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Original poster

Let's sing our husbands praises

223 replies

Gratitudeiseverything · 20/04/2020 09:10

Good morning,

I've read so many posts on here about how their DH is driving them crazy.

But let's take a moment to sing our praises for all the amazing things our husbands do.

My husband has been waking up every morning to make the kids breakfast and allowing me to have a lay in!

He's been making us all delicious treats like chocolate crepes and other goodies to randomly make us smile. He constantly thinks about my comfort, as I'm working from home and he currently isn't due to the virus. He even made me dinner last night and usually I would be the one doing most of the work during a normal week as I work from home and he works into the late evening with his work. He also has been great with the kids, helping with their homework, making sure they are happy and having fun.

He is truly amazing! Feeling very grateful 🙌

What are you grateful for?

OP posts:
SandyY2K · 20/04/2020 22:34

@Gratitudeiseverything

Someone will always be offended....don't worry.

It's just how many take offence or feel jealous about ppl posting pics of their kids in the garden, because they haven't got one.

Or ppl jealous of furloughed colleagues seemingly having fun, yet they're still working.

It sounds like ppl only want to be full of doom and gloom, because they are where they are in their relationships.

Original poster
Gratitudeiseverything · 21/04/2020 00:14

Thank you @SandyY2K - it really does seem that way!

OP posts:
bingowingsmcgee · 21/04/2020 00:25

My dh is not a modern man. He's a provider first and foremost, which doesn't suit everyone, but I don't think I'm a modern woman, so 🤷🏼‍♀️ He makes the brews sometimes, makes sure we're ok financially and he's generally cheery and stoic. That'll do me tbh. I couldn't be arsed being wined and dined.

Orangers · 21/04/2020 07:28

What a nice thread.

Mine is an absolutely lovely man. Reliable to a fault. Loves me and the children very much. Keeps the place tidy and clean together with me. Always has a minute for a little hug in the kitchen. Eats absolutely everything (not fussy). Interested in lots of things. Laughs his head off at candid camera. Love you sweetie.

PegasusReturns · 21/04/2020 08:02

Not offended but this is tone deaf on the relationships board.

I have a DH who is an equal partner, shares the childcare and housework and is a decent human being. But I’m not going to sing his praises for doing the laundry or taking our DC out for a bike ride Hmm that’s to be expected.

Treatedlikeamaid · 21/04/2020 08:18

Hi, thanks for this thread. I’m very pleased for you all, and I suddenly realised I am currently learning what ‘normal,’ is.
Not that I’m abused or anything, but I’m shocked that I’m jealous!

Treatedlikeamaid · 21/04/2020 08:27
  • keep posting! This is a real eye opener!
Womenwotlunch · 21/04/2020 08:39

As far as I was concerned this thread is called ‘Relationships’. Therefore one should be able to write about positive and negative experiences.
I knew when Op started the thread, that there would be posters who would have issues with the positivity. Some people have fantastic’ relationships’ and want to talk about them. Leave them be FFS

category12 · 21/04/2020 08:41

I know what this thread reminds me of: those Fb memes of "let's flood Facebook with positivity!!!! Post a picture of your [self, dog, beach, wedding day, whatever]!!!!"

Womenwotlunch · 21/04/2020 09:08

Also, there is a thread about people having extramarital affairs. This could be a trigger for those whose partners have cheated. However, those having the affairs are entitled to have a place to talk about their experiences
In the same way as those in great relationships should be free to discuss them

WaterIsWide · 21/04/2020 09:11

@Ribwort:

As far as I was concerned this thread is called ‘Relationships’. Therefore one should be able to write about positive and negative experiences.
I knew when Op started the thread, that there would be posters who would have issues with the positivity. Some people have fantastic’ relationships’ and want to talk about them. Leave them be FFS

Misogyny ? The woman hating from other women is as astounding and prevalent as the double standards practiced here. You too could work on your misogyny be it internalised or externalised or lets just call it spite.

The posters who have a problem with this thread and the positive remarks made by people who are in a loving relationship are quite telling.

Why do so many people just want to pour bile on this thread ? It's in the wrong place ? Really ? I don't see MNHQ in any hurry to move it.

zaffa · 21/04/2020 09:19

Aaaah so lovely to read all your stories! My husband is working from home whilst I'm on mat leave and my step son is also quarantined with us indefinitely so it's a busy house. But every day, he finds time to take the baby so I can laze in the bath, brings me coffee to do so and gives me a proper break. In between home schooling an 11 year old and working! He also gets up at the night feed to sort the bottle out so I can comfort the 0-100 baby that wants her bottle as soon as she opens her eyes 👀

He's great in other ways, but watching him with our daughter reminds me why I love him so much

Beerincomechampagnetastes · 21/04/2020 09:37

This thread has had the opposite effect on me that it has had for many of you posting.
I don’t find it uplifting. I find it incredibly upsetting that so many of you don’t realise that you don’t need to be so ‘grateful’.

Unwittingly many of you have exposed yourself in a way that you may not even be aware of.

This board will be here for you when you realise Flowers

Chiyo666 · 21/04/2020 09:45

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

wildflowersandweeds · 21/04/2020 09:57

@Beerincomechampagnetastes or perhaps people have realised that being grateful for what you have brings more happiness than bashing it as 'just what is expected'? I've a great husband, and I'm grateful for him. I thank him when he washes the dishes or gets up in the night with the kids. He has a great wife who he is grateful for. He thanks me when I wash the dishes or get up in the night with the kids. We are grateful for each other, and while I am not the sort to go posting about it on fb, I think that a lot of posters are being unkind to the OP. She posted about her relationship in relationships and the title made it very clear what tone it was.
This whole 'you can't say good things about a man because they should just be doing it anyway' is the type of toxic feminism that makes so many women say they're not feminists. And I say that as a feminist with a feminist husband. There is nothing wrong with appreciating what other people do, and no need to pull other women down. Hmm

Beerincomechampagnetastes · 21/04/2020 10:10

Confused at calling me a toxic feminist and accusing me of pulling other women down wildflower.

Perhaps you should reread my post and then reread your own and then take some time to reflect on what I’ve said in comparison to what you have.

Treatedlikeamaid · 21/04/2020 10:15

Oh good grief, ladies! Behave

justkeeprunning5 · 21/04/2020 10:22

This is a nice thread Smile. I’m nearing the end of the first trimester of pregnancy after a long infertility journey that ended up with us needing IVF and my husband has been an absolute angel throughout. Supportive of me throughout the treatment, shouldered so much of the stress (Believe me there was a lot of that, and buckets of tears) and did all he could to help around the house. He is now cooking and cleaning most days so I can get as much rest as possible. I hope to have the energy to pull my weight soon!

In return I’m not a nag when he goes out drinking with the boys and I find him on the sofa with a half eaten kebab the next day Wink. Am supportive of his hobbies, Get on with his friends & family as he does with mine etc. The way relationships should be.

When I read some of the negative threads on here, boy do I feel very lucky.

category12 · 21/04/2020 10:31

You kinda are "pulling your weight" by growing that baby, tho, surely? Congratulations BTW.

I think it's kind of odd as it seems rather like you think of the pregnancy as a side project of your own Grin , instead of something he has equal skin in the game with. It's his kid, it's extra responsibility/work/emotional energy for both of you on top of the norm.

Trexical · 21/04/2020 11:13

@Gratitudeiseverything I've read this thread with interest as someone who is grateful for just getting out of bed in the morning!

I do however see it as odd that many posters are celebrating men for doing what most reasonable, empathetic and conscious people would consider the norm. Let me put it another way, would a men's board feature posters exhilarated that their wives wash the dishes and take the kids to school? I doubt it. We all know there are great men out there ( just look at the selfless male drs in the nhs working on the front line) but I find it quite sad that you feel the need to celebrate in a man what would be considered default behaviour in a woman.

BertiesLanding · 21/04/2020 11:33

@Beerincomechampagnetastes - I agree with your post, and I know you'll get quite a backlash from it. Which makes me agree with it more.

NeverBeenLoved · 21/04/2020 11:49

If people don't want to read about others 'singing their husband's praises', they don't need to open or read it.

Whilst I agree that most of it should be 'normal' and not 'praiseworthy', and I do have a bit of an eye roll when I see women almost deifying fairly mundane stuff, if people want to count their blessings and appreciate what they've got, let them.

There's no need to piss on someone else's chips just because yours are soggy.

ravenmum · 21/04/2020 12:03

I am grateful that I divorced him before this happened, as he would have been really irritating to live with in this situation 😂

I think there's a place on this board for describing men who meet the basic standards in a relationship that you would expect from either sex. Considering the total crap that people describe putting up with on a daily basis. Some people clearly do need to see what the minimum standards are. To make that very clear for such readers, I think it's also worth pointing out that those are the minimum standards.

DogWhelk · 21/04/2020 12:03

There's no need to piss on someone else's chips just because yours are soggy.

If we're going with this metaphor, it appears to be chiefly women whose chips are reasonably crispy who are pointing out that deifying men for behaving like responsible fellow-parents and housemates smacks of internalised misogyny, sexual double standards and pathetically low expectations.

@Beerincomechampagnetastes's post is entirely right. As is @Trexical:

I do however see it as odd that many posters are celebrating men for doing what most reasonable, empathetic and conscious people would consider the norm. Let me put it another way, would a men's board feature posters exhilarated that their wives wash the dishes and take the kids to school? I doubt it. We all know there are great men out there ( just look at the selfless male drs in the nhs working on the front line) but I find it quite sad that you feel the need to celebrate in a man what would be considered default behaviour in a woman.

Trexical · 21/04/2020 12:04

No one is missing on anyone's chips and I think its right this thread is on the relationships board of only to highlight how far we as women still need to go...if someone is truly exceptional whatever sex then I applaud them but when its " I'm pregnant and tired and my husband looks after me" it's kind of like our bars are way too low and it's no wonder women put up with crap if we regard said behaviour as worthy of a whole thread!