Dating thread 162: (Don't wanna be) All by myself...

[Sunshineandflipflops]

The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.

1. Develop a thick skin.
2. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
3. It's all BS until it actually happens.
4. Trust your gut instinct.
5. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
6. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
7. If it's not fun, stop.
8. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Do unto others as you would have them do to you.

And a reminder - you don't know them until you know them!

Link to Info on Dating Websites & Apps www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3514717-List-of-Dating-Site-Info-Dating-Thread?watched=1

Great news tooold how did that happen?

shitwith sounds like you have great boundaries. I will be crossing my fingers all is well

Well I am off to a swingers club with Mr Big and Ms Cutie tonight. Wish me luck gang 😂

Ooh...good luck @Marlboroandmalbec34!

I am waiting for MrSAS to arrive for Glastonbury viewing, bbq and...well you can imagine the rest (just not too much as I am on antibiotics for a UTI still) 😳😂

Oooooh @Marlboroandmalbec34 good luck...I wouldn't have the balls to do a swingers club! Hope you have fun

@Sunshineandflipflops I feel for you...have you been drinking cranberry juice?

Seeing MrC tonight. Apparently we're having a romantic picnic (in his massive garden - heaven forbid we'd actually be able to leave the farm like a normal couple... 🙄), with tapas, wine, music and watching the stars. He's also bought me a bar of Galaxy He sure knows the way to my heart ❤😂

Tomorrows date, MrBiker, has indeed ghosted me. Oh well, I'll continue swiping ....

@JeSuisPrest that sounds bliss! I’m doing the same in my garden tonight but with one of my girlfriends and not Mr Eagle as the crazy fool is up north doing a coast to coast cycle ride. On the hottest day of the year...

@Peanuthedz I’m sorry it’s difficult with MrU. I hope it all comes together soon as I know how much you feel for him.

@Sunshineandflipflops have a great evening! Try some bicarbonate of soda in water. Tastes vile but is basically the same as Cystemme and the alkaline neutralises the acid in wee. I won’t lecture you on Mr SAS as I did the same with Mr Mystery.

@JeSuisPrest that sounds idyllic ❤️ and galaxy my word!

Oh no @Neverexpected2 there should be laws against this...it's fucking horrible!

Thank you for all your advice. I can see me sticking with it in the hope he changes his mind. I know I should walk away but can't at the minute. Please be kind to me when it goes tits up. @Marlboroandmalbec34 shift up on that bench, I'll keep you company for a bit until I see sense. I we are meeting up on Tuesday to discuss things. He may make the decision for me and he goes on a lot about not wanting to hurt me.x

Awww ladies it makes me so sad to see you on this type of bench. I wish you could all see how you are amazing you all and how much more you are worth.

But one thing I will say, no matter what happens I will always be here to support you @Lillyrose19 @Marlboroandmalbec34 @shitwithsugaron

@shitwithsugaron Nooooooooo - then it will be doomed 😂🙈

@Neverexpected2 Oh, FFS 😡

The longer I go on with this dating lark the more I think I just don’t want a ‘proper’ relationship, I’m enjoying myself by deliberately dating guys who it can’t go anywhere with. If they start getting heavy, I’m off. Is that ok? Do we have a bench for this? Or am I a monster?

@CassettesAreCool that was my bench! I didnt want to move from that one to the smitten one either but I bloody had to! It's a very comfortable one for me (avoidant/insecure attachment? ) I'll be back on it sooner or later.

So I had a phone/text bicker with Mr U where he finally texted and then rang. He then asked me to pick up something. From b and sodding q. I said no. Then said he only rings if he wants me to do something. Cue hissy fits on both sides. And then backing down on both sides. Although he was relaxing with friends which delighted me. Anyway we're going out this evening so normal service may have resumed.

peanut thanks, I feel a little better about it now 😊. It was that TED talk put up by daffo - being single lets you find autonomy, mastery, purpose and meaning, and I just don’t think I’m going to find those if I hitch my star to one man.

But that’s me - I hope this evening goes well

Oooh Marlboro have fun. Report back (am fascinated ...).

Sunshine there's a supplement called D-Mannose that, for me, works as well as antibiotics for UTIs. You can get them from Amazon. No use to you now, I realise, but may be worth having ready ...

Thanks for the empathy about my Mum, Peanutz - having to have regular contact with my father is very difficult, he seems to want to lean on me, but we normally only talk about the weather 😕

Mr BC is away at the moment so I'm catching up with a friend this evening - out for dinner and wine ...

How romantic, @JeSuisPrest. I do mean that. I love star-gazing. L word must be imminent!

@CassettesAreCool

I've no intention getting into a proper relationship, for a long long time. I'm ok with this.

Had a coffee with the iron I regretted cancelling on last week. He is very polite and thoughtful and we had interesting conversation, but he's every indecisive (his words) and I don't feel well matched to him. He likely feels the same because after replying to my initial text after the date he hasn't chatted since. Hey ho!

Fucks sake. So we were supposed to meet at about 6. Then he said he'd be about two hours. Then he messaged and said it would be 9. Now he hopes it'll be 10 but can't guarantee it. He's gone all the way across London to collect some decorative non essential item. And wasted my child free evening. On the hottest night of the year. I can hear people partying all over and I made no arrangements as we were meeting to go to a particular outside bar. He says 10 isn't too late to go out. It's England. The bars shut st midnight. And would take 30 mins to get there. I'm seething. He's just taking the piss. It's really disrespectful. So words will be had. I'm fuming now. I'll put up with stuff if it's necessary but not for fripperies.

Oooh this thread is good for offloading. I haven't "needed" it yet as I met mr u just after I started posting and it's been fine. But I'm furious. He's also got to take his employee home to his flat as he doesn't know London and his battery has run out. I'm not over reacting am I? This is just taking the piss. If I read this from someone else I'd think, "he's trying to give you a hint, love" but I actually don't think he is. Aaargh hate this kind of anger. Not sure what to do with it. I want to be calm and clear rather than a raging harridon. Autocorrect wants me to write Harrison. I can be one of those too. Large g and t time. I'm not going for cocktails let's face it

Some people are just beyond selfish Peanuthedz
Don’t let this put you off ..
keep going ... what is meant to be will be ... keep us posted

He's assuming I don't mind. It hasn't occurred to him that it's my time too. That I've spent 5 hours hanging about. Yeah it's nice in my garden with the paper but, you know, not my choice! I'm livid. I'm going to have a drink and write off the evening. I'm about to tell him to do one unless he comes up with the goods. Whatever they are.

@cavalier put me off him or dating? It won't put me off dating. I'll be straight back on the commitment-phobe bench with @CassettesAreCool

I don't think it's even selfish I just think he's unaware and self centred. Might keep posting a lot this evening to keep my warrior woman mojo going

I mean to stop myself falling into grateful self pity mode