Thoughts on men that like younger women

[namechangeagain12]

So I seem to come across a lot of blokes late 20's early 30's who like younger girls, between 19-21. I know we are only talking around 10 years age gap here but I think it's disgusting...

I remember when I was 19 at uni and my flat mate's 29 year old friend was trying to sleep with me - I thought he was weird as hell! I was never a immature 19 year old but still, 19 to me is still VERY young.

Is this totally normal? Am I being unreasonable here for judging a bloke for constantly liking younger girls photos? I appreciate these girls look late 20's but for some reason it freaks me out and puts me right off them.

Not sure what I'm asking here, just after a gentle discussion

So what age do you believe is acceptable for somebody to 'know themselves' enough to choose their partner?

catsandlavender I recently found a diary I kept when I was 18/19. My god it was embarrassing. I sort of recognise myself, but I was an absolute tool. It covers the months leading up to getting into the bad age gap relationship and the whole thing reads like a slow motion car crash. I had no idea how to handle male attention and it screams from every page.

I once saw a man with a very Percy look on his face staring at a teen in a short school skirt, in Tesco one day. I kept bumping into him all the way around and couldn't keep the disgust from my face. That's unacceptable.

Two grown adults who love each other fair enough. Some ugly richman using young women, nope.

It all depends, I suppose.

Damn autocorrect, pervy, not Percy.

Who keeps a diary at 18 😂😂no wonder it didnt work out

Oh Wolfgrrl.

@Wolfgirrl what age did you meet your partner at? and do you have kids together?

Met when I was mid 20s and him 40. We have a daughter who is nearly 1.

Were you together long before dd?

There's nothing wrong with men in the 30s liking younger girls

Yes I was with mine way before I was pregnant with my 2 kids

In cases where I’ve seen sometimes a younger woman will desperately try and confirm and justify men’s biological desire for younger women it has been when they have become involved with men who have left there older / same age partner to be with them . Is it I. Fact jealousy or fear of what the older woman offered that drives the younger woman to ‘defend ‘ her ground so strongly . Perhaps a jealousy of the ex .
Not saying that is the case here as wolfgirl hasn’t even mentioned her 40yr old man leaving a wife or ex to be with her but I have seen cases where some younger women become somewhat competitive and feel perhaps their youth is their trump card
Ideally women would band together , older women have all been younger . Many of us have daughters and other young women in our lives who we love dearly and want the beat for and you get women would realise that in a very short time they will be where we are . A society that learns to value women for way mode than their youth and fertility benefits all women and I do believe that it can happen

So what age do you believe is acceptable for somebody to 'know themselves' enough to choose their partner?

It depends. Unfortunately I know lots of people who are older who can't seem to choose a decent partner.

Theres a reason not many people are only with one person from young until death. One of them is that we change alot especially in our 20s.

Who keeps a diary at 18
Existing grandmother kept a diary every day, from being about 11. Reading them, after she died, was a revelation. Some days it was as simple as a list of what she did. Some days more. Some days things she had learned or felt.

She was married from 28 until she died at 92. To someone she met at 22. She was also a land girl, her husband (exhs grandfather) was also in the army and his letter were in the diaries. The diaries have been studied and used by museums and experts.

So it appears keeping a diary can be very useful and interesting for lots of people. They are obviously very valuable to the family, but also to other people.

She managed to keep a diary and have a functioning relationship. Who knew?

I don’t know Trevsadick, I don’t keep a diary anymore and I’m in a functional relationship now.

QED, I think.

I didnt see trevs say anywhwre that a diary was a requirement of a functional relationship.? Diaries or journals can be great self development tools or even just record keepers of ones experiences and personal growth . Whether or not one decides to keep one really has little to do with ones relationship success

I know Cakecup, I was teasing Wolfgrrl...

Sorry winter 😂yes retreading I realised ... my mistake . Too much coffee for me obviously

Yes and I was teasing Winter, looks like it fell flat though! Nice story about the war though

Is it I. Fact jealousy or fear of what the older woman offered that drives the younger woman to ‘defend ‘ her ground so strongly . Perhaps a jealousy of the ex

Well, you're defending yours pretty strongly arent you? I was criticised for using the word 'jealousy' but fine for you to use it apparently?

Well it looks like now we are onto labelling younger women as 'husband stealers' 🙄 the veneer of feminism is as thin as always, how depressing.

Much as you all want to, you cannot police the actions of adults. It is up to us to make our own mistakes in life and make our own choices. You laud the 'life experience' of older people as being a positive trait, yet want to deny younger people the same quality by preventing them from making their own choices (yes even when such choices turn out to be a mistake).

If you cannot see the irony in saying you promote womens' choices yet want them only to date men you deem to be suitable, despite not knowing any of their personal circumstances, we can't really have a discussion can we?

No ones labelling young women wolfgirl . Please stop getting so defensive . There are in fact men who leave their wives for younger women , just as there are in fact men who leave their wives for older women , fatter women , thinner women, perhaps even women who wear big purple floppy shoes ... who knows ... wow
The word ‘ Jealous ‘ please point me to where I personally said anything about you using the word jealous ?
As for you accusing everyone of trying to take away younger women choices , you’re sounding a little like the teenagers I hear of who complain everyone tries to control them . It seems your having trouble distinguishing the difference between people having alternative positions to yours and then wanting to ‘ control your life ‘ in fact every one I’ve read here doesn’t seem the least bit concerned about trying to destroy your relationship
You do realise other people can have different opinions and it doesn’t equate them trying to run your life , right ?
Wolfgirl ? Have you got good relationships with Any older women . Perhaps you could turn to one for a life guidance at this time. Something in your messages , the way you are so defensive perhaps and so determined to assert older women as unattractive makes me wonder if there’s more going on
Oh to be young and know everything again 😀

Before I’m accused of wanting to be young again and being jealous I thought I should point out that was tongue in cheek ;)

You're entitled to your opinions of course. But to try to enforce them as has been discussed with campaigns etc in the workplace, well that is trying to take away choices isn't it?

There are in fact men who leave their wives for younger women , just as there are in fact men who leave their wives for older women , fatter women , thinner women, perhaps even women who wear big purple floppy shoes

Yes I know men don't exclusively find younger women attractive, you point this out to me in every post.

Wolfgirl what campaigns in the workplace are you referring to . I believe I missed something there .
And yes just like I’d id hope they don’t find girls from age 9 attractive as per your biology theory !

I’m not aware of any campaigns to prevent age gap relationships in the workplace ? But perhaps I missed some posts

There was a post further back about increasing awareness in workplaces and universities which I found intrusive and frankly abhorrent. Not to mention patronising and unenforceable.

I think you all have the wrong impression of me as being some insecure subservient airhead, enjoying my moment in the sun as a young woman by putting down older women. This simply is not true.

I'm going to be 30 in a couple of years, my most attractive days (on paper, I feel more confident the older I get) are behind me, I have a young daughter who I want to ensure has high expectations of future relationships. I know many very very unattractive young women, and some beautiful and charismatic 'older' women. I know many older women dont lack for attention.

However, I do think it is a fact of life that most men find younger women more physically attractive, at least just to look at. As has been previously mentioned, their personality (or lack of) can soon override that attraction, and in terms of a sustainable relationship most men would probably prefer a woman closer to their own age.

The likes of Leonardo de Caprio etc to me are the 'creepy' type of older men. They serially date younger women, dump them after a few years to move on to an even younger counterpart. This isnt a good example of a healthy relationship and I entirely disapprove. There is no respect.

However for every Leonardo there is a relationship like mine, simply just two people that want to be together. And some of the language used about men like my DP is offensive and untrue.

Before meeting him, like I said I only dated men my own age. My first relationship was abusive looking back - he confiscated my money, banned me from seeing or even talking to certain friends, and generally made my life miserable. He was a year younger than me.

My sisters saw me at my most down when I was with him, and are over the moon at how my life has changed with current DP. I find it really hard that strangers on the internet are suggesting campaigns for me to date people like my ex over my current DP.

Hope that clears a few things up.