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Original poster

DP said a very strange thing tonight ?!

712 replies

Underpressure13 · 28/08/2020 20:55

DP has called by tonight to hang out for the evening with me and the kids .
When he came through the door the first thing he said was ‘ok so where are these sausage rolls to reheat ?’
Earlier today my mum who was caring for the kids whilst I worked, cooked some sausage rolls and left the remaining ones we didn’t eat in oven for me to reheat for DP and kids tonight.
There’s no way he’d have known of this as both myself , nor my mum have mentioned this to him today and he knew they were in there without being told or even looking . They hadn’t recently been cooked and place didn’t smell of them.
When I questioned him on how he knew, he just said ‘ oh, instinct I guess’ no further explanation Shock
Is it strange he said that? I can’t quite work this out !!

OP posts:
CornishTiger · 06/09/2020 14:49

Who goes into a house and opens oven?!

sunshineandshowers21 · 06/09/2020 14:59

so much drama. how can people be bothered to engage in relationships centred around so much drama? it just sounds so draining, and it can’t be good for your kids. honestly it sounds like you enjoy it, op. keeping on coming back with the latest updates and endlessly speculating - just to turn around and say ‘oh, false alarm, never mind.’ this isn’t a healthy or normal relationship! and having multiple email addresses isn’t unusual - but having multiple phones and sim cards is.

excelledyourself · 06/09/2020 15:01

He's okay about it all now?

So basically he's made himself into the poor, unappreciated victim, because he was "trying to make your life easier".

Painful reading there, OP.

Good luck.

amillionwishes · 06/09/2020 15:03

Why the fuck would you give him the benefit of the doubt when you KNOW he didn't open the oven???

Op I'm inclined to agree with others, you've no intention of actually following your (most likely correct) instincts and you appear to enjoy the drama.

JulesCobb · 06/09/2020 15:08

He was pretty annoyed about the fact I’d thought him capable of those things and we talked about that and my lack of trust in him so it is your fault?

He’s ok about it all now - we both realise we need to work on a lot of things if it’s going to work
HE is ok about it now? Well, good for him. But it wasnt about how he was felling was it!

It is ridiculous to continue with this relationship. It would be a mistake if you were young and childfree. Now, it is an appalling lack of judgement.

You need some counselling dealing with boundaries. It would really help.

TimelyManor · 06/09/2020 15:16

He has taken himself off everything.
Removed all the evidence you mean Hmm

Anyway he denies any wrong doing and tried to explain how most of that had happened.
Of course he was going to deny it. And lie to your face.

He's ok about it all now
Oh well that's good then.

FFS, I'm not one for normally getting annoyed at someone ignoring shitloads of advice they've asked for but come on, OP, you're either enjoying spinning us all along or are seriously under his creepy spell.

OhCaptain · 06/09/2020 15:41

I don’t know why you’re all giving her the attention she so obviously craves to be honest.

Tomatoesneedtoripen · 06/09/2020 15:50

oh so he's all right

what about you?

Tomatoesneedtoripen · 06/09/2020 15:50

i dont think anyone would be happy with the Find my phone and other aspects of this relationship

Mix56 · 06/09/2020 16:09

So why did he photograph the back of your phone? it does NOT add up.
Tell him your will still do a factory reset of your equipment & turn off your hotspot when he is there,
Change your email password.
You are old enough to know when a relationship is not healthy. you are behaving like a teenager

MsJinks · 06/09/2020 16:10

Does he normally check the oven for food Hmm - sounds like a certain Advisor’s eye test to me. Tbh without him saying this actual thing it was all a bit muddied and full of could haves to me - I’m not that techy though, but this excuse sounds pretty sus. Of course he’s annoyed, you caught him out! Anyway, as others have said sounds a bit dead in the water now - you will constantly be checking, or wondering and he will constantly either up his spying game or feel uncomfortable and watched. It’s not easy to split but it’s not going to be much fun staying together now either. Be kind to yourself.

iMatter · 06/09/2020 16:11

Good luck with this shitshow OP

You're going to need it

Buggedandconfused · 06/09/2020 16:59

Oh goody, new episode. Wonder what tomorrow will bring?

HuggedTheRedwoods · 06/09/2020 17:13

I think I will have to watch this space and see if this relationship has any legs going forward.

Going forward? OP, it doesn't have legs now! Also, dont forget the weirdo has most likely been following this thread so will be even more devious in future.

Motoko · 06/09/2020 17:17

Even if you didn't see him opening the oven door, you'd have heard it if you were in the same room. You're being really stupid to believe his lies and carry on with this relationship.

PickwickThePlockingDodo · 06/09/2020 17:32

Wouldn't a bloke who has been accused of all this tell you to F off? I think he would. So he's either lying or you are, hmmm.

KeepingPlain · 06/09/2020 17:35

Dump him, factory reset the computer (preferably burn it and buy a new one) and change the locks on your house just incase. Also tell the police he's been spying on you on your computer as he most certainly has.

Check the rest of the house carefully for any other gadgets, small cameras or microphones.

Sorry to sound dramatic, but he's stalking you, wants to control you and he's knowledgeable on computers. That's a dangerous combination.

GrannyBags · 06/09/2020 17:43

Having ploughed through this I’m becoming more and more convinced is a set up by the producers of Corrie to see if this is a storyline anyone would find believable.

TorkTorkBam · 06/09/2020 18:13

Do the Freedom Programme.

General counselling would be a good idea.

Also, get in the habit of leaving your phone in a different room and your laptops powered off.

iMatter · 06/09/2020 19:23

@Buggedandconfused

Oh goody, new episode. Wonder what tomorrow will bring?
Haha! I wonder...
SixesAndEights · 06/09/2020 19:35

Re sausage roll gate , he says that when he first came into the house he had quickly opened the oven and seen the sausage rolls . I didn’t see him do that even though I was in the same room, but I think I’ll have to take his word on it and give the benefit of the doubt .

GrinGrinGrinGrin

If this is all true then you really must be the most gullible person in the world, and out of 7 billion people that's pretty good going!

He must be laughing his head off at the amount of bollocks you'll believe.

Ogham · 06/09/2020 20:24

How can you give him the benefit of the doubt if you were in the same room as him and didn’t see him open the oven door, seriously? Catch a grip!
There are so so many niggles and obvious lies (ie opening the oven door!). Ignore all the signs at your peril

AcrossthePond55 · 06/09/2020 20:41

"He’s ok about it all now"

You've been DARVO'd.

Even if he didn't spy (and I'm not completely convinced) he's still DARVO'd you.

PicsInRed · 06/09/2020 20:56

If it wasn't for knowing how popular spy cams have become with perverts (the women of South Korea are now so spied upon in public toilets that they had street protests about it), I'd assume this was made up baloney. But baloney or not, there's a growing cohort of perverts who monitor their partners - and intentionally or otherwise, also the children. Some even sell footage on, banal or explicit, all goes online and is shared around.

OP, he's got all the stories, doesn't he? How much are you and your children worth? Is your family's security, privacy and dignity worth less than his control and gratification?

Elasticatedwaist · 06/09/2020 21:21

Hang on , I thought OP said that the oven was nowhere near the front door and he couldn’t have seen the sausage rolls . So how could he have opened the oven ?