Ex dp, ds, fake name, extra kids, second thread

[Fedupofitnow123]

Thank you for your continued support, I'm starting this thread regarding the impending court hearing tomorrow, if someone could link my previous thread that would ne highly appreciated!

Also, of course, "He is still your Daddy and he did some lovely things and I know you had nice times as well as upsetting times"

Sorry, OP, I have thought about that post and suspect I am sounding patronising and bossy.

@blouseandskirt sorry to not reply sooner, I've developed a little bit of anxiety facing anything to do with the situation and am struggling to face it all!

I've been speaking with ds about why we left and even he said today "we weren't allowed to show our emotions were we?" So we're very open, he seems ok most days and is really happy here, we've had a really good weekend! I asked how he feels when he talks about our situation and he put his thumbs up, so I'm supposing it's helpful for him.

Slight problem with solicitor not responding to me atm so that's a worry but I also feel like I can't face ringing them!

You have a great relationship with you Ds and he sounds so confident in his emotions and ability to talk about things.

No pressure re replying to thread, no obligation. It’s such an overwhelming situation.

Glad you had a nice weekend

What a wonderful little boy you have . Stay strong .

How are you doing?

Gosh, how are you doing OP?

I've been lurking for a long, long time bit have been supporting you in spirit.

You are incredibly strong. You don't feel it right now - but when you look back at all this, you will see your strength shining through.

I'm ok, thank you, ds is doing really well too, his behaviour is improving since we've been away, he's less argumentative and more respectful so that's a big positive!

We're taking each day as it comes! Still no response from my solicitor!

What are you waiting for your solicitor to do atm? Is it urgent?

@blouseandskirt it is urgent, we have until Friday to submit the final evidence, I've asked if I need to write a new statement, but no reply!

You're going to have to pick up the phone OP. You are your priority, but you're not the solicitor's only priority. You're going to have to put yourself at the top of their list.

I totally get that phoning someone can become this huge deal (trust me!) but it's never that bad once you've done it.

@iffissheswerefishes I know you're right! The thought of it fills me with absolute anxiety and dread, I know I should ring, but jesus, I just want to bury my head in the sand, I'm going to do it now, get it done I think, then reward myself, :( I wish it would all just go away!

If necessary write a script or key points down before the call so you can go through them with the solicitor.

You can do this.

Omg thank you, I've done it, I just did it, a really quick call, she expected me to ring, she's ran through what I need to do really quickly! I feel so relieved, I dont have to do a new statement but I do have to select the 3 worst ones (she advised the one ds was witness to) and these are what the court will consider. Thank you for that little push, it's done now! Now to play xbox for an hour :)

Go you!!!

@chazsbrilliantattitude :D Thank you so much!

Well done! Happy boxing 😁

Remind yourself how easy this was and how much you dreaded doing it in future, when you're faced with horribleness to do...

Op I have just seen your threads. You are amazing! I can’t believe what you have been through, and you have achieved so much in a short space of time. Keep on going... small steps forward, accepting the bad days as just that, and not a bad life ( because you have left that!). Go you!!

Hurrah!!! That's your big scary task of the day done. And it's not even lunchtime

Nice one, FedUp, well done. A relief that you don’t have to re-write or start again.

Well done OP! You and DS are doing great

Well done op, your doing yourself and your son proud. Please remember that. I hope your getting the support and care you need xxx

I know it's late, but my friend has just written her statement and it's got to me a bit, the way it's written so concisely and to the point has just hit home, especially about how much of a good friend she was and is, standing by me through everything, I am weeping a tear for her right now!

I can imagine it does get the old tears flowing a bit!

Really glad that you do have a friend like that. She obviously values you too, remember that. You’ve a lot to give now you’ve got some space to be yourself again.

💐