Dating thread 182 - keeping our irons warm by the fireplace

[saltysally]

The Rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. Know your worth.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future

Link to Info on Dating Websites & Apps www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3514717-List-of-Dating-Site-Info-Dating-Thread

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Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item.

Yes that's the time the loneliness really hits. I get that @unambiguousbeard

Well he's not messaged back- he was telling me about his line of work which sounds interesting to say the least... offputting though.

I just cannot be bothered. I'm gutted, it's my child free weekend too @Undecidedsofa, it's shit being cancelled on or having nothing to do. But it's too last minute to bother now, I'm knackered and cba to get ready. There was another guy who I was talking to but unless he wants to come to my local I cba.

I really want to meet Mr Cheekbones.

Ive asked him @shitwithsugaron- he's a bit slow to reply but we've said about next Thursday maybe....😊

A new iron now- mr mountain let's call him. He's gorgeous! But gone skiing for a week! Messaging me relentlessly on Snapchat though

Slightly random question but around Feb of last year someone posted a link to some stunning lingerie. It was fairly pricey and wasn't a known brand or site. The site had a few sex gifts of some type and I can't remember them either. There was definitely different scents or tastes of whatever this thing was. Does anyone remember?

@shitwithsugaron I'm losing track of people- I've got several conversations on the go.

Mr Mountain has just been the past couple of days. Mr Cheekbones I've been speaking to for a while... those I'd say are proper irons atm.

I've not heard from Mr Spanners for a while, nor Mr Wings

I completely forgot about another one that I was supposed to be seeing tonight!

Mr Posh. He's cancelled on me anyway. It's probably no bad thing- I just can't do posh

@shitwithsugaron I forget half of them and then they pop up again 😂

The thing is it seems to be you need loads and loads of irons to maximise the chance of actually going on a date! So many seem to fall through

Thing is @shitwithsugaron I don't really think it is possible to have an online connection, I don't believe you can really tell til you meet someone in person. I mean it's good when the conversation is going well online but it can be so different in person. I don't like to feel invested in any way prior to meeting anyone.

I see it as a numbers game, the more on the go the better the chances! 😂 I think I also have a fear of 'settling'- this is why for me I want that strong chemistry in person, that feeling, because if I don't get it I instantly think they'll be someone better for me.

I'm weird though 😂

I talked to someone for months and met them in person and instantly I didn’t fancy them at all and found them really boring. That was my first old date. 2nd old date within 2 mins I wanted to rip his clothes off 🤷🏼‍♀️. And the rest is history and it’s been a few months now. So really I don’t have much experience in this old business really and those dates were about 2 weeks apart.

Leave im desperate for you to meet Mr Cheekbones, he sounds like my MrY 😜 such a handsome, chiselled face.
Sorry to those feeling the loneliness. I have a good network but the worse I feel, the more I withdraw from it which is daft.

Oh and so much for being better at accepting compliments. A friend said how well I looked today and that she loved my jacket. I laughed and said I'd brushed my hair and something about how cheap the jacket was needs more work!

On my way to date 5 with Mr Joiner, he's making me dinner 🍽

@dancemom enjoy your date this evening!

Good luck to anyone else on dates as well 🍀

@KeepCalmCarryOhFuckIt thing is he is just waaaaaay too good looking for me. I'm average and he's godlike tbh 😂 his bone structure is phenomenal, he's got these gorgeous full lips too..... he is lush and seems a really nice guy as well. I just wouldn't feel comfortable around him, I already have issues about my appearance and I would feel like some gruesome hag next to him 😂

Mr Music and I just talked for 3.5 hours. This is crazy.

But we are both cautious about pacing this but also excited..

Ah @saltysally that's nice!

We have so much in common. Nothing has ever felt so meant to be before.

@saltysally that's lovely, 💕

@saltysally dont tell me the thread miss unavailable is getting the feels!

@saltysally 🤞 when are you meeting?

I have a question about care/love/expressions of affection.

I'm pretty non-demonstrative and also very independent. I'm not interested in someone caring for me in a "looking after" kind of way, but I do want more than just superficial interaction and sex. How do I manage expectations in a relationship? I mean, I don't want someone to come and put shelves up for me etc. but I do want someone to care that there's loads of stressful shit in my life.

My ex was EA and I realized that I have no idea what a "normal" level of care or affection is.

Is it possible to learn how to give/received care/love? This might all seem a bit wierd, but I think it's at the core of why I'm having wobbles about MrN. There's nothing tangible wrong, lots in common, we have fun together, enough sex and it's still getting better each time. But I feel like there's a bit missing.

I hope everyone who is dating this weekend is having a good time.