all the time but when you crack and say something back about his technique/the sex; you're a slut lol.

What, a slut he had to coerce into sex and who's "boring"

Last line made me LOL!