Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Right to be offended by tonight's comments

158 replies

GenevieD · 12/10/2020 22:42

So my on/off partner messaged me tonight and said he hasent been in touch all day because hes absolutely furious at something that happened today. So he basically got pulled by police for something he shouldn't have been doing and got an on the spot fine.
He said he got victimised because he is a hardworking straight white Male. Then he said to the police officer I bet if I was a woman, or on benefits or of colour you would have let me off because it's not worth your job.

I was horrified to hear he had said that and I've really taken offence tonight. I am a single parent yes I work really hard to look after my daughter (but I do get a little bit of additional support in the way of benefits). He said woman would turn on the water works and say it's time of the month or use some other excuse like 'I'm pregnant' to get away with it.

So it's now turned into a little bit of a slanging match. He says nobody feels sorry for him because hes a white Male. Hes slated women tonight. Yesterday when I was out with him we were walking in the woods and there was a woman with an 18 month old toddler on reins and he walked really closely and impatiently behind him, so the lady said move over to let the man through, he stormed through. And then he said can you believe how sarcastic that woman was to me!!!

Theres been so many things go on lately, but these are huge red flags arent they?

OP posts:
imissthesouth · 13/10/2020 01:46

The police fine you because you're committing an offence, not because you're a straight white male lol. Men these days seem to be getting more entitled. Get rid OP.

1forAll74 · 13/10/2020 02:16

So he breaks the law in his car, and mouths off to the police, you see this all the time in the TV police programmes, certain types of people do this,, usually angry men who don't care about anything.

SeaToSki · 13/10/2020 02:26

Time to trade him in

RomeoLikedCapuletGirls · 13/10/2020 02:33

He said he got victimised because he is a hardworking straight white male

I would bin him but as a parting gift buy him the book by Laura Bates “Men who hate women”. I think he’d recognise himself in there

Fortunategirl · 13/10/2020 05:34

Gross man! Get rid

redcarbluecar · 13/10/2020 05:51

Blimey, that's a of chips on one shoulder. He sounds like a whiny, nasty perpetual victim. I'd say dump.

blueberrypie0112 · 13/10/2020 06:15

@GenevieD

So my on/off partner messaged me tonight and said he hasent been in touch all day because hes absolutely furious at something that happened today. So he basically got pulled by police for something he shouldn't have been doing and got an on the spot fine. He said he got victimised because he is a hardworking straight white Male. Then he said to the police officer I bet if I was a woman, or on benefits or of colour you would have let me off because it's not worth your job.

I was horrified to hear he had said that and I've really taken offence tonight. I am a single parent yes I work really hard to look after my daughter (but I do get a little bit of additional support in the way of benefits). He said woman would turn on the water works and say it's time of the month or use some other excuse like 'I'm pregnant' to get away with it.

So it's now turned into a little bit of a slanging match. He says nobody feels sorry for him because hes a white Male. Hes slated women tonight. Yesterday when I was out with him we were walking in the woods and there was a woman with an 18 month old toddler on reins and he walked really closely and impatiently behind him, so the lady said move over to let the man through, he stormed through. And then he said can you believe how sarcastic that woman was to me!!!

Theres been so many things go on lately, but these are huge red flags arent they?

I am not surprised. he is still alive too. White men always feel like they are losing their top spot on a totem pole. So they play the “this is not fair” game

He got pulled over because he clearly broke the law.

MrsMaglev · 13/10/2020 06:30

Goodness he sounds like an angry man. I'd be upset too OP, seems like you've got a consensus view here to bin him off and watch your life improve vastly! I'd be wondering how long til he lost his shit with me z- think we're in for a long and stressful winter so I'd be worried that'll provoke more rages

fuzzymoon · 13/10/2020 06:36

I'm bemused why you haven't ended the relationship and are still with him.

Please let your next post say you've ended it.

ulanbatorismynextstop · 13/10/2020 06:44

Awful awful awful, bin him and block him.

Bluntness100 · 13/10/2020 06:49

I’m also curious why you’ve not ended this but are basically mulling it over on here. Especially since you’ve a child who will be witness to his behaviour at some point,

Personally I’d be ashamed by someone like that, and like it or not, I would assume you’re the same if you willingly stick with him. It can’t bother you too much if you’re willing to keep on dating him and shagging him.

blueberrypie0112 · 13/10/2020 06:51

“he is still alive too”
Sorry for a second I thought he is living in US because i hear this often here too. It is ridiculous. Then I just now saw “on benefits” and realized I got the wrong country.

The reason for the “still alive” because what happened to George Floyd and many other people.

Armyofone · 13/10/2020 06:52

The triumvirate of cuntishness.

Grin
CaraDuneRedux · 13/10/2020 07:07

Definitely time for "on/off" to become "permanently off.". Though it does sound like the scales are finally falling from your eyes.

Onwards and upwards, OP.

Soubriquet · 13/10/2020 07:12

Well isn’t he a prince among men eh?

Everyone is out to get him, it isn’t fair on the poor little soul and everyone must bend over backwards to help him

Gross

Hailtomyteeth · 13/10/2020 07:15

'Bye, mister.'

firsttimemummyxxxxx · 13/10/2020 07:19

Get rid! Sounds like an arsehole! X

CaptainMyCaptain · 13/10/2020 07:26

He's a twat. Get rid of him.

Cantmakeupmind · 13/10/2020 07:51

I second want PP said. I was seeing someone before who referred to a corner shop in the uk as a p**i shop Hmm ‘I’m not racist, what else do I call it?’. I can think of plenty of other things! My dad was quite racist growing up and I’ve always been adamant I would not tolerate it in a future partner. This man sounds awful PP

GrandAltogether · 13/10/2020 08:05

‘Don’t let the door hit you on the way out, sucker.’

MoonJelly · 13/10/2020 08:07

Have you booted him, OP?

Soubriquet · 13/10/2020 08:07

@Cantmakeupmind

I second want PP said. I was seeing someone before who referred to a corner shop in the uk as a p**i shop Hmm ‘I’m not racist, what else do I call it?’. I can think of plenty of other things! My dad was quite racist growing up and I’ve always been adamant I would not tolerate it in a future partner. This man sounds awful PP
I always used to call the shop this as I was growing up...because everyone else did and I didn’t know any better

I don’t call it that anymore..as I grew up and learned it was racist

MuserOwl · 13/10/2020 08:09

Omg, awful. Single mothers get few breaks. His comments are offensive generally and also particularly very dismissive of single parents.
An Off Off relationship will be a step up

MrsElijahMikaelson1 · 13/10/2020 08:11

The hills =>>>

Spudlet · 13/10/2020 08:17

Yuck, he sounds irredeemably vile. Think how nice it will be not to be waiting for the next racist, sexist, whiney, self-pitying rant to land in your ear or on your phone... bliss!