I’d rather be dead.

[despairingandunhappy]

I hate DP.
I have never known a man so financially abusive in my life. He blames me for us having no money yet leaves me with £11 a month to live off after bills are paid. We’re 4 days before payday there is no food in my house and 10p in my bank. And all I have is him moaning about it, “he’d be better off in prison”
I’ve got fuck all. I’m glad we’re on lockdown cos it gives me an excuse to not go out. I don’t want my friends sending me pics of clothes they’re buying or holidays so I’ve come off social media. I need this off my chest because I’m about to explode.

I’d rather be fucking dead.

Great to hear! I'm still fairly new here so sometimes I think I've reached the last comment when I obviously haven't. Thanks for the insight, @Vodkacranberryplease

Op.
Take photos of the eye and your entire face (so you can see it's you) with the black
Eye - you might not want to go to police right now but later you might find the strength. There are lots of offences he has committed. Talk with the IDVA
Well done for leaving x

My IDVA is not pushing me to ring the police or anything, thankfully as it’s a rabbit hole I don’t wanna go down. Me and DS are happy and settled now. My eye is a fucking mess I’m so heartbroken DS has to see it, just glad he’s not old enough to understand

@despairingandunhappy

I literally feel like going to his mums punching her and taking everything she has, not out of malice but to see if she’d be the victim then, or would it be me. Pig has cried mental health to her. Unsurprisingly I have become very depressed and down recently. His mum obviously needs to protect her prince

Screenshot her message. Send a reply just the picture of your eye. If you have "find my iphone" make sure you have reset all your passwords.

Then phone your mobile provider and get them to change the number. Change your number. Screenshot her number and his -they delete the numbers from your phone. Delete.

Some parents are two faced. Mine sent me an email asking me to "be reasonable and make sure their son was ok too and asked me if they wanted them to mediate etc and then ............. I found a text saying "Dad and I will pay for your solicitor. We have got this one -see details below on retainer. Delete after reading this, make sure you empty the joint bank account and make the bitch pay -hide the money. Thanks for £5K transferred will hide it with M"

lovely.

I don’t understand as a mother to a boy how the fuck they can do it!

If you take a picture for no other reason, take one to look at if you ever ever get some kind of inclination to go back to him. It happens to the best of us so don't think you're weak if you start thinking about it. Just don't go through with it. Look back at your face and remember what lead you to the new life you're going to have now xx

Well done for your bravery OP. Do try and get a non mil if needed, and I would notify police when you're ready so that when you are housed you can get protection on your home x

Non molestation order *

Oh wow OP. Well done you. Glad you’re out of it.
I don’t understand his mother at all. Christ alive!!

You are so brave op. Honestly you sound such a lovely intelligent and articulate lady. I’m rooting for you.
I’m so sorry you have had to go through this. My mum went through awful dv, when I was a child and although I was young I remember certain flashbacks.
I have seen dv and have been sexually abused as a young teen.
Your strength and courage throughout this last week has been amazing! I’m in awe of you...
Keep going 💕

Thank you so much everyone. You have given me so much support and advice, and to those who have been through abuse I hope you are okay. My IDVA told me today we are not victims we are survivors!

I cannot stop eating. Help!!!

Enjoy that food, you bloody well deserve it!!!

Keep yourself steady...Op...

And yes... You are absolutely a survivour...I am too...I am with someone who loves me and whom I love too.

Eating is good, you will look so much better for it.
I plummeted too 6.7lbs at my worst.
Keep gaining strength, mind body and soul. You are amazing, just keep going xx

@fmlfmlfmlfm I think that was a Freudian slip... a non-mil should totally be a thing. Especially for OP

She’s text me now funnily enough, asking how I am again. I’ve put 4lbs on since Friday hahaha

Oh ignore the stupid cow.

I'm so glad you're eating, what are you eating. I'm hungry!!

She's text as she's panicking about not seeing her grandchild. Ignore her, any kindness or concern she shows now is her being self cantered. If she really cared she would have been concerned when you and her darling grandchild were living with her monster of a son. Fuck her.

She’s literally mithering me, it’s doing my head in I’ve moved all the messages to spam and turned my active status off on Facebook. My mums told me to just ignore everything from them and if they wanna take me to court for access to DS they’ve not got a chance

@thesunwillout I’ve been binge eating fucking Iceland party bits! I’m obsessed with them, especially the mini pizzas, strongly recommend

I think it's a good move not to block them so you can gather evidence. Having said that if you feel you are having a down day where you could even consider going back then that's the time to block them

Im late to this thread but it's so sad reading what you've been through...I think you're absolutely amazing and so brave to leave. Stay strong and keep eating ..it will feel wonderful having control over your own life and your own financial independence. Wishing you and your baby all the best

Glad you're enjoying party bits ☺️ haha!

Thank you everyone. I feel really shit tonight. His mums pissing me the fuck off, she’s sent me a message saying “love you can I have DS overnight” I’ve fucking told her she’s not seeing him, is NOTHING going in???