Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

DH threatening to spoil holiday if raining

210 replies

Loudlady34 · 17/08/2019 08:00

Anyone else's parter horrible like this. He is a nice man and a nice dad in general. I understand he's feeling dissapointed because you expect nice weather in August.
When we were looking to book, My husband wanted to go abroad. I didn't want to as it was over 3k and I thought it would be too hot for our young kids. So we are going to a UK holiday park with activities.

Now he's blaming me because the weather's bad. Saying we should have gone abroad." If it rains I'll be making it clear I'm not happy" etc. How is that beneficial for anyone. I feel like not going now

OP posts:
GinNotGym19 · 17/08/2019 08:22

I second butlins if the kids are under 10 for next time. I go there now instead of Center parcs. Pretty much everything is included in the price, the Bognor one has been done up and the hotel is lovely, the new pool is amazing! It’s 95% indoors too

M0RVEN · 17/08/2019 08:24

You don’t need to “ get the kids excited”, it happens anyway.

Don’t wash his clothes or pack for him. Don’t remind him to pack either.

Is this holiday self catering ? How are you dividing up the childcare and shopping / cooking/ clearing up duties ?

SnuggyBuggy · 17/08/2019 08:24

I'd be tempted to leave him at home if he's going to be a miserable fucker

croprotationinthe13thcentury · 17/08/2019 08:25

Come on OP. What do you get out of being married to this bellend?

DisgruntledGuineaPig · 17/08/2019 08:26

Ah, so it wasnt a joint decision?

Have you said your sorry yet? Try saying that he was right, you were wrong, but would he help you make the best of it.

BillywilliamV · 17/08/2019 08:26

What do you want to be told OP? Obviously he's being a childish idiot, but all you will get on here is other people's rage, which is not going to help you deal with your situation at all. The weather is a pisstake at the moment, he's allowed to be miffed. Only you know if he is likely to follow through with his threatened bad behaviour, which I think is the real key to what kind of person he is. Stay on here for 5 minutes though and you'll be told to leave him because he's basically had a bit of a strop!

croprotationinthe13thcentury · 17/08/2019 08:27

What planet are you on disgruntled? Say sorry 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

dimsum123 · 17/08/2019 08:27

I don't think he's awful or a manchild.

My DH refuses to holiday in the Uk, apart from short breaks etc, because he wants somewhere with guaranteed sunshine and warmth. It doesn't have to be expensive, flights booked early and self catering can be very affordable.

I would be very pissed off if my main holiday was ruined by the weather when it needn't have been.

U wouldn't act like your DH, would try and make the best of it, but no way would I agree to a UK holiday in the future.

Butterymuffin · 17/08/2019 08:28

Tell him now if he's going to moan about something you can't control, he should stay at home. If he comes he makes the best of it.

user1493413286 · 17/08/2019 08:29

I’d be responding with “if you spoil this holiday for our kids I’ll be making it clear I’m not happy”.
Holiday parks have loads of indoor stuff because they’re used to changeable weather and hot holidays with young kids aren’t always that much fun with worrying about sun burn, sun stroke, how they’ll find it.
Hopefully once you’re away he’ll change his attitude

SnuggyBuggy · 17/08/2019 08:31

Now a rainy holiday in a sunny destination, that can happen and that really is shit because there is nothing to do. In the UK there will be an indoor back up plan because it happens all the time. Not so much in the Canaries.

DisgruntledGuineaPig · 17/08/2019 08:34

Yes, she didn't allow him to have a joint decision in booking the holiday, hes been proved right, so saying so rather than getting annoyed hes not excited about a holiday he didn't want to book would probably be the best.

When dh and I book a holiday, we both agree on it or dont book. If I'd insisted on a particular type of holiday dh didn't want to book and then he was proved right, I'd say sorry for insisting and not listening to him. But then I wouldn't book a holiday without us both agreeing.

It's hard to acknowledge you were wrong.

LL83 · 17/08/2019 08:34

"If you sulk on our holiday because I made the sensible decision to keep holiday affordable I will be making it pretty clear how much of a arsehole misery you are."

Alarmclockstop · 17/08/2019 08:36

I don't see what's so wrong in saying sorry I got it wrong we should have gone abroad, but let's make the best of it now and next time we will go abroad. The problem in the rain is that you end up spending more money so he might be feeling that you've not really saved that much.
However if he acts like a dick now it's unchangeable then he is being U.

DisgruntledGuineaPig · 17/08/2019 08:37

LL84 - problem is with that, from what the OP said, they could afford the holiday he wanted to go on, she just wanted to stay in the uk and spend the money on something else/save it.

This is the risk when you dont make big purchases like holidays be a joint decision. If it turns out to be a bit shit, the one who didn't want to do it isnt equally bought in to the idea of making a success of it.

KUGA · 17/08/2019 08:39

I don`t know about the brat of a husband you sadly have.
But I assume he is waterproof like the rest of the human race.
Ask him ?.
I would be inclined to go without him and have a fab time with the children.

LumpySpacedPrincess · 17/08/2019 08:40

Do not pack for him, just assume he doesn't want to come.

sackrifice · 17/08/2019 08:43

If I'd have just left it to him we would have been in sunny Spain now

which is probably too hot to do anything in. Would you have not been talking to him and threatening to spoil the holiday if you had 'lost' this argument?

Marriage is about compromise. Sometimes, a man, yes a man, has to not get their own way for once. I know! The problem is when he doesn't does he pitch in, or actually behave like an abuser punishing you and the family for your misdemeanour of having an opinion that made it to fruition?

Oblomov19 · 17/08/2019 08:43

I'm with him. I am a fair-weather-camper/holiday'er/anything'er.
I hate the rain and would rather be at home. Poor weather when on holiday really hacks me off. I asked Dh if we could go home a day early because of the rain. Ds's wanted Togo home too. Dh agreed. I was so pleased.

borntobequiet · 17/08/2019 08:44

Cheer yourself up with this thread OP. Some people are saying it’s too hot in Spain!

joystir59 · 17/08/2019 08:45

Insist on a conversation right now in which you ask him if he is going to continue to be a miserable bastard who will spoil the holiday. If he says yes, tell him he is staying at home. You and the kids go away and have a thoroughly good time.

Rumours0fAHurricane · 17/08/2019 08:45

You say you 'forced' him into this holiday? Did you? Or did you agree together and you're 'joking' about 'forcing' him?

If it's as you say, then yes, I can see why he may have said what he said.

Context is key here though. No one here knows him. Did he say it as an off the cuff remark or does he actually mean it? What's he usually like? A total bell end?

I'm not going to leap to ' oh my god, what a total bastard' without more context. Too easy to slate him without a little further info

Raffles1981 · 17/08/2019 08:46

"If you would rather spend your money on a solo holiday, then go ahead. We will do the holiday without you" minus kids, this was my response to my fun sponge of an ex husband.

thebakerwithboobs · 17/08/2019 08:46

Op where are you going? We live v close to Center Parcs and it doesn't matter if it's raining, there's loads to do. Your husband sounds like a miserable arse and I would send him to Spain on his own.