I’m new to this..
So my boyfriend of a year and a half has a 5 year old son. I moved in with him for lockdown.
Both being off work he’s seen a lot more of his son. Which I understand. Me and his son have always got on but he is an extremely active child. He’ll wake at 6 and go to bed at 9 and every second he demands your attention. He’s also repetitive so I find it quite tiring and monotonous. As soon as he starts playing football he wants to know what we’re playing next. If I don’t cheer him he shouts at me. If I score a goal he calls me rubbish and pulls my clothes and has punched me. He’s bossy. I have to watch him ride his bike. If my partner kisses me he says well you haven’t kissed me. Or hugs etc. I try not to be touchy feeling around him and I always put the child first. I don’t get much peace. He even follows me in the toilet.
When daddy isn’t around he will kick things. I ask him not to but he doesn’t listen. He has even punched his own face. I daren’t say anything to my partner as he isn’t the easiest to communicate.
The school recently called my partner and his ex because his son punched a boy. But my partner still says it wasn’t his fault, the other boy was a bully.
Anyway, it came up in conversation I said maybe they shouldn’t play fight as that’s why he’s aggressive. My partner didn’t like the comment. Then we he spoke about when he was seeing his son next, and planning where he wants to take him on holiday etc I just said, I think couple time is important too. We’ve never had a couple holiday. Only a weekend away. He never asks what I want to do. The only time we eat out etc or go somewhere is the days he has his son. Call me old fashioned but a little romance wouldn’t go amiss and also it would be nice to know he appreciates the time and effort I dedicate to his child. He flipped his lid saying, it’s my son and stormed off. I didn’t mean that. I meant the time he doesn’t see him, can we not have some quality time. It escalated to an argument. I said you never do anything for me. You’re obsessed with your son and I’m bored of playing football, rugby, fighting, I’m not a bloke.
He flipped again. He ended it. Threw all of my stuff out on the landing and I had to leave. We haven’t spoken since. He blocked me so I can’t contact him to explain. Unless I drive there which I’m not strong enough to do yet as I’m upset. It’s the first time I’ve get shouted back at him.
I’ve recently lost my dad to an illness and my mum is self isolating so I’ve had a lot on my mind.
Maybe I’ve just needed space and quiet time to deal with it and being around too much noise etc has gotten on top of me? And that’s how I reacted that way.
Has anyone else done anything similar? Am I bad for saying these things? Does it warrant ending the relationship? Or something we could discuss?
I’d appreciate any advice. Thanks.