Break up support thread 4

[herbsmokedchicken]

Sigh.!

How’s everyone this morning? Have actually had some sleep now so things are seeming slightly less surreal. Feeling ok at the moment but it all seems to change so fast! I guess now knowing he’s truly moved on may help. I feel like I never really knew him like I thought.

I’m so lonely but every time I try and look at the dating apps I’ve just got zero interest. Altho I didn’t have much interest before tbf. I’m not fussy I don’t think but I also don’t want to settle. Ugh. Feeling just generally a bit meh rn.

I was supposed to go on a date ish type thing last night but I felt super sick and bailed. And actually was in bed by 8. I dont think i really feel like dating right now. I did speak to ex briefly. I might actually be coping better than him right now.

I don't think I'm ready for dating either, one day but not yet. I don't want to rush into anything and tbh still do miss him a bit.

Yeah it’s hard because I’m lonely but not for someone new. But the door is proper closed now. I always thought maybe we’d find our way back to each other but he has closed the door, bolted it, there’s a guard dog outside, a barbed wire fence...

But the door is proper closed now. I always thought maybe we’d find our way back to each other but he has closed the door, bolted it, there’s a guard dog outside, a barbed wire fence

Probably not much help in this situation but I feel exactly the same way. I know my ex isn't married but it definitely feels like maximum security door closed and that does make me sad but I know I can't mope after him forever because of this. Ah well.

Yeah it’s hard eh! I’ve always had this thing where I don’t fancy attached people, like there was a guy I’d had a crush on for years but the second he got a girlfriend my crush disappeared, I just never fancy attached people. I wish that skill would kick in now, cos I could really do without having feelings for this particular attached person.

Was thinking about how we are not connected on social media or anything anymore and suddenly thought - wonder if he even still has my number? He doesn’t need it anymore, we are clearly never going to speak again, but it’s horrible to think of him deleting it.

At the same time, I wouldn’t want my husband to have his ex’s number so 🤷🏼‍♀️

Should point out, I wouldn’t want them to have their ex’s number in a situation like this where it’s fresh and there’s clearly still a shit ton of emotions involved on the ex’s part. I’m not super possessive or anything.

Wonder if she knows about me? Kind of hope she does cos that means they are starting with honesty. I hate that he’s not with me but if he’s going to do this whole arranged marriage thing, I really hope for their sakes it works. I’ll be happy again one day, I don’t want anyone to end up miserable in the end.

Trying not to think about the mechanics of their relationship too much tho cos it hurts and also, it’s kind of weird of me lol. Really need to try and get better at redirecting my thoughts.

It's so tough. My ex and I are still in touch most weeks and its probably not ideal but we have a house and pets. I'm not going to see him for a month or so though and then might suggest a meeting.

Yeah I guess it’s different for you, you’ve got joint responsibilities to sort. def best to go as NC as possible.

There’s literally no reason for A and I to ever be in contact again and I guess that’s for the best but it fucking hurts.

There's no reason for me and ex to ever be in contact again either, same, it's for the best but it hurts! You go from all this contact, sharing every aspect of your life to absolute zero. It's horrible!

I had a meeting at the school today about younger DC. Stupid twat ex was there (DCs dad, we split 10 years ago).
I so so wanted to message recent ex some of the stupid shit he came out with. And then remembered... he won't care. :(

Ahh that’s horrible @porpentina. I’ve had that feeling, wanting to share stuff with A and I can’t anymore. And definitely can’t now! It sucks. I will get better, I know, but I hate this.

@Jonsnowsghost yeah I hate it! This just sucks so much. Bah. I’m just really bored of feeling this way now. There’s no hope left (in terms of him coming back, not in life in general, things aren’t that bad) so I just want to feel better now!

So some good news on my front. Looks like I can afford to keep the property in my name only! Just need to save save save this year!

I was sending him messages originally. We agreed we would stay as friends so I sent him things I thought would be amusing and vice versa. But its hurting to much at the moment so I've had to block him until I'm in a better place mentally. sigh

That's great dazed. We don't need these men!

Oh brilliant @Dazedandconfused10! That’s excellent.

@porpentina we exchanged the odd message initially but that tapered off, don’t know how long it would be till I would feel ok to genuinely be just a friend again, I had hoped it would happen one day but unlikely now.

Feeling ok at the moment. Cautiously optimistic

That's good! I'm feeling ok. Still trying to get used to these evenings alone but they are getting easier.

I’m still thinking about him constantly lol but that’s not new, but I’m adjusting to the married thing. It’s getting better!

How’s everyone doing today? I’m feeling alright but also thinking about him constantly, it’s a weird and frustrating way to be.

Aaaaaaaaaand now I feel sad. I just want him back so much. It’s crazy to know that he’s not in pain like I am. No idea if he actually loves his wife or not yet obvs but I don’t think he’s sat thinking of me in the slightest.

I am just so sick of this now. I want to feel ok.

I'm doing well! I just got told an insurance claim I put through has been accepted, I'm steadily losing weight, maybe it's the sunshine but I feel great today! Hope you are able to get him off your mind for some of the day!

He may well still be in pain over the break up, but dealing with it like a man which is to not show it. I'm going to be just pushing mine to the back of head for as much as I can.