Dating thread 172: from developing a rhino hind to finding love in the unusual places...the rollercoaster of dating!

[CodLiverOil556]

1. The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. Know your worth.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future

Link to Info on Dating Websites & Apps www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3514717-List-of-Dating-Site-Info-Dating-Thread

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Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item. 😘

It’s like a full time job 😂. Alongside my actual full time job and 80% single mum life 😫

Seriously? No good reason not to message him...?

All this talk of how long a first date should last-my record was a 19 hour first date!

@NoMoreWeepingAndWanking message him if it'll make you feel better - I probably would

@cocokoko what were you doing all that time ;-)

Is "happy Tuesday" desperate or not desperate?

Better to say happy hump day tomorrow - I always do to my irons 😁

😂 does that not get the reply ‘I’d hump you ?’

@Jane1978xx
I can only hope.
The man sent me a photo of his tattoo (therefore topless) and i swear I could have licked him top to bottom.
Gah. I wish i could be all cool and reserved but he's the only iron that has actually felt like it's got any legs..

Just tell him that 🤔. Either he’s interested or not and I doubt it would scare a grown man

I may have ... sadly he's hamstrung by his sense of moral absolutism. I am techbicaly still married so he will not mess about with me. So sad.

Best case scenario I am so irresistible he's avoiding me because he doesnt want to compromise his morals. Worst case scenario i whiff of desperation and he's run for the hills.

Sorry, I can't remember - have you met him yet, @NoMoreWeepingAndWanking?

Love a good tattoo, me. Well I would, seeing as I have my own.

No. He cancelled on me on the day for the above reason.

Do we think decree nisi is divorced enough? That's hopefully less than a month away now...

I've always been ambiguous about tattoos but this tribal design across pec and shoulder is rather nice.

Jeez. It's not like i want to marry him. Just climb him like a tree. You'd think most men would be up for that, esp as we align closely on many of our kinks.
Fucksake

I'd drop him, personally. A simple hook-up shouldn't be so fraught. He's probably no good in the sack.

It shouldn’t make a difference as long as you are morally free. No way I’m waiting over a year for my divorce to get back in the saddle 😂😂

And no one on any dating site has actually ask me about my actual marital status 🤔

nomorenicecereal it's FWB we were negotiating, if that makes any difference?

Anyway. Moving on so my ishoos don't hog the thread...

Well I'd drop him even faster then. Way too much hassle, and wtf is he being so judgy for? I've never come across that, all the men I've had casual sex with had zero interest in my marital status.

I'm in a slightly acerbic mood!

I agree seems to much fuss , negotiations and status etc etc.

@nomoreweepingandwanking don't ever worry about your issues hogging the thread! We all have our moments of dominating it, it's often got better advice than our friends would give us.

Do you have any other irons? It shouldn't be this hard with a fwb. You don't have to say what your kinks are but maybe Fab would help you scratch that itch. (Disclaimer: I haven't been on fab but others can tell you about it!)

Ah jeez. Thing is after 15 yeqrs of meaningful sex i don't think i could go completely no strings. Not right now. I was/am.hoping for someone more FWB because i strongly suspect first post-marriage sex will be emotional for me and I'm trying to protect myself a little bit by finding someone who gives at least a little bit of a shit about me.

I've had a heap of matches and some chats but none of them have ever got off the ground or made me feel like i wanted to meet them except Mr Copper.

The kinks are BDSM related. I probably don't need to go into detail but it makes it more imperative that there's a friend relationship behind the sex because of the level of trust involved and the vulerable position i could find myself in.

I miss being held and feeling skin against skin.

Have you tried fetlife? I'm sure you'll find someone, but he doesn't sound like the right fit.

I have but it's too aggressively sexual. Might try going to a social though. If i can find the energy at 8pm on a school night...

I think that you are right to look for someone you trust, all things considered, so just allow for more time in finding the right man. Frustrating, obviously, but imo very necessary considering what you're after.