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Original poster

DP said a very strange thing tonight ?!

712 replies

Underpressure13 · 28/08/2020 20:55

DP has called by tonight to hang out for the evening with me and the kids .
When he came through the door the first thing he said was ‘ok so where are these sausage rolls to reheat ?’
Earlier today my mum who was caring for the kids whilst I worked, cooked some sausage rolls and left the remaining ones we didn’t eat in oven for me to reheat for DP and kids tonight.
There’s no way he’d have known of this as both myself , nor my mum have mentioned this to him today and he knew they were in there without being told or even looking . They hadn’t recently been cooked and place didn’t smell of them.
When I questioned him on how he knew, he just said ‘ oh, instinct I guess’ no further explanation Shock
Is it strange he said that? I can’t quite work this out !!

OP posts:
managedmis · 29/08/2020 00:40

But surely he wouldn't be that stupid? If he was spying on you, to then let it slip?

Or is he stupid as well as controlling?

I'd say it's more likely he smelt the sausage rolls and subconsciously talked about them

Allusernamesalreadyused · 29/08/2020 00:42

Is this sauserious??? Made up word to suit occasion but isn't this a massive Pis*take??? Please tell me it is or the MN world has gone even more crazy than I ever imagined 😲😲🤣

chickenyhead · 29/08/2020 00:45

if he is accustomed to listening all of the time, he would likely assume over time that it was normal. Think that he was in the room, which he secretly was. If he's been doing this a long time he will slip up.

I hope you didn't give him the sausage rolls. I would have denied their existence.

What sausage rolls? Eh?

Instinct my arse

Mistlewoeandwhine · 29/08/2020 00:47

You need to get someone to check out your phone.

EggyPegg · 29/08/2020 00:49

Having a photo of the back of your phone is suspect as fuck. I agree about trying to pique his interest and say something random. Could be the speaker. Might not be. Make it disappear.

forumdonkey · 29/08/2020 00:54

Set a trap. Have a conversation with a friend with a massive untruth and see if he hints or asks you about it. Then you'll know if you're being bugged

amitoooldforthisshit · 29/08/2020 01:04

if hes spying on you then get rid

CarpetDiem · 29/08/2020 01:07

What a gaslighting oddball- I think he’s somehow got access to your messages, if you both have iPhones they can be synced when on wifi. He’s grown so used to knowing your every move that he’s probably finding it difficult to separate info. Red flags +

SoulofanAggron · 29/08/2020 01:30

But surely he wouldn't be that stupid? If he was spying on you, to then let it slip?

@managedmis If it's anything like my ex, as I said upthread, that was part of what he was doing. He would mention things that were in my email etc. The point was to let me know I was being surveiled, to creep me out, make him feel in control, and to try and control what I did/wrote by letting me know he was watching what I was doing, in my case via email or online in general.

@Underpressure13 I agree with PP's that if he took a photo so he could know the model of your phone, he did that for a reason and it involves surveiling you in some way- and could be only one of the ways he's doing that- sorry. Sad

Didkdt · 29/08/2020 01:45

Ugh just break up with him.
You don't trust him and don't want to judging by your other thread and this one.
You're lying awake fretting about a comment about sausage rolls.
Just end the misery for both of you. I feel sorry for him. He made a comment about sausage rolls and got the 3rd degree fine if he's guiltily in which case dump him and unfair on him if he isn't in which case cut him free from you and yet another crazy leap over the facts

wombat1a · 29/08/2020 02:05

If you remove all the fairly impossible answers then what you are left with is that he is spying on you.

You're issue is now to find it and confront him/get police involved and get him arrested.

Alongcameacat · 29/08/2020 02:35

Break the bluetooth and leave this man.

There is no trust there if you suspect he is cheating or spying on you. He should not have taken a photo of the back of your phone either. The whole 'relationship' is one of mistrust and suspicion. Why would you want to stay involved with this person?

imissthesouth · 29/08/2020 02:44

From reading the thread I really am quite concerned for your safety. Especially with the bluetooth speaker and photo of the back of your iphone. The fact he said reheating is too much to drop, he's listening in on you somehow. Make the speaker have an accident, factory reset your phone, and leave this man.

Neves7 · 29/08/2020 02:47

Set a trap for him to walk into... Mention something improbable that no one would guess that you are going to do when you know he is wfh at his place and send a message to a friend about this on your phone. Like say you are going to shave your head, join the circus, run away to Brazil etc (well maybe not those exact examples) and see if he comments.

chickenyhead · 29/08/2020 03:02

Have a pretend conversation that you are pregnant, that should be impossible to keep to himself

Lifeisabeach09 · 29/08/2020 03:46

Agree with PPs. Almost certain he is listening in on your conversations. I wonder if he has put spyware on your laptop too.
Dump him and replace the tech if possible.

Oh, him bringing up reheating the sausage rolls is pure gaslight mind-fuckery.

WindyRose · 29/08/2020 04:20

Sorry OP but imho he's definitely spying! You could set a trap but why should you have to do that? a loving DP would 'never' bug your house etc and the fact he's tech savvy adds more weight to this thought.

No need to replace your tech or hire a PI, there are apps available so you can check for yourself. Sorry I don't have an iPhone but you could easily do a search and find one.......better still, ask your Mum, in case he has a tracker on your phone. Do you have an old phone (or burner) that you could use for a few days? Don't discuss a listening device with 'anyone' in your house, if you find one, leave it in situ and call the cops.

Last year I thought my horrible neighbour had a hidden camera aimed at the side of my house, so I downloaded an Android app to check and while I didn't find anything at the time, he did have time to remove it.

Another option is a small USB recorder which is readily available on eBay and can be hidden in a pot plant/flowers/picture frame/etc/etc, one of these would be 'very' easy for him to hide in your house while he's visiting and you've gone to the toilet, put the kids to bed, etc.

Sorry but he's one step ahead of you in tech and has easy access to your house during visits.

BumbleBeeeeeee · 29/08/2020 04:36

Bin him off, this is fucking creepy. I wouldn't say it's hugely unlikely either that he's reading this thread. We see you, spooky sausage man 👀👀

StoppinBy · 29/08/2020 04:47

That's certainly concerning if it's not something you do regularly.

Manolin · 29/08/2020 04:54

Hi name is not Bob. Its Gregg.

Monty27 · 29/08/2020 05:01

Does your mum do this often OP? Perhaps he's just innocently predicting it

oakleaffy · 29/08/2020 06:30

@forumdonkey

Set a trap. Have a conversation with a friend with a massive untruth and see if he hints or asks you about it. Then you'll know if you're being bugged
Definitely.
Diverseopinions · 29/08/2020 06:36

It is also surprising that he just happened to call round. It sounds, bizarre as it sounds, like the sort of thing he'd do if he wanted to see whether you were up to something. It's such an ordinary type of food, I can hardly see he'd be chomping at the bit to try this delicacy, straight away.

It sounds like the sort of thing a partner would say if they'd seen a message about 'reheating sausage rolls' and had thought it was a coded message to someone else, for: for 'I'm on my own with the kids - come round.'

SnakesOrLadders · 29/08/2020 06:43

I think if I was really unsure I would set a trap too as a test. Thing is now you’ve questioned him if he really is spying on you he might be extra cautious/suspicious of you testing him so it might not work straight away.

oakleaffy · 29/08/2020 06:44

''Reheating sausage rolls'' as a codeword for an affair?...Hadn't thought of that...Maybe he thought OP was ''reheating another man's 'Sausage'....What a ghastly thought!
Such subterfuge...
I'd suspect bugging.