Ex from 10 years ago has contacted me

[DearPru]

He contacted me out of the blue, online asking how I’ve been and saying he was sorry for breaking my heart all those years ago and how it’s one of his regrets in life. We chatted about old times, caught up about each other’s families etc and then I discovered he’s currently in a relationship....

Why is he contacting after all these years? I’m wary of continuing contact with him as it seems a bit shady with him having a partner (I’m currently single) he also told me he’s kept all the notes and photographs from when we were together. Again. This is something that would seem sweet and sentimental, if he didn’t have a partner.

I’m very confused as when he messaged me all the old feelings and memories were dragged up and now my stomach is in knots.

Any advice welcome x

He is being an absolute tool. You're too good to be someone's backup.
Can't stand people like that.

There is something wrong there. Hasn’t see. You for years and is only NOW worried you would meet someone else? Despite the fact that he has?

You don’t need that crazy in your life.

That’s what it feels like. He wants his cake and eat it too. I’m worth more than being someone’s bit on the side.

I'm afraid from your comments you are still attached to him, and will arrange to see him with the inevitable results- maybe you are actually in the process of doing this right now.

Don't say you weren't warned.

This is happening to me at the moment - twenty five years after I went out with him! I added a new colleague on facebook and it turns out he is friends with her - it's one of those "you might know these people". It all ended badly when he went out (and later married) a friend of mine - they are still married. He sent me a message asking how I am, and sending a friend request. I didn't want to seem petty so I accepted and then muted. Since then he seems to have been through all my facebook photos, keeps saying how great I look, lots of compliments etc. He asked if I was seeing anyone so I lied and said yes (I've never married). Kept dropping hints about how he wasn't happy at home, no sex life etc. Tried talking dirty to me, telling me how attractive I was etc etc. Pulled him on it several times, he denied flirting etc. Had to block in the end - he's not messing me about for the second time in my life!

Stay away - it's better to be single than someone's second choice or booty call.

Absolutely. The block button is there for a reason.x