Ex dp, ds, fake name, extra kids, second thread

[Fedupofitnow123]

Thank you for your continued support, I'm starting this thread regarding the impending court hearing tomorrow, if someone could link my previous thread that would ne highly appreciated!

Thanks everyone. I hate women tearing other women down. Especially when the OP has been so brave, and is coming out of an abusive relationship where she could possibly have never been believed. And anyways. Who is that sanctimonious little shite to pass judgement?

OP you’re doing great. You are so strong, and it obviously was the breaking point that pushed you, but many women don’t get to that point. You’re lucky to have such a wonderful support group around you. I wish you the best of luck in the future and to your DS too. You are a great role model for him. Keep going the way you are going lady, you’re very impressive.

Sending support and best wishes OP.. you have done magnificently and will continue to do so I'm sure... look after yourself Lady..

May I suggest that posters referring to unpleasant posts- now removed - consider asking MNHQ to remove their posts

Where they're quoting or referring to the unpleasant poster I mean. If you think appropriate.

Neome I have considered it, but I feel (maybe wrongly) that it may stop others who feel it is acceptable to subject OP to another type of abuse.

Obviously I’m happy to consider otherwise if more recommend or if OP requests so. I may be looking at it in a very simple sense and I’m happy to remove if people think that’s appropriate.

OP - you have done brilliantly. The next phase of court cases etc can take months and years. There is nothing you can do to control the timeline and little influence on the outcome - so if you can - park the worrying - because right now you need to look after yourself so that your new baby is not emotionally harmed in the womb by stress - and your other little boy needs major repair to restore and reset his emotional health. So lots of de stressing activities, yoga, mindfulness, walks in the fresh air, sleep, fun times with friends and family, simple, gentle routines so that you build your calm and peaceful home and new family unit. Pace yourself. The shock and the exhaustion may well just kick in one of these days. Rest up physically, protect yourself emotionally, nourish yourself and congratulate yourself for giving your sons the very best future.

SkintSanta that was a great post, well said. Here here.
I understand why Neome has suggested that those of us that have quoted part of the now deleted post maybe should ask to have their posts deleted but I agree with you.
Let them stand and then other nasty posters may be deterred. But all posters can see the level of support for a brave woman just doing her best. It's good to see the rallying round a woman in need of support, I think that Mumsnet was set up to support women.
Fedupofitnow123
Wishing you well

Just popping in to give you another squeeze and a cheer for what you’re achieving.

Remember your little boy and his joy at leaving that man, this is all that’s important

Stay strong little one, you can do this

Hey, hows the eating going? Are you managing to get something down?

One day at a time, one hour at a time if need be.

Hope you are having a better day today UP

Hope you're OK op, an adrenalin crash is totally to be expected. Try and eat whatever and whenever you can, forget 'meal times' or 'healthy eating' (as much as you can!).

I find cup a soups are my go-to, but nutri-shakes would probably be better.

You're amazing. Your son1 is amazing. And it's sure as hell not his fathers influence. Son2 will be amazing too, cos he has you. And your sister sounds fabulous too... you have this OP, you can do this.

I hope that you spent today watching Harry Potter with your boy, cuddling in and having some chocolate.

Another day done OP! Hope you've been enjoying an imaginary butterbeer today x

Morning everyone, thank you for your messages,

So, had an extra day to the weekend because I'm really starting to dread the week :(

A lot of phone calls to make today and appointments to go to. Absolutely dreading getting back to it, but my head is in a mostly better place, I'm mostly pretending it's not happening as much as I can, this poor little baby in me is having a stressful start to life. Today I'll be self referring for counselling.

Thanks for letting us know how you're doing, and I can assure you that life will get easier with time.
Good idea to have counselling, and hope you;ll soon feel the benefit; meanwhile, you're doing really well.

Op, stay strong. This was never going to be easy. You need to fight for your freedom and that twat needs to be punished for his disgusting behavior. Do this for your kids. Remember how happy your son was. Your an amazing woman xx

Best of luck OP

Well done OP, sounds like you are being really productive. How are you feeling?

I'm feeling headachey all the time, but trying to rest, eating a bit better, and sisters have bought me a boat load of chocolate :)

Well chocolate will keep the dementors away!

I dont know if you ever listen to audiobooks, but as your a hp fan I can highly recommend HP read by Stephen Fry. I find it comforting (when my head is over thinking) to listen to an old favourite. It stops my mind racing in a million different directions, especially at night.

I will give them a download I think, thank you, it would be lovely to get into the books again!

Day by day, one step at a time. You'll get through this. Just remember that you don't have to do everything all at once.

@Fedupofitnow123 if you could get someone who specializes in perinatal psychology and has a background in DV to chat to, that would be so helpful. Was lucky enough to have a great psychologist in my pregnancy and she got me through the court case and birth etc. Honestly don't think I would I've made it without her.

How're you feeling now?

I started reading your threads yesterday and just finished now. You are unbelievable! You’re so strong and an inspiration to so many other people in a similar situation. Your DS sounds wonderful and very insightful. I’m sure you’re both looking forward to enjoying a peaceful Christmas together with your family. I think you’re amazing.

You're doing amazingly well OP. And you have the collective might of MN wishing you well, too. (Ignore the exceptions, there's always a few twats).