Creepy things that males have said to you in any context.

[NoMoreDickheads]

One I saw a couple of times a while back- he seemed a nice guy so IDK why he came out with this.

Me:- I don't like X (sexual act) it just makes me feel ticklish.

Him:- I'm going to make you laugh and laugh.

!!!
Luckily he didn't go on to try the thing. Brr!

75 year old bloke from a musical group I was in asked if I wanted to have sex with him. I was 35 at the time.
I said no, thank you.
He said "If you're bothered about what my old body looks like we can do it with the lights off".
I said no, thank you.
He then said "Well I ask lots of people to have sex with me and most of them do. There's no harm in asking"

@Vretz - what the fuck??? A thread bashing men?? Ermmmm no I think they bring it on themselves when they act like they do. I was going to post a polite reply about how men get off on the power imbalance of preying on young girls and that's why a lot of this stuff happens to girls in their teens (true). But fuck it, men are perverted all the time, no matter how old a woman is. Some of them don't even bother to hide it. Sorry, am I man bashing? Are you a bloke Vretz?

I was recently back from a holiday and was in a lift alone with one of the partners at work who was a bit of a letch. He pulled my top open a bit and said "does that tan go all over?"

How many of these are in the last 2-3 years...? Just feels like a thread of bashing men based on events from 2000s, 90s and 80s! The 90s are over 20yrs ago!

It's almost as if MN main user demographic isn't teenagers and young women but...I know this sounds crazy...women who are mums! Which, if I can do the maths (as a woman of course it's hard) means that when people posting here were young (ie at their weakest, most innocent, most easily targeted age) in the 80s, 90s and 00s.

The best thing about threads is you don't have to read them if you don't want to.

How many of these are in the last 2-3 years...? Just feels like a thread of bashing men based on events from 2000s, 90s and 80s! The 90s are over 20yrs ago!

Mine in the OP was from last year.

Women, please feel free to share your experiences from whatever year you like- don't feel it has to be recent, ignore this MRA completely. In fact, you could post older ones if you like.

I understand why things from childhood/early womanhood can seem even more shocking as they're inappropriate or taking advantage of vulnerability etc.

Luckily I wasn't an attractive child so I didn't knowingly get much hassle when young. But I didn't develop that 'spider sense' of being creeped out until quite late in life, so maybe stuff was happening and I wasn't aware of it.

The first slightly creepy incident was ending up being got off with by a friend's brother when I was 15 and he was 16. I was a very innocent 15 so I still consider it abuse. I don't remember how I ended up in his room or how it ended up happening (I wasn't drunk or anything, I just don't recall those details, which I find strange.) We had a kiss and he groped me (weird 'kneading' technique he had.) I knew afterwards that just having sex with him wasn't what I wanted, but seemed to be what he wanted. I said to my friend 'Tell Stephen maybe we could meet up for a walk in the park' as in I wasn't interested in what he was clearly just after. He said to her that he didn't think I knew the score and that he just wanted to 'make love' to me (ha!)

The first overtly creepy incidents I remember were from a boyfriend I had when I was 16/17. One thing he'd do is if I was standing in his room and we were hugging, there was a full length mirror and he would lift my buttocks up in such a way as he could see my bumhole. (This was in 1993 so there wasn't even the excuse of much porn.) It felt very degrading.

Another time- he managed to get an erection briefly (usually his psychological issues prevented it) and his response to getting an erection was to say 'I could rape you now.'

I wasn't an attractive child

Well, you know what I mean! Maybe I mean I wasn't cute or didn't look like I was going to be pretty.

The friend's brother didn't even really like me in any way, it was just opportunistic.

Here's one from last year, MRA, hth.
A cycle club, of men, stopped at a countryside cafe, I was sitting outside at a table with a 4 year old girl who has curly very blonde hair and blue eyes.
Her Mum was inside buying coffees.

Three of the men, in their late 40's, told me how beautiful she was. They then had a discussion amongst themselves about what a stunner she will be when she is older.

One of them then told me to keep an eye on her, as with looks like that, I'd been in for a lot of bother in a few years, what with the fellahs being after her like flies.

A couple of months later, ( so last year) a shopkeeper tried to take her from me in a shop, and said that he wanted to show her the chocolate behind the counter.

He came up behind us while we were looking at the comics, stroked her neck, told her how beautiful she was, and then tried to pick her up.

I kicked off.

JackFeracki - Eww and eek! xxx

"How many of these are in the last 2-3 years...? Just feels like a thread of bashing men based on events from 2000s, 90s and 80s! The 90s are over 20yrs ago!"

Yes, the poor helpless men should not be held to account for anything before 2001.

And lol at the thought that creepy behaviour magically stopped 20 years ago! Have you read any news in the last couple of years?

Mine (from 2017 if it's relevant): a man by the station telling me and a teenage female student "I want to fuck both of you together". He got an earful from me but the student was shaken.

Friend of a friend in the pub: "you've got great child bearing hips but not much up too to feed them with." I was 18 and weighed 8 stone. Maybe his comment subconsciously affected my breastfeeding determination as I fed all 3 dc until 15 months, 3.5 years, and 4.5 years. He was a twat.

Guy I was going on a second date with turned up at my flat one hour early and handed me a bright red lipstick and matching nail varnish and told me I had to wear them and that he would wait outside while I got ready. He then stood over the road looking up at my window.
I was gobsmacked.
Three hours later he left.

At a school friend's house party, we were 14/15, I was drinking an alcopop. Her dad whispered in my ear "I like watching you drink from that bottle, you look like you're giving a blow job"

Aged 21 walking down the street - “If I was your dad I’d still be bathing you”. He was certainly old enough to be my dad (not envy)

I was nearly 11 years old in 1977. Very much a tomboy, always in jeans, horse riding, climbing trees, making dens, you know the kind of thing. I had two barely discernable swellings where my breasts would eventually be, nowhere near ready for a bra and hadn't started my periods.
I would go to my best friends house and we would go for a ride then hang out at her house. She had a sister who was ten years older than her with a boyfriend who was around 27/28. On this particular day I was wearing my favourite t-shirt; it had the head of a palomino pony on it. It was a bit tight as I'd grown in the past six months.
Friend and I were hanging out in the yard having a cold drink, when the boyfriend opened the window and called us over. We both went. He looked straight at my chest in a smirky way and said to me 'Can I stroke your horse?' His tone was so letchy and creepy and I was shocked. I felt sick. An adult had never behaved like with me and I felt awful. I never wore the t shirt again and soon after I stopped going to see my friend. I was scared he would be there and act that way with me again.

What is saddening is how I read these and think, oh, yeah, I had that too, but would never have thought to do or say anything about it as a child/teen/young woman. We just normalised and smoothed things over, laughed, excused and avoided those situations if we could.
I put up with things as a young woman that would have those male teachers/lecturers/managers/coworkers in court if they happened and were reported now. Careers would be over. But we just shrugged and moved on.
I am glad that we do not expect young women to undergo the same treatment now, even though I realise it still happens, it is known to not be acceptable.

Loads of creepy things said throughout the 80’s and 90’s and mostly accepted at that time, it’s only now looking back I can see that it was not right. One thing that has stuck as creepy was about 03 when a “BF” proudly told me that he was excellent at strangling his partners to the “point” and knowing when to stop before rendering them unconscious when having sex. He was a few years younger than me and I was pretty shocked at him thinking this was acceptable and his partners allowing him to do it!

This is a horrible horrible read, I could also add loads, as could every woman. I don’t think you could find a woman alive that has not experienced some degree of sexual harassment from men in her life, even now, although I vainly hope that is changing. I think reading accounts like these should be part of some mandatory male training course in how to not be a dickhead.

Fortunately not all men in the world are behaving like this, but the ones who don’t can still benefit from understanding what women experience and looking for ways to call it out in other men.

I still don't find it easy to respond assertively when men are crap or give me the creeps. Don't know if I ever do as much as I should; maybe I manage it a little by messenger.

As well as creepiness, it's also disrespecting/disparaging comments or those that indicate a lack of regard that are not ok and I feel unable to respond to, at least at first or in the flesh.

A middle aged customer (who did admittedly look very dodgy) asked me a question and I said I’d need to work the answer out on a piece of paper. He looked at me grinning, looked me up and down and said ‘you could just do it orally’ and winked. I was 15

'I would lay you like a carpet'. Creepy much older colleague when I was about 22.

Worked as a waitress when I was 15. Middle aged regular grabbed my arm to ask for a drink then said "wow your skin is so soft. Can you hang around a minute so I can rub your arm? There's a tenner in it for you"
I let him cause I was a stupid skint teenager, then got someone else to take over the table

@cuddlypenguins Eek! That reminds me of another one. A previous tenant had painted the bath with normal magnolia paint. (?) It would peel off as I had a bath, you could feel the weird chemicals stinging your skin.

A bloke from the council came round to look at it. If you've ever had a council flat you'll know how hard it can be to do any major work (they were thinking they'd have to consider replacing the bath.)

To try and get them to do it I happened to say 'I have very sensitive skin.' The council bloke said 'Oh, I can tell' and started rubbing his hands up and down my arms. (!)

I have a medical condition (bipolar) and also because my mum disliked confrontation I find it very hard to be assertive.

Then the bloke was saying 'let me have a look at your tattoos.' I honestly was not really into any of this at any time, I just find it hard to be assertive and say something isn't ok. One of the tattoos is on my lower back. The bloke was looking at it and then going 'bend over, bend over some more, bend over some more.'

He asked for my number and said he might come back that night. IDK if he rang but I did manage to avoid him coming back.

This was 2 years ago BTW and I was 41. I find a lot of men will be creepy. He took advantage of the fact I live alone.

Age 18 working behind a bar in a remote country pub. Regular said, I bet your nipples are like bin lids until you're horny or cold.

Speechless.

I'd really like to think there has been a shift in behaviour but when I speak to my female friends who are OLD, they get so many unwanted dick pics or vile messages that I'm just worried that these sleazy types have just become better at hiding :(

Once when I was 15 , I was approached by a 30+ man in the early evening on my way back home, who was determined to try and get me to 'go for a run' in the local park with him. It was sunset/getting dark and the park was big enough that you could easily not be seen. I made my excuses and left quickly.

2 years ago I was working in retail and a male customer I was helping on the shop floor promptly leaned towards my neck sniffed me loudly and said ' you smell nice' 🤮 . I literally speed walked of the shop floor and hid in the stock room till he left.