Dating Thread 175 - It's not you, it's them. Also: people are weird at Christmas time.

[MoreNiceCereal]

1. The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. Know your worth.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future

Link to Info on Dating Websites & Apps www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3514717-List-of-Dating-Site-Info-Dating-Thread

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Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item.

😂 I’m sure all the old ladies having their pension special lunches were watching.

@Jane1978xx I'm glad it went well and i love a bit of car park snogging!

Me too. Carpark snogging A*

Car park snogging = good first date, no doubt.

Welcome phannypharts = great name. Sorry you’ve been let down. There are definitely misanthropes out there who collect matches/chats/agreements to date as some sort of self-affirming trophy, with no intention of seeing it through. It’s them, not you

I've found my people

I kind of expected it to happen, but not two days in. I forgot the sheet amount of energy you need to deal with this shit.

Anyway, looking forward to getting to know you all and hopefully hearing how you've found good men and women to share your lives with.

Energy needed, for sure. So much ridiculous behaviour!

Welcome to the thread.

I feel like a crazy person sneaking out of work for a drink and a snog 😂😂. We shall see where this goes. Defo meeting wed for a date and maybe Sunday depending on childcare

Glad it went well Jane xx

Thank you. Thing was we didn’t message that much and I wasn’t all invested but it went so much better than I imagined 🤷🏼‍♀️. Defo the way to go to meet ASAP

@PhannyPharts I turn off my profile and turn it on for a few hours in the evening I got a lot less wierdos then

Woohooo @jane1978xx 😘 sounds fab.

@Ant330 😂 would be reasonable to about turn if football shirt was his chosen attire...

I went for a coffee with a man who turned in a football shirt 😂. It’s casual but not that casual 😬. Even a hoody would be better

😂Khaleeai yes that would be the correct and imo perfectly reasonable course of action.

Should that have said Khaleesii bloody old age!

Sounds great jane

Welcome phanny

Glad you’re feeling better now sunshine

Oh notcool how are you feeling about Mr S??? You were so strong on your non contact. Hope you’re ok?
Well me and Mr Big still dtd so not just friends 😂 but for some reason I feel much more in control of it. I just don’t feel the attachment I felt before. I only reply / see him when it suits me, he is not suitable for a ltr but we do have fun.

Missed posting on the last thread, it moves so fast! Good first date jane and glad to see so many still on the smitten bench, my heart sank a little at the blip sunshine so glad you sorted it out quickly.
Quick update from me, things are still going well with MrY and we've been together around 3 months now, met on tinder. He's so bloody lovely and beautiful. He's said the L word but I haven't yet, he's cool with it though. He has met my (young) dc but it felt right and they get on brilliantly. Dc young enough not to notice if he did disappear so I don't feel too guilty.

Bumble!! Two matches have randomly disappeared this week. One after arranging a date.
The other after suggesting we meet. But never got round to the specifics.

I've just matched with the second one on Tinder. Asked him why he unmatched me. He said he didn't. All his matches disappeared over night. He reinstalled Bumble but they never came back. He thought I'd unmatched him.

So we've swapped phone numbers, just in case.

Pof’s been v odd as well. Maybe pre Xmas overload 🤷🏼‍♀️. .

Hope everyone is doing ok, @Savoretti sorry about your dad. And your ex sounds an insensitive prick. Completely stupid.

So I matched with a colleague on bumble and we're flirting a lot... I don't know what to do....

How close a colleague ? Like you actually work together or just same company?

May I join you? I have been single my whole life, have dabbled in OLD in my early 20's but got bored of it. Lately I have felt a bit lonely so thought I would give it another go but have been so unbelievably disappointed so far. I've downloaded woo plus as it's supposed to be fat women friendly, have created a profile, used up to date photos, full length and all that--I have nothing to hide about the way I look, also I thought that it would filter out all those that aren't attracted/ interested in fat women. I keep getting messages from people who haven't bothered to read. Or those that just want to be rude. And also Loads of 50+ men, even though I have stated that my age range is up to 38 (I'm 33). It's been 2 weeks and the experience has made me want to go on a date even less than I did before.

Hi and welcome , on Pof you can choose what I think is bbw. And men can filter it in or out. Might be worth a try ?

That sounds very disheartening, @dillite. I've never heard of that app, but I've heard of and/or know of plenty of people of all sizes matching on tinder and the like. Have you already tried them?

Same department, not in constant contact. Don't speak that often- I don't really know him at all

No, I haven't tried tinder and pof as I thought that they weren't fat friendly. I shall check them out.

Thing is, I don't even know if I want an actual date- it's been that long! I am happy with some flirting, chatting and then maybe a date. Having been away from the whole thing for so long I just kinda forgot what it's like.