Break up support thread 4

[herbsmokedchicken]

Sigh.!

Can I join?

Split with DP of 4 years in September. Neither of us had been happy for a while. Stupidly jumped into a FWB situation with a work colleague and fell for him big time. Turned from a distraction into a shit show.

He told me last night the whole situation was birthing more for him than a good blowjob. Don't think I've ever felt so fucking shit. All I want to do is phone him.

Nothing more, not birthing more! Not sure how that even happened 🤦🏻‍♀️

You’ve messed up your name change btw!

That’s horrible for you, you won’t even have been recovered from your break up and then this has happened. Maybe a good time to take some time for yourself!

@Dazedandconfused10 yeah it’s tricky, it’s sort of admitted to yourself it’s really over if you carry on dating isn’t it?

Oh god! I changed it once and I just want it to go back to the original one but I can't bloody figure it out

@herbsmokedchicken yeah and I dont know if I want that or even anyone else at this stage.

@whataballbag if you report your post to MN they might change it for you! I didn’t even mean to keep this name so long, I didn’t realise I’d end up on a long running thread!

@dazed (can only tag people now and again for some reason!) I know what you mean! I don’t really want anyone but I am lonely. The guy I was sort of seeing I think is back soon, I don’t think he’s looking for anything much so if I can control my feelings, hopefully we can have a chill time whilst he’s here, I don’t think I want anything more. Won’t be getting married any time soon unlike some people!

It’s just weird, if we’d stayed together we’d def be engaged by now and probably about to be married fairly soon. And instead...

I've just ordered a load of books and signed up for gym classes. The next 29 days will be spent not thinking about any men!

Good plan! I’m reading a sort of self help book atm, it’s Islam based but aimed at people of all faiths and it seems good. Never bad to spend time focussing on yourself!

Phone came up with a text from an unknown number, nearly had a heart attack! Was random spam 🙄

I mostly just get messages from pizza hut 😂

It was some kind of lip suction junk text! Ugh feeling really shit this evening but haven’t really eaten today as was feeling anxious and sick and lunch and I’m really hungry now so hoping I’ll feel better after my tea!

Same! I was feeling so good last night. Today's message exchange has messed with me.

It’s amazing how stuff can fuck you up and set you back isn’t it!!

How’s everyone doing today? I’m feeling a bit poo! Going to really try and not social media stalk tho, I’ve gotten into a bad routine of it, so hopefully that will help!

I fel odd. I had a dream about him last night. I assume because he was on my mind so much yesterday. But I went to the gym today, have done some house work, actually eaten a meal so I'm doing better I think!

Oh yeah the dreams will fuck you up! I did dream about him but luckily can’t remember it, some of them linger like a bad fart. Out for lunch with friends except it’s to plan stuff for her wedding! Salt in the wound...

I’m just so bloody SAD! I know it’ll pass and I’m trying to be positive but ugh. This sucks. I hate it. I hate every fucking second.

I wish I could skip forward to when I'm over it. That would be super helpful!

I said that so many times at the start of these threads! Really bad night last night. We always saw each other at the weekend and it was so hard to think that whilst I was sleeping alone, he was sleeping next to her. Didn’t get to sleep till nearly five. Still feeling better for a bit of sleep tho. This is a setback but I’ll be ok. Just all so fucking sad. This time last year was a Saturday so I’d have been chilling in bed with him right now. Probably waiting to be brought my toast and coffee in bed. I just really miss him, even tho I can appreciate how selfishly he has acted and how immature he is and probably wasn’t really ready for a long term relationship. So good luck to this new one, she’s stuck with him now!

I keep thinking about suggesting to ex we should meet up but I just dont know if it's a good idea. We need to sort out house stuff but maybe I should just leave it.

Oh I was doing so well but I just feel very lonely today. I miss him. Even though I list all the shitty elements to our relationship I still over all miss him.

Yeah I know how you feel! It’s not as bad as it was but even months later I miss him. Or I miss the him I remember.

I honestly want to just burst into tears because of how lonely I feel. I had the empty house and the going 24 hours with put speaking to another human. It is shit.

It is shit. It is shit and hopefully it’ll stop being shit for you quicker than it is for me but it is shit.

I’m wallowing tho for sure, I need to start being stronger. Just so hard to reconcile it in my head, this time last year things were amazing and now he’s married to someone else and I’ve lost him forever.

Can I join? Me and ex broke up 7 months ago, I kicked him out cos I just broke tbh. Too much mental health going on and felt I couldnt open about it to anyone. Anyway we ended up staying friends cos we have a 1 year old together, on December he asked me to go to a bar together and to go to New York. Next thing is he suddenly stop talking to me so I confront him and get told "we dont need to talk all day everyday" and then after 3 weeks he finally tells me hes talking to someone. Shit hit the fan, I'm not proud to admit that. It happened in front of his other 2 kids and a friend. I feel awful, hes told me he is done with me and I need to accept that. Its.so hard though 😭 up until that night he said he still had some feelings for me, admitted he was no longer in love with me (cos I kicked him out). Hes one of these reactors, so he will go mad call you everything then after a few weeks he relaxes and admits he didny mean what he said. This time though I wonder cos it did get so bad a d now hes talking to someone else maybe he meant it 😣

My mental health still isnt great, but I finally spoke up and my gp is arranging counselling thank goodness.

Any advice?!