He ignored my "merry Christmas text"

[sunflowerbloom]

I'm not going to lie I feel really sad today.
My mum died in September and it's obviously my first Xmas without her.
I was seeing a guy(who wasn't treating me well) always twisted things to make me the one in the wrong etc but I loved him.
Anyway it ended but we started speaking again (just normal chat )
He was texting me and start conversations again,he made out he was doing me a huge favour talking to me.
Anyway last night (it was my birthday too) I messaged him "merry Christmas,have a great day,hope Santa is good to you"
He read it and didn't reply.
He's been on social media since.
I mean ..he couldn't even string a merry Christmas reply back.
Even tho we've made up recently and been speaking.
He knew it was my birthday too,he knew I was alone without my mum.
Isn't that cruel ?
I feel so sad today (please don't send nasty replies to this thread ,I don't want to feel more sad )

This is not love it's the complete opposite.
Right chin up now and block the little bastard straightaway.
You sound far far too nice and good for him.
He will not bring you happiness only misery.
Have a lovely day with your DF and I wish you the best New Year ever without this toe-rag in it x

I don't think it's about him being interested or not interested it's the fact we have been speaking for weeks again now.
Him initiating conversations then going cold on me again.
It's a simple merry Christmas and he's chose not to reply after speaking to me fine a few days ago.

I'm blocking him and moving on otherwise i would be forever checking and waiting for him to text
It's no good

@sunflowerbloom

I know at Christmas I get messages from people I've never seen in years and don't speak too yet I always wish them a lovely Xmas I guess that's the difference between me and him He does know il be wondering what I've done wrong. He knows il be upset He made me apologise for my behaviour two weeks ago when it was him. He said I should realise my behaviour was childish and regret my actions (basically tell him his behaviour was shit )

so when you were asking why he didn't message , you already knew . He's a cock !

Also what he does is if I text and he doesn't reply he knows I will ask why he's not replying then he will say
"Oh god why are you behaving like this"
When if he hadn't of blew cold again I wouldn't be asking him why he wasn't replying
I don't know if that makes sense

Sorry he's just not interested in anything more than an ego boost and conversation to keep him company.

@Sunflowerbloom
Yes it makes total sense - he's abusive and he enjoys giving you pain.
I honestly feel sorry for anyone that gets involved with him because he is not a good person.

@sunflowerbloom

I'm blocking him and moving on otherwise i would be forever checking and waiting for him to text It's no good

This can only improve your life. Well done on making that decision!

You done it yet?

@sunflowerbloom

I'm blocking him and moving on otherwise i would be forever checking and waiting for him to text It's no good

Well done! 0

First of all im so sorry to hear your mum has passed this cant have been easy for you.
I know this sounds blunt but sometimes we need to hear it, this guy sounds like he has found you vulnerable and took full advantage of your kind nature. You said about that he may actually enjoy upsetting you always trust your instinct. This is power play, he feels so insecure with himself he needs to put you down to prop himself up. Your right, if he cared he would at least have text you back. Im a single parent with 3 children and i have the heart and time to send this message on christmas day. Please look after yourself like others have said put your precious energy into yourself and the people who care about you. Sending hugs this Christmas

STOP PLEASE JUST STOP!

Your wasting so much energy thinking about why he didn't text you. Who cares, he is a crap guy thats it and more than enough reason. Stop giving him so much of your head space.

Block his text, if he somehow contacts you dont bother responding. He is nothing, not worth a single more sec of your time, energy or even thinking about him.

Move on and all this crap people perputste about getting closure or knowing why, naw I don't buy into it. You know he uss crap and not deserving of you and no explanation feom him is going to make up for way he treated you. His loss so enjoy the rest of the year without thinking about him or why he did what he did.

I just feel stupid as he will have looked at that message and chose to ignore me.
I feel like I've gave him all the power.
I don't even deserve a merry Christmas in his eyes.
I've blocked him

Well done OP. It'll start getting easier, and almost a relief because you can stop looking at your phone and waiting to see if he'll text.
Now you've made space in your heart for someone lovely x

Thankyou
I just wish I knew would I had done wrong this time.

*what

@sunflowerbloom

Thankyou I just wish I knew would I had done wrong this time.

YOU havent done anything wrong! HE is choosing to behave like this towards you . Its controlling behaviour.

Who cares why he’s not replied. To be harsh, you say he’s horrible so why are you giving him the time of day? You’re allowing the way you feel about yourself to be ruled by the actions of someone who doesn’t care.

My life got much better when I realised I was allowing people the power to hurt me, by pursuing people who clearly weren’t interested. You are giving him the power to hurt you over and over again. You can choose to keep messaging him and getting worked up when he inevitably comes in and out of your life as he pleases, or you can take control and stop giving him that power. Block him, delete his number, remove him from social media and move on.

I think sometimes if you're a decent kind person you literally can't believe someone else isn't... therefore you keep giving them chances to redeem themselves. In the nicest possible way, stop wasting your time. Regain control of the situation and if he contacts you, ignore.

He sounds like a total jerk op. You are better off without him in your life, as a friend or anything else. Happy Christmas to you! Hope you're having a fantastic day .

You've done nothing 'wrong'.
It really IS him, not you x

I've been here btw, judging my own self through 'their' eyes, hard to get out of when they put you down, randomly go off the boil so you question yourself.

It's really hard to switch it around...it's only the last few weeks I've got better.

They manufacture these reactions I'm sure.

With him he treats me like crap,so I react and stand up for myself.
So he blames me reacting for our argument and not his behaviour that made me react like that.
A week ago today he was chatting normally and very texty ..now no reply to a merry Christmas message
It's not me it's him
It's always him
I'm done with it now tho.
He's a prick

And now forget about him its been almost the entire day since you posted just forget him, stop thinking about him and talking about him

It’s very cruel @sunflowerbloom a similar thing happened to a close friend a couple of years ago, almost the same set of circumstances. It was a dark time for her but she’s ok and happy now. You will be too. This man has hurt you. You deserve and will find better. Xx