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Found my CHEATING husband on illicit encounters

222 replies

EmeliaLily · 08/07/2020 11:52

I posted a month ago about my suspicions that my husband is acting strange during covid, and constantly looking at his phone. I put it down to lockdown and all of us acting a bit differently at home without being able to socialise like before..

I feel so STUPID and distraught, at one point I even asked him outright and he just told me I was being silly. And all this time he's been on a married dating site - are you kidding me? I didn't even know these kind of places existed.

We've been together for 12 years, and I always thought our relationship is good, we're a family and have kids, I just don't know what to do at the moment.

He told me he's only been doing it because he's felt lonely being out of work, I mean what? Are you serious! He's tried to play it down and said he hasn't actually met anybody it was all just chatting to pass the time, I mean how would this make you feel?

Do I forgive him because it was all online and make him delete everything or should I be outraged? I mean if he's talking to women surely he'd want to meet some of them and maybe hasn't had any luck with corona. I just don't know right now, at the moment I've told him to stay with his brother while I sort my head out.

OP posts:
EmeliaLily · 21/07/2020 09:55

you are bound to be feeling sick about his friends and others knowing everything @Buggedandconfused

I think it's because it makes it feel like a double betrayal :(

OP posts:
EmeliaLily · 21/07/2020 09:56

Maybe your family thought they were protecting you?

good job they did there!!! It's so hard to believe people like his brother were in on it

OP posts:
EmeliaLily · 21/07/2020 09:57

@IveGotFrills I'll try and find it thanks! I know what is it with men! urgh

OP posts:
BumbleBeee69 · 21/07/2020 10:14

wow... you are an inspiration Lady 👑🎉

EmeliaLily · 21/07/2020 10:55

@BumbleBeee69 aww that is the sweetest

OP posts:
EmeliaLily · 21/07/2020 10:56

There's such a huge part of me that wants to name and shame all his friends too, to their wives etc. Is that bad of me? I recon there's actually more going on in this circle than originally transpires

OP posts:
yesterdaystotalsteps123 · 21/07/2020 11:38

I think that's really normal, but better to just leave them all to it. Focus on healing and play the long game. In a year you will have done a lot of recovery and he will still be the same person and whoever he ends up with he will cheat on because that's what they do and they choose that very shallow deceitful way of living. Just take the opportunity to cut all the dead wood from your life and surround yourself with people who have your and your kids' best interests at heart. It does get easier but it's not going to be an easy journey but it will be worth it for your new life

EmeliaLily · 14/08/2020 12:36

I thought I'd let you all know, that leaving my husband as the best decision I've ever made.

For anyone experiencing the same thing, please, please be aware there is a light at the end of the tunnel.

OP posts:
Sakurami · 14/08/2020 13:46

Great news op :)

ilikemethewayiam · 14/08/2020 13:55

Oh how lovely! How’s life been for you since you left? I’d love to hear the positives you’ve experienced since leaving him. I’m sure others who are wavering will benefit too.

Annonymiss123 · 14/08/2020 15:54

What a difference a month makes! Delighted to read your happy update @EmeliaLily. Smile

MrsPerfect12 · 14/08/2020 16:30

Great news!

thelistener · 14/08/2020 16:44

Mine was on Ashley Madison - the infamous Ashley godamn Madison- for unfilled married people ......... WTF

He had spent in the region of £500 in the first couple of months .....

we divorced 8 years ago and he married his -next victim- newest wife last weekend!
LTB he is lying maybe not about meeting someone but if he is keeping secrets, he has intent

billyt · 14/08/2020 17:03

the listener

as they say on here

you really need to......RTFT!

GracieLouFreebushh · 14/08/2020 17:59

Fab news OP!! Hopefully that will help inspire people in the same position in future Grin

heyday · 14/08/2020 18:10

I wonder just how many married men are on these sort of sites?? I did read that as many as 7 out of 10 men cheat and i think it was either 4 or 5 women out of 10 cheat! Doesn't give much hope for monogamous relationships does it? I guess some 'cheaters' don't consider it to be cheating if it's online or not an emotional attachment.

cataclysmiclife · 14/08/2020 18:29

Oh me too OP he's gone now and I'm actually a lot happier! Smile

WorldlyWise · 28/07/2022 03:15

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WorldlyWise · 28/07/2022 03:33

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Starlia · 28/07/2022 06:03

WTAF have I just read?

LumpyandBumps · 28/07/2022 07:00

Worldly Wise, but can’t read dates apparently. This thread is 2 years old.

ZOMBIE THREAD

MichaelMumsnet · 28/07/2022 07:02

Hmm. We've removed those posts and we'll close the thread in a mo.

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