Break up support thread 4

[herbsmokedchicken]

Sigh.!

here for you

Ugh I feel really shit!!! Definitely shows me how much better I’ve been feeling lately but this is horrible! Really hoping my period is a contributor and when it fucks off I’ll feel better. All I can think of is how much I miss him and how much I hate that he is starting this new life without me. It is such a horrible feeling.

So how is everyone today?

At the moment I’m feeling a bit better but still down, still can’t stop thinking about him. I’m doing my head in! I’m going to have a google and see if there are any specific techniques you can use to train yourself to stop thinking about someone lol, cos just thinking about something else doesn’t seem to do it. I wish I could let go and move on, it’s nearly four months now, but it’s just so hard! I feel ok and then I flashback to when we were together and I just think how, how can this be over? How can he have just stopped loving me? And I know it happens all the time and I know we obviously just weren’t meant to be but that doesn’t help me make any sense of it. I just want him back. No, I want this to have just not happened, I want us to have never split. But that can’t happen. I just hate feeling like this! It is slowly getting better so I know I’ll be ok but ugh.

🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄 for god’s sake! Just checked my balance and for once I’m not skint but instead of being happy I’m sat fighting back tears cos I can’t text him and tell him! He’s the one who I spoke to about my money worries. Grrr! I’m hoping this is my period making it worse coz I’ve def gone downhill.

Well my ex called lat week for some unknown reason and I am back to square one, sigh. Really too old for this crap

What happened? This is such shit isn’t it? I just genuinely thought we were It and I still can’t quite believe it’s over. Like, still. Stupid brain!

@gnostick22a oh no. What did he want? Why dont they just disappear from everywhere? (Our memories included...)
@herbsmokedchicken sorry to hear youre still feeling like that . I know my hormones have a massive impact on how i feel . Im gonna spend another weekend alone( no kids either) i need some ideas of things to do. I have no friends or family near so something to do alone but i have no idea wtf to do.

@Startingoveragain1 yeah it’s just horrible! I’ve got no plans this weekend and my mum is out Saturday so I’ll be alone. Got lots of books I’ve been wanting to read so may try and make a dent in them.

@Startingoveragain1 I agree, I hope mine has disappeared. Hes been blocked a week now, I'm a bit scared he will find a way round it and ask why or something, which will be much more painful than if I just never hear from him again. I'm at the angry stage where I realise he was playing me vs his new woman and I just hate him for it. So manipulative, he didnt deserve my love I hope for some good news soon, but work feels crap and no decent dates either.

Still feeling a bit down, still hoping he would contact me 😅 I know, I know, he won't and I really need to keep telling myself that! Gosh do I miss him though.
I've had a long message sat in my notes for weeks that I'm not going to send but it's cathartic to add and take bits away with what I'm feeling and what I wish I could say :)

@PuffinSock glad to hear that he's now blocked!! What an arse

Im not gonna lie... im listenin to him procrastinating to the dogs downstairs... (we have puppies) he is one miserable bastard... he cleans 5% of the mess and when he does that he makes it sound like is doing it all. Ffs get a grip. Im toying around the idea of joining a dating app just to get kind mind off it all ... but then again i couldnt care for no man... i literally hate men atm. Srlf absorbed cunts that can just cut out when they feel like it. Do one twat.

@PuffinSock well done on the blocking!

@Jonsnowsghost I also have a note on my phone that I add to! I’m still doing the typing and deleting in our message box tho and I must stop

startingover anger is good, embrace it. I wish I could get more angry, I think it’d help. Altho today I went in the loos at work and instead of crying I did silent screaming. My face was bright red after! But I felt a bit better.

@Jonsnowsghost @herbsmokedchicken I think the only way he could contact me is by post I just really hope he doesnt as i dont think i can cope with him trying to mess with my head anymore. From his recent track record it seems like he will happily contact me to try for sex/ego boost/chat but I know now that hes a liar and cheat.

I agree it's so hard, I think its affecting my work too, I feel so dejected atm. Hoping something good could be around the corner, who knows

If anyone complains about my work I am fully prepared to cry and blame it on this but I’m actually just not that great at my job lol

I’m sure something good is waiting for us!

Ultimatum given. He has this weekend to think about whether he wants to get help together or alone or not in which case he is gonna have to go because im losing my shit in limbo. I feel relief and im shitting it all at the same time. Also told him better if we don't talk to each other at the weekend (he is going to be away).

@Startingoveragain1 I knew you shared a house but didn't knkw you shared a bed. That has to stop. He can sleep on the sofa. Get a lock for your bedroom door if you need to. You can't possibly think straight when you have to sleep in the same bed as him every night. It's intolerable.

Hi can I join? my husband left 8/9 weeks ago now, altho he was a horrible, lazy, abusive man so I know I’m better off in the long run but I’m going backwards not forwards ladies!
And stupid me because he has a contract phone in my name ( iv since asked for it back) checked the phone bill out, noticed he was ringing and txting one number a lot so I put it on WhatsApp and it’s a woman he works with!
Been txting her since about 2 weeks after he left!
I know I’m better off but need a kick up the backside after doing that! Lol
Hope your ok and nice to meet u all xx

Welcome @tiredmum8 urgh men are such shits, I will never ever understand how they can move on so quickly (mine knew the OW for one day and left me for her, it'd be comical if it didn't hurt so much!) And although mine wasn't horrible or abusive etc he did treat me badly by doing this and I still miss him and still would probably go back to him given the chance! I'm definitely in a better place though and you will be too, be strong, we are all in the same boat here :)

@Tiredmum8 Must still be hard even if you know you’re better off! It’s not easy for any of us. Welcome, but sorry you have to be here!

I’m feeling a bit better today but still feel down. Every now and again I’ll be feeling ok and then “he’s bought a house” goes through my brain and I feel sick.

Just been thinking to myself, what’s that strange feeling? The fecking hope is back!!! For gods sake.

Focusing on where I will move to if I move. I really liked Leicester when I went but it’s super close to where A will be living, and I don’t want to look like a stalker. Liked Birmingham and Manchester when I went there but I’m slightly scared of living in a city. Never lived anywhere but my sleepy town...need something to focus on even if I don’t end up moving tho. Cos can’t keep on like this!

I did a facebook status that only he can see. Tragic. But I’m 99.99% sure I’m muted on fb and will never be seen

I live by Birmingham! Well about 20 minutes drive from there.
Thankyou for the welcome ladies how r u all tonight? Iv had a better afternoon/ evening. Keep thinking of them together still but just keep thinking she can have the lazy, immature, abuse Idiot! Lol.
Going to chill out now catch up on eastenders xx

Hey welcome! @tiredmum8 to this sad neck of the woods. All this is actually a lot more tolerable when u can talk to someone!
My twat is upstairs packing up for yet another weekend away hoping he will soul search and find clarity and on his come back he will have to make a choice. Hoping he really misses me like he did last time. But with how irritable and assholy he has been of late i dont even know if ill be happy if he chose to stay. If he choses to stay split then im done and he will have to leave. (At least that's my plan, i hope i wont end up begging) sunday is dday. This morning he said he will think about it , and knowsits unfair on me and, that he doesnt know, sometimes he thinks its best to split and other times he thinks about all weve built together... im just exhausted now

I thought i was doing alright and ive just seen a facebook post about a dying chimpanzee and now im crying. 🤣😅shame

The most random things can set me off at the moment! I find when I laugh, it sort of segues into crying if I’m not careful!