Dating thread 172: from developing a rhino hind to finding love in the unusual places...the rollercoaster of dating!

[CodLiverOil556]

1. The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. Know your worth.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future

Link to Info on Dating Websites & Apps www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3514717-List-of-Dating-Site-Info-Dating-Thread

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Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item. 😘

My age range is 37 to 45...I’m 40. I very much doubt I’d be attractive to a gorgeous man in his 20s, more’s the pity.

@fmfl I am 40 and I had a 28 year old doctor ( very hot) begging me to go on a date. But to me he was just too young. But you would be surprised and also men in their early 30s.

Lifegoes I don't know if it's something about this generation of 20 something lads but in some ways they seem to have more respect for women than guys my own age- they seem less sexist somehow. I don't know, might just be I've had good luck with the ones I've met.

I'm going to enjoy being able to pull the likes of Mr Cath Fach whilst it lasts. We are making plans for a lovely evening next Friday basically sex all night

Oooh @Jane perhaps I need to widen my criteria! A hot young doctor would be right up my alley

I agree @InTheTempest I've never looked twice before. But the ones I've met or spoken to have been respectful, no game playing etc

Aaah the L word.
Mr Tri and I are also skirting round it. I’m with others on being so messed up with previous partners that what even is it....
I’m definitely so in something with Mr Tri though. I trust him implicitly, respect, adore, believe in him and all the rest.
It’s the most delicious feeling whether it’s love or not....

I found lots of 20 / 30 somethings interested in me and there were two very good looking ones I considered dating but they both suggested coming to my house and so didn't have the maturity to know that most mums are never going to invite a strange man into their house while their children are there. I was worried about my saggy post pregnancy body too but also wanted to have sex with someone who wasn't my ex husband for the first time!

In defence of 40 year old men two of our lovely men on this thread @HairyArsedMan and @Ant330 are very respectful to women and so is Mr R. It's just a shame more men aren't like them.

I would love to go to a thread wedding is it going to be @JeSuisPrest or @WooMaWang or @SimonJT first? (Apologies if I've missed off someone on the smitten bench). It would be hard explaining how we know each other but interesting to meet the other halves.

Stealth you are of course right. Lots of nice guys whatever their ages, lots of guys to avoid like the plague.

I think for me, it's because my two worst dates were with mid 30s guys. One of them was verging on scary- seemed to think it was a relationship after one date. This was in my very early days of OLD and on reflection there were red flags before we even went in a date- he was questioning if I was interested if I didn't text him by 9am or if I missed a call from him. He got quite nasty when I didn't want to see him after our date-kept harassing me to meet him again and got nasty when I said no. It shook me up as I wasn't long out of an abusive relationship. I learnt a lot early on. OLD has been really good to help me recognise good and bad behaviour actually.

Well I’ve just sorted my account out on POF and already had a shitty message from some guy angry that I read his hello message, looked at his profile and hadn’t replied within the 10 minute window he arbitrarily assigned me. This is why you’re single, my friend

FMFL I loathed POF. That was where I met the scary bloke 😂

@InTheTempest yeah not the best start!

Hahaha oh @FMFL I hate POF for that. I started feeling rude for viewing their profile and not replying. But I didn't like what I seen in their profile. Then I had guys who would send me the same message 2 months later. It was obv a copy n paste to all women. Horrific.

@StealthNinjaMum oh for the record I wasn't saying that all older men are disrespectful. I know many Male friends who are lovely. All have really good relationships with friends. It's just what I said previously, everyone is different regardless of age. Both good and bad.

Loo update: 25 is too young!!

Ok. New iron defibitely needs a nn now. Going to call him Mr Irish though haven't yet found out if he has an accent (hopefully in the next half an hour...) he's 30, so 6 years younger and lives about 25 minutes from me. From thr new pic he sent i think i cpuld quite fabcy him and he seems funny, bright and human so fingers crossed. He also seems keen on a date so I'll keep ypu all posted.

Loo update: 25 is too young!!

This made me actually properly laugh out loud. Please say why...

Hahahaha and me 😂😂 @NoMoreWeepingAndWanking

😂 ah peanut I wanna know why too

@Peanutbuttermouth haha we’re all waiting impatiently for further details! 😂

@FMFL he was 🥵 but I just couldn’t. I just block on Pof if I’m not interested they’ll never know and could assume you left. Had a right wierdo today 😂. What’s my intentions, how long have I been on and how many people have I dated on there 🤷🏼‍♀️

@lifegoes @inthetempest don't worry I know you weren't generalising about all of them, I can hardly complain after the number of comments I've made about men that age all wanting younger women. Fortunately they're not all like that.

I did find it an interesting discussion though about younger men being respectful because I spend a lot of time lurking on the feminism board where you expect 20 somethings to be of a generation bought up on porn that assumes that all women like to be choked and have anal sex on demand.

@NoMoreWeepingAndWanking are you having a 'phone date' with him? I definitely would with someone who potentially has a nice voice.

I want to go to bed but I'm waiting to hear from @Peanutbuttermouth

@jane1978xx was it how he asked those questions that made him seem weird because most of the men I've dated/ chatted to have asked those sorts of questions? Maybe I'm bad at spotting weirdoes!

Oh I just feel like we're in different worlds! He's very sweet and really quite funny but I'm feeling the age gap. Not sure if it's in my head? Also fairly sure he hasn't actually clocked that I have kids.

Haven't caught up with the thread tonight. I am 6 hours into my date and sad it will be ending in about 10 or so minutes. Don't think I have smiled or laughed so much. Definitely want a second date with him

He's text asking for a second date. Not sure what to do now! Should I give it one more go? He had me laughing a lot in the last half hour maybe he just needed time to warm up.

@SimonJT we’re all just pretending to be ‘proper’ adults when really we have no idea what we’re doing
I'm 48 and still feel like this on a regular basis, and I'm a parent of a teenager with a good job, house, all the responsibilities that an adult has, but still don't always feel like one. I do wonder at what age I will suddenly think "now I feel like a proper adult".
I'm surprised by all the comments about blokes in their 20's being mature, respectful etc, I assumed all the behaviour such as dick pics originated from that age group. But maybe it started with those who are now in their 30's and today's 20 somethings realise how disrespectful it is and are taking a different approach??

@slealthninjamum. It was a list in one message , numbered 😂😂😂. Asking those questions over a few days back and forth would have been fine. This was a questionnaire