Dating Thread 187 - Love in the Time of Corona

[JeSuisPrest]

The Rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. Know your worth.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future 14. OLD can get very time consuming. Keep doing other activities you enjoy.

Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item.

@Thisisnotwhatiwant - Tinder are allowing free use of passport (where you can pretend to be in another location). Fuck knows why when you consider the opportunity afforded to scammers (at least make them pay!). So at the moment so he's probably hopping between places virtually.

@Jane1978xx - GPS is separate on phones. If it's enabled it won't lie.

@Thisisnotwhatiwant I think people can "set" their location at the moment, but possibly is work wifi being routed via the corporate network.

@HairyArsedMan

Yeah, actually this is true. But you don't need GPS for "coarse" location services. Certainly, on Android, it will use a map of local wifi Ids that it has verified using other people's phones coupled with known phone masts. So forget what I said regarding corporate LAN. I don't think it will use IP address.

@HairyArsedMan my phone defo used to think it was in London 🤷🏼‍♀️. Maybe that’s if gps is off. I thought my luck was in when loads more people appeared

Gosh the thread is galloping along today after a quieter few days. I actually laughed out loud at some of the exchanges. FWIW I find despite differing opinions most people on here are genuine in their support of each other and have offered really good and helpful advice when asked about how best to navigate the pitfalls of OLD. And have been there to encourage others when we're feeling a bit lost or fed up when things appear to be going pear shaped.

unambiguousbeard hope you feel better soon. Bed and a takeaway sounds perfect. Look after yourself

Jane1978xx I imagine Mr this isn't working/dick pic still has no clue why he's having no success.

Msyoganidra32 I've never had much luck with POF. I prefer tinder.
A lot of the time it depends on where you live.

@Jane1978xx Yeah, I don't doubt it - it will depend on whether you've allowed GPS to be used at the app level or within the phone in general, and whether it's recently got a signal. It can be laggy but not around 6000km of laggy ! Otherwise location will be based on a lot of guess work related to wifi and your mobile data connection as @MrDrummer says.

Oh yeah and a +1 from me for Blinded By The Light mentioned upthread. I don't even like Bruce Springsteen but it all seems to work within the film.

Just been announced that the lockdown has been extended for another 3 weeks. I expected it but still disappointed. Won't get to spend my birthday with Mr Army this year. Oh well, we will just have to celebrate when we can see each other again.
Now to come up with a list of things to keep me busy with for the next 3 weeks. It gives me more time to time up and lose some more weight before I see him again

@Onesmallstep67

It's 'cos I am back. The place is so dull without me!

@Dancerinthemoonlight. 3 more weeks is awful. I’m really struggling. I’m still chatting to my iron, and we still have things to talk about, but I worry about another 3 weeks of this at least. I’ve just found my dating mojo, and I’m well peeved that my mojo is being denied it’s needs 😂

There seems to be some hypocrisy on here - I was shot down by a couple of days ago for asking if my live alone partner an d I could meet up - however Sunshine (not a pop at you BTW) has someone in her household who is not normally there - not a word - just saying.

howeverSunshine(not a pop at you BTW)

Of course it's not a pop. Jog on. @CrossMyBoundariesAtYourPeril

JeSuisPrest no it actually wasn’t - it’s just a couple on here were quite aggressive in reply to my post but ok with Sunshines - just wondered why ?

Without getting drawn in, Sunshine had the father of her children round and he and her and kids are essentially one household so it's different rules.

Christ, it's a sad situation when someone has to keep popping up with (passive) aggressive messages.

@unambiguousbeard I hope you feel better soon.

I had a bit of a MN and FB detox yesterday as the hysteria was getting to me. I'm hardly sleeping and had an ocular migraine this morning so I'm investing the extra two hours a day (week days) I get now I'm WFH in more self care. I workout twice a day (one session being yoga or Pilates) have a long walk and meditate. I don't really drink, but I'm trying to eat less chocolate! I wear make up every day because of Zoom! I don't posess PJs so I dress properly everyday as it really helps my MH. I'm just popping on to see how everyone is, then will go back to avoiding MN 😂

At least another 3 weeks ☹️ And I’ve already done 4 weeks without seeing another adult human apart from the ASDA man 😬. Wouldn’t be so bad If he was fit. I’m just going to go into auto pilot now for 3 weeks. It’s been 4 weeks since kids were last in school and that seems to have flown.

@Crossmyboundaires you asked and @Sunshineandflipflops just said she’d done it. Tbh neither thing follows the rules but personally I don’t care what other people do anymore I am only bothered about me and my daugher. My parents are safe and follow the rules and anyone else it’s their own lookout. I’ve know 3 people who’ve died this week unfortunately

@CrossMyBoundariesAtYourPeril as @SortingItOut said, I had the father of my children round for dinner. He was here anyway bringing our children home so he just stayed an hour longer. As many split families are doing at the moment, we are acting as one household so if one of us comes down with symptoms we all self isolate.
If it wasn’t for our children then no, of course he wouldn’t have come for dinner, just as if my bf wasn’t here anyway at the moment I wouldn’t be seeing him either.

I didn’t ask if it was ok, I’m quite capable of making that decision for myself.

Although if I felt I had to ask a bunch of strangers if it was ok (sorry everyone, meant with affection), then I would probably realise that it wasn’t.

Sortingitout not passive/aggressive at all - just asking while I’ll got shot down for getting together with my partner, who both live alone, with no contact with anyone else, while Sunshine was able to mix two households together - they are not one as they can hand over children without eating a meal together - just confused ?

Yeah we are doing the same @Sunshineandflipflops and sharing food as we discuss parenting issues and plans. Neither of us is connected to any other networks.

Yes we can, and we do every other time, however it was Easter Sunday, he was here anyway (he comes in when he brings the children back as we have never done the ‘drop and run’ thing and he brings their stuff in, which he has touched so staying another hour and eating with his kids really wasn’t going to increase anyone’s risks from the norm. Meeting up with your bf who you don’t live with or I assume share children with is not the same thing as you have no reason to do so.

But then what you do is none of my business and for that reason I wouldn’t comment or raise an issue with it.

We do the same. ExH comes in for a bit at changeover and stayed for Easter lunch. One household across two houses. Although it's not great I'd prefer not to see him but we both need a bit of adult convo.

Sunshine yes is it our norm - we don’t see our families at the moment as we both have grandchildren - the only people we see are ourselves - we live alone - it’s just the two of us and we do not invite anyone, regardless of who they are, into our space so I’m struggling with the double standards here. I know you didn’t ask for opinions and I did, however, the nastiness that I got from some made wonder! I think you are doing the right thing as I believe, am I

I have stopped commenting on what others do in regards of seeing people/not seeing people in lockdown. I'm now focusing on me and getting through how ever many weeks are left. Hopefully it doesn't get extended further.
I know one person an old iron that didn't even get to a date who has had covid-19. He is a mental health worker but was using the 'key worker' as an excuse to go round and see friends, have his partner over etc. I know this because he offered to come round and see me when I was struggling at the beginning saying he was allowed round peoples houses as he is a key worker.
Need to find things to do to fill the next 3 weeks. Got a blood donation booked in but not sure what else to do.