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Original poster

I think there’s another phone

367 replies

Dissillusioned · 08/01/2021 09:56

I may be paranoid but a couple of things lately have me thinking dp may have a secret phone.
I’ve looked but can’t find one, so I could be totally wrong but my gut is telling me to keep looking.
What I’m asking is, those that have found a secret phone, where was it hidden? I’m hoping there’s places I haven’t thought to look. I’m also hoping I’m wrong and just paranoid as I do have form for overthinking things, but I’m watching dp like a hawk right now.

OP posts:
Strike000 · 12/01/2021 09:26

I don’t think it matters how long ago he last used it. I think as long as his iCloud account is still activated on the old phone, it will continue to show, as Find My will show all the devices linked to that iCloud account. Most people would deactivate their iCloud account on an old device when they upgraded their phone, but it’s possible he didn’t bother.

2020wish · 12/01/2021 10:11

I just deleted my daughters iPhone of off my apple account on my phone as it was still appearing there even tho it’s been lying in the drawers for years... not too sure on the find my phone feature tho

Dizzy1234 · 12/01/2021 10:28

My DP hides left over euros, passports etc in pockets of clothes in his wardrobe (funeral suit 🙄) that he doesn't wear often.
I on the other hand hide jewellery and money in the space under the bottom drawer of the chest of drawers, tilt it and slide stuff under, also the airing cupboard is a good place
We hide stuff from pote burglars not each other

FTM24 · 12/01/2021 10:45

@Dissillusioned do you know his iCloud log in? You would be able to log into his find my phone if you do and then can keep an eye on it

Original poster
Dissillusioned · 12/01/2021 11:21

Yes I know his login. There are no dating or chat apps downloaded either in the past or recently on his account except whatsapp on his normal phone.

OP posts:
FTM24 · 12/01/2021 11:23

@Dissillusioned can you try and log into his find my phone and keep an eye on it? Once the phone is on you can make it beep so you can find it in the house

Peppery123 · 12/01/2021 11:26

@Dissillusioned

Mine shows phones I havent used in ages . Ive had about 5 iphones and 2 ipads all registered to my icloud account and they still all show. Most of them havent even even turned on in years!

I think your best bet is to get a close friend or family member txting or calling you if you have a spare phone to download an app or something - make it sound realistic as possible. Maybe a friend with dc to make it sound really realistic, explain your situation and maybe they could say they need it for homeschooling their dc just to install an app for online learning. Get them to put it in a txt and receive the txt when youre sat near dp or same room to make it really realistic. Then just say so &so is asking for a spare phone if we have one. Ohhh hang on a minute, didnt you have yhatold iphone? Is it ok if she borrows it. I feel really bad for her"

This is what I would do as you would get to see his reaction and probably be able to tell just from thar. If he isnt using it he would be totally casual about it

MotherofTerriers · 12/01/2021 11:40

I would try to stay calm and keep watching. He probably realised that you were suspicious with the glasses case incident, so he will be being very very careful
I went through something similar - two identical phones, except one was grey and one black.
I'm sorry OP, its horrible

Juno231 · 12/01/2021 11:52

OP - have you checked his sent emails, that kind of thing? Linkedin messages? I once read of an affair couple who would write each other emails in the drafts of the same email account.

lilroo87 · 12/01/2021 12:20

I think he is definitely being wary as you mentioned his behaviour with the glasses case.
As you both work from home it is going to be difficult for him to hide a possible second phone forever and he'll slip up eventually, they always do!
Staying calm is easier said than done but he can probably sense there is something different with you.
It's likely he is keeping the phone close to him but probably hiding it at night, as other posters have said he's probably moving it to different places in the house. If the phones are identical then it is likely he's used it in front of you.
It's such a difficult situation to be in and I know how you feel. I'm with you on getting as much proof as possible because if you don't then he's more likely to say "you're making it up".
Hopefully you can find more if you try logging into his iCloud on a laptop and seeing if there is anything there. If he's not downloaded new apps then that's good.
Could it be someone he's secretly messaging on Facebook, Snapchat, Instagram? Although that could all be deleted/hidden off his current phone so not sure why a second phone would be needed. He could be using a dating site on a website rather than an app so you wouldn't see it and I never use the WiFi in my house so he could just be using his data.

MaMaD1990 · 12/01/2021 13:22

Are you sure he's not planning on proposing?? A lot if guys act oddly in the run up to a proposal and as you've spoken about it happening he could be planning something....

Wigglegiggle0520 · 12/01/2021 20:04

Have you seen the charging cable being used OP? Hope you’re ok Flowers

AmywithanL · 12/01/2021 21:16

I hope this has an happy ending 🙏🏻

meecrowahvay · 12/01/2021 22:22

@Dissillusioned I lost an iPhone when drunk YEARS ago. It still shows on my find my iphone
That's not a smoking gun but everything else seems a bit odd.

You can login to find my iphone on a computer (via iCloud.com). I'd login and monitor that if you have to.

I think there’s another phone
meecrowahvay · 12/01/2021 22:25

Although, word of caution I've just logged into find my iphone on my browser and received an email.

TomorrowIsAnotherDae · 12/01/2021 22:33

Is there any way you could check his bank statements or similar to see if he’s paying for another sim OP?

isthismylifenow · 13/01/2021 07:40

@MaMaD1990

Are you sure he's not planning on proposing?? A lot if guys act oddly in the run up to a proposal and as you've spoken about it happening he could be planning something....
This has been a thought of mine.

Or maybe some sort of birthday surprize.

Boomboombroom · 13/01/2021 09:41

Are you ok @Dissillusioned???

Original poster
Dissillusioned · 13/01/2021 10:38

Sorry, been quiet for a while, had an ill child and loads of work to deal with.
The charger hasn't been moved. I also have access to all bank statements and have checked to see if there's any other mobile contracts on there going out and there isn't. He also has a load of receipts he hasn't sorted and theres nothing on those to show any pay as you go topups.
No other midnight flits downstairs either. So either he knows I'm suspicious, or there's actually no phone. If there is one and he's laying off it for a while he won't do that forever. I'm thinking of asking him later and see what his reaction is. Or I'll ask where the old phone is, mine might start playing up a bit today and I need it for work, so he'd be very unreasonable to say I couldn't use it.
I need to know one way or the other.

OP posts:
Catty1720 · 13/01/2021 10:52

I think asking for the other phone for work would be the best thing to do. You need to resolve this as quickly as you can for your own MH if nothing else ☺️

Tigertigertigertiger · 13/01/2021 11:09

I hope everyone is wrong.

I don't believe "trust your instincts " applies 100% of the time.

It's almost like a mantra on here and that's dangerous.

Happyone8 · 13/01/2021 11:11

I would definitely ask for the other phone for work , make sure he doesn’t try to fix your existing one as that’s what my dh would do first ! Think of an excuse to have ready in case he wants to see your phone . Good luck , hopefully this is all nothing

SecondStageIgnition · 13/01/2021 11:15

Don't ask him if he's got a secret phone. If he does have one he's not likely to admit to it. Just bide your time. Your idea about asking to use his old phone is a much better idea.

Zubla · 13/01/2021 11:27

@Dissillusioned

Sorry, been quiet for a while, had an ill child and loads of work to deal with. The charger hasn't been moved. I also have access to all bank statements and have checked to see if there's any other mobile contracts on there going out and there isn't. He also has a load of receipts he hasn't sorted and theres nothing on those to show any pay as you go topups. No other midnight flits downstairs either. So either he knows I'm suspicious, or there's actually no phone. If there is one and he's laying off it for a while he won't do that forever. I'm thinking of asking him later and see what his reaction is. Or I'll ask where the old phone is, mine might start playing up a bit today and I need it for work, so he'd be very unreasonable to say I couldn't use it. I need to know one way or the other.
Sounds like you e had a stressful time- hope you resolve this soon for some peace of mind 😊
Peppery123 · 13/01/2021 12:19

^^@Dissillusioned

So either he knows I'm suspicious, or there's actually no phone. If there is one and he's laying off it for a while he won't do that forever. I'm thinking of asking him later and see what his reaction is.

Hi op..Im the one who suggested about doing tbis but if you want to make it really realistic, get someone you know to text you asking if they have a spare phone they could use. Make sure they text this when youre sat with him so it looks even more genuine. He will no way think its suspicous especially if you receive that text right in front of him and can even hand him your phone to read it.

I have done this before a few times so I know. Also have worked as a PI. So have a few skills up my sleeve lol

I just worry if you ask him for his spare phone because "its playing up" he might be 10 steps ahead or know youre suspicious so he might even have a look at your phone or offer to fix it. Thats just two options that would put you back in square 1 and give him the ball

If you do it the way I previously suggested, its much more genuine. If you really wanna go all put buy a cheap phone n sim n txt it to your phone pretending to be a friend or your mum. It could go something like "having to homeschool the kids using that cbeebies app. You dont happen to have a spare phone lying around do u so the kids could use it..im desperate. Just askin around my contacts..cheers*