Wanking to porn in bed while your asleep

[LemoneyGin]

Woke up last night to OH wanking to porn on his phone. I've previously said to him that I would find that really uncomfortable and have asked several times if he's ever done it whilst I'm asleep next to me & he said no never. Clearly that's a lie & he's admitted it's been 'a few times', I feel really deflated about this - he's lied to my face & has no respect for me (otherwise he would have respected my wishes). How can I trust what he says? We're due to be married next year.

I wouldn't have an issue with the porn but probably the watching next to me while sleeping I wouldn't like. Would just communicate this to my dh though

If I woke up and found my husband doing that, I’d join in and help him out if I could be arsed, if not I’d go back to sleep and leave him to it. He would do the same.

OP,
Once you are happy with the relationship that is what counts.

Don't ever feel bad for having YOUR boundaries and expressing them.

If you don't feel you can express them, both you and your relationship are in trouble.

Always listen to your gut and you can't go far wrong.

Best of luck.

@MuckyPlucky

Am I honestly reading on here that so many MNers really think masturbation is “vile” “gross” “private” “should be done in the shower” “like having a shit” etc?! WTAF?! This is utterly depressing. Masturbation itself isn’t dirty, wrong, vile, sinful etc.

Granted, if the OP for whatever reason doesn’t like her DP having a wank whilst she’s asleep then he should respect that. Personally, wouldn’t bother me in slightest tho; me and DP both enjoy a wank whenever we want one, whether the other one is there/sleeping/joining in or not. Sometimes I’ll have a wank whilst we’re watching a film, or he’ll have a wank whilst I’m reading the paper next to him in bed. We enjoy the closeness of knowing we can be ourselves sexually, and not judged etc.

This seems a healthy reply to me.

He should absolutely be listening to your views though OP