I’m going to cancel Christmas in my house

[Unsurekitten84]

I think the UK should have made that decision tbh. No mixing of households. Keep the tier system. Just leave it this year.
I’m quite looking forward to not having to put the tree up or wrap the stupid stocking presents. In fact it is possibly one of the few covid upsides. The downside is my MiL will still demand to see us and is looking forward to everything going ‘back to normal’ for five days, during which she will see everyone she’s ever met 🙄. I’ve said I don’t want to go but dh has overruled me as apparently she has to see her grandchildren on Christmas Day.
We won’t be seeing my family though.

Be an adult and tell DH you’re not going to MILs but he is welcome to and work out who is having the kids.

@Unsurekitten84

They’ve two parents. Why is it my job alone?

It's not but you are the one bitching about it on here. If your DH were posting the same I would think and tell him he's an equal Christmas arsehole and the pair of you should make some fucking effort for your children.

Omg your kids are 5 and 12 years old get a grip OP create memories not misery

What happens if you put your foot down and say no its my parents this year like it should be?

OMG I’m literally sat here jaw on the floor at OP cancelling her two children (proper children not even like teens) Christmas!!

Holy hell that’s insanely harsh! You’re allowed to be fed up OP but Jesus have your kids not had a crap year too? No tree, no gifts, no ...Christmas. At there age I think ‘the year mum cancelled Christmas because she couldn’t be arsed’ will really stick with them. I’d think very carefully.

Take the DC to your parents & let DH go to his mother.

@Unsurekitten84

I’m unable to see my parents because of seeing MiL. It’s meant to be a three household closed bubble. So it would have to be her, us, my parents. But she will see everyone she knows so that can’t be the case. We were meant to have my parents over for lunch but now obviously can’t.

If she's seeing everyone she knows then you won't be in a 3 household bubble even if you only see her.

You can visit your parents your being a child!! Grow up and stop sulking it's not attractive in an adult.

How would you 'treat it like a normal day' with a five and twelve year old, regardless of what MIL does?

I really feel for your children right now you sound awfully cold how can you make no effort at all to make it something wonderful for them especially with the5 year old stop being a grinch just because you don't want to the kids will.

Ruining your children’s Christmas over an argument with your dh is really selfish.

You don’t want to see your mil-don’t. I don’t understand why you’re being such a martyr about that. Just. don’t. go.

Basically, you want to cancel your kids Christmas to spite your DH. What is your thinking behind this? Do you think "ha he's going to feel so guilty when he sees how upset the kids are"? Children are not a weapon or a tool for manipulation!

Wow, you seem to be obsessed with your mother in law and not thinking about your kids at all. I’m not a huge fan of Christmas either but make an effort for my children. No tree just seems mean.

@Unsurekitten84

No, because I’m fed up. But I don’t get to be fed up because I’m mum.

I mean yeah that's kind of the deal when you have kids

Because MiL gets her way as she shouts loudest. She will announce it is her turn again next year and he will agree.

@Unsurekitten84

Because MiL gets her way as she shouts loudest. She will announce it is her turn again next year and he will agree.

So. Don’t. Go.

Why does your DH get to decide? What happens if you just say, ‘no, my folks are coming round as planned. Yours won’t stay in our bubble, so you’ll have to see them outdoors.’

It is fine to be fed up but it isn't fine to spoil Christmas for your children because you are annoyed with your DH.

So divorce the twat. You don't seem to like him much.

@Sweettea1

I really feel for your children right now you sound awfully cold how can you make no effort at all to make it something wonderful for them especially with the5 year old stop being a grinch just because you don't want to the kids will.

She sounds like a spoiled child making threats because she’s pissed off. I’m fairly sure there is some sullen faces, foot stamping or other dramatics going on

But trying to weaponise your kids is as low as it gets. Announcing I’m going to ruin Christmas for my children becayse I’m not getting my own way is a new low.

So shout a bit fucking louder then. You're perfectly good at sulking on here why not do it in real life to and tell these people no.

I get that you are fed up, and you are quite right that it shouldn't be all on your shoulders to do the Christmas prep.

But cancelling Christmas for your kids is weaponising your kids and a step too far. It isn't their fault so don't punish them.

No MiL won’t have a bubble, more an ocean.
But I don’t feel it’s fair to then put my parents at risk given her high contact in a tier 3 area - my dad was shielded first lockdown.

See your parents before he goes to MILs. No extra risk to your parents.

Sorted.

We’re not mixing households this year either. But guess what, we’re still having a wonderful Christmas time.
YABVU.