OhAmIReally If you'd also read my earlier post you'll find you're merely just repeating what I said. You've just spoken of the pigeonhole I was talking about.
This issue of the so-called reward, it baffles me somewhat. Who on earth doesn't want to experience some sort of positive response for their actions? If you ask somebody on a date, you hope they accept. If they don't, c'est la vie. What's the point of anything in life if you don't hope for some potential reward out of doing it?
The hope of a positive response is different to the expectation of one, however. Approaching someone in the first place was enough of a success for me, let alone pushing the point beyond there. In looking back, I'd maintain that I had no expectations of anybody. It still saddens me though that I was clearly not an attractive proposition to people. Thank heavens the experts have found a red-flag category for me though.
And, why put the word "friends" in inverted commas? Bit low, no? Almost indecent. I'm still friends with many of these women, 20+ years on. People - even of the opposite sex - can be and can stay friends sometimes, remarkably.
So, maybe I sound bitter. That's probably the case to an extent. Not bitter at women though, I've never had any divine right to expect anyone to want to be in a relationship with me and still don't.
But if all decency is apparently fake, then what actually is the point of being or aspiring to be decent?
Which can't help making me think, why bother? That's why I feel like I do.
(And sorry for mansplaining too. I'm sorry, I'm hopeless with getting my point across (you'll know all about that one). Apologies if anything I've said sounded patronising).