Dating thread 161: (Can anybody find me) somebody to love..?

[Sunshineandflipflops]

The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.

1. Develop a thick skin.
2. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
3. It's all BS until it actually happens.
4. Trust your gut instinct.
5. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
6. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
7. If it's not fun, stop.
8. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Do unto others as you would have them do to you.

And a reminder - you don't know them until you know them!

Link to Info on Dating Websites & Apps www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3514717-List-of-Dating-Site-Info-Dating-Thread?watched=1

Definitely go on both dates candace, you don’t know anything until you meet. Enjoy!

@Candace19 Hi there! At this stage I'd view it like buying a couple of skirts in a shop to try on at home. You know you like them both to look at, but until you try them on, stand in front of the mirror, do a bit of a twirl, look at yourself from all angles and then realise one is a bit scratchy, you won't be sure which one is the better fit for you...

I would assume that most men are also multi dating - you don't have to have 3 or 4 dates with each before you decide, but I wouldn't cancel either date before you've met for the first time. One or other could surprise you (in a good or bad way 😂). When are the dates? Exciting times!

Thanks @CassettesAreCool

Good analogy @JeSuisPrest one date today & another tomorrow.

I will go on both....you are right. At the moment it's all in my head and reality could be very very different. I'm so naive haha

I'll update later 🤗

@NestOfSwipers Well done on calling him out on his BS.

@Ginmel 😱😂

@Ant330 Hope you have a great weekend shagfest😁

@CassettesAreCool That's great news, I think arranging a second date straight after the first shows how keen he is and he's not into the whole playing it cool, message after a few days nonsense.

@Sunshineandflipflops I'm saying nothing 😂, other than I know how you feel and it does get better use lots of lube

@Lovemusic33 Fingers crossed you get your heart stolen by a new 4 legged friend today. Is it a rescue or a pup?

Excellent news Cassettes
Lovemusic good luck with the pooch viewing, post a pic if it's the one
I'm just getting up to go and drop mine at the kennels for the weekend.
Sunshine enjoy your road trip and gig, just not too much MrArt sounds worth hanging on onto if only for 1 reason 😂
Candace good advice from JeSuis but the test fitting analogy made me 😂😂😂
Hopefully I'll be too 'busy' to post again until Monday night, so have a good weekend all.

jesuis yes, she’s a rescue pup (well 2 years old), she ticks most of the boxes so hopefully we will fall in love with her. I shall post a photo later if we get her.

love so excited about your pup! I hope you get to welcome her into your family today 🐶

Morning all. My date last night was a wash out. Not really worth getting showered, straightening my hair and putting make up on for all of an hour 🤦‍♀️

As soon as he got out of his car and met me at mine he was making excuses about not being able to stay late as early morning so presume he saw me and thought "nope" so we had 1 drink and left. Oh well, wasnt that fussed and pushed for an early meet to see if anything there because didn't want to waste time messaging if it was going to come to nothing. He was a bit of a knob anyway as seemed to take exception to my car and spent some time telling me how people were apparently buying one type of car as opposed to any from where mine comes from "as the build quality is now shit" - I beg to differ and love my car more than any guy I've met so far 😉🤣

Anyway, have another date with new iron this afternoon so will see whether this lasts longer than an hour 😉

MrSG has no embarrassing undies either, @Ant330. He’s also decided that Calvin’s are the way to go and so he’s got a drawer of virtually identical jersey trunks.

Glad the date went well @CassettesAreCool. He’s quick asking for a second.

And I’m glad you recognised your mistake before you de haired your teeth, @Ginmel.

I can’t believe he has a second car, @NestOfSwipers. You’re probably right about the wife too.

Good luck with the dates @Candace19. You definitely do need to meet people to figure out if you like them.

Hope the pup viewing goes well @Lovemusic33.

Enjoy London, @shitwithsugaron. It definitely sounds like MrB is very keen.

MrSG and I are spending the weekend in a (probably rainy) city 3 hours from this one. He lived there for about 18 years, so it’s like him going home. We’re going to set off once he’s ready.

He does sound like a bit of a knob @Neverexpected2. Imagine criticising your car like that on a first date.

Hope this afternoon’s date is better.

crustaceans I think hed already made up his mind on arrival that he wasnt interested so didn't care what he said or how it came across. Oh well - I was back to watch love island 😁

never I’d be so offended if a date criticised my car, I know my car’s rubbish but it’s like my children and my dogs - strangers take the mick at their peril! Good luck with the next one.

Re Mr Courteous, he texted that he wanted to see me again last night and I said likewise, but today it’s just ‘good morning, how are you?’ - so no actual date in the diary. Grr. I am a diary queen so this doesn’t work for me. I’ll give him a bit longer of course but my foot is tapping.

@NestOfSwipers what an idiot! I can't believe he admitted to owning two cars. He is definitely not worth any more of your time.

@Neverexpected2 he sounds a right charmer. Bullet dodged there.

I went on my date with Ms PT last night and we got on very well, but I'm not sure that I would want a romantic relationship with her. We have lots of things in common and are quite similar in personality, so I think it could be a bit much. Plus I'm not 100% sure that I fancied her. She has texted me today telling me she really enjoyed herself and asking if I would like to meet her again. I said that I would like to take things slowly and get to know each other as friends first, and then see how things go.

I am seeing Mr Mystery tonight but I don't have high hopes really. I can't remember his name as I deleted his number on my phone when we lost touch and I can't remember what he called himself on POF. I know his name starts with R but that is all!

Mr Sailor and I are messaging each other and he sounds really lovely. He comes across as a nice genuine man so I have high hopes for him. We will hopefully meet up next weekend.

Road trip done...tickets collected. It was really nice actually, not awkward, plenty of chat and we even went for breakfast when we got back to where he lives. I think we might be able to do this friends thing.

Yes, 3 times last night during the film. For whoever asked, I think the film was good...😂

I seem to pick the horny ones!

Another date bites the dust!
Been chatting to someone on POF, moved to WA and arranged to meet him this evening. He seemed nice if a little dull.
But then he asked if I had my own business and made a joke about me being loaded.

So I said of course I was. Thinking he was just making fun of my low paid job. But further comments suggested he was possibly serious.
Last night he said 'hi' so I replied 'hi'. He never replied. And when I checked POF his profile had gone.
So I messaged to asked what happened. Read but no reply.
I've just messaged to say I'm not meeting him as I think he's messing me around.

@MyOldBrainStoppedWorking Even if you did call him out, I suspect it would just go over his head. These types don't seem to care. I've been thinking about all the things I want to say to Mr Smiley, but at the end of the day I'm not wasting my time or energy on him. He'll do it to the next one, and the next one. A shame as on paper he seemed perfect... Idiot. He doesn't know what he's missing... 😊

Tonight's cancelled date that seemed a bit off, has now come back to explain.

He says he's been busy with work which was why he was quiet last night. And he wasn't sure if he was going to be able to meet me tonight. But still wants to meet sometime.

And he deleted his POF profile because he was chatting with me so he didn't need it.

Do I reply? I'm finding him a bit intense and weird. Although I think he's just new to OLD and not worked out what to do yet.

@CassettesAreCool one of my frustrations with Mr Runner is that he says he wants to see me again but then takes ages to set a date. It feels like ages but given we have had 5 or 6 dates in a month isn't really. It might be Mr Courteous has a busy diary or needs to firm up other arrangements and I think after just one date you can allow him some time to get back to you. I was speaking to friends about Mr Runner last night and I have had a few dramas not mentioned on the thread and he has been lovely so I am trying my hardest not to judge him on his communications style/ organisation.

@MyOldBrainStoppedWorking maybe I'm too nice but I always give people a chance - especially if they're new to old. I can imagine if i didn't have this thread that I would've come off match before my first date so I totally get it. Also my sarcastic humour did not work with my first few men so he could be like me.

Having said that I don't know what you mean by 'intense and weird' maybe you could give us more info as someone more experienced than me might spot some red flags.

StealthNinjaMum I think I'm the same, I usually give people the benefit of the doubt/a second chance but something doesn't seem right to me.

I don't think my sense of humour works with him at all. He hadn't sent a message that had any sort of joke/humour in it until he made the joke about my work and how much I earned. But then seemed to turn that back into questions about how I managed to earned so much on my own.

I'm only guessing that he's new to OLD because his profile pic wasn't very clear so I asked for another one. He said he didn't want to post a clear photo in case someone recognised him. But he did send it to me.

He has messaged a lot but it has mostly been questions about me. I joked that it was like a job interview and he said he just wanted to get to know me. He has told me stuff about himself in return.

I was ok about meeting him until yesterday when he just said Hi and then didn't reply to my message. Then I discovered his profile had been deleted. He's also removed last seen, profile pic and the blue ticks from WA. That was all done yesterday evening. And it's taken him until now to explain himself.

If I met him I would already be thinking that I probably won't like him.

@MyOldBrainStoppedWorking to me he sounds like he was testing the water with OLD but got scared off when a potential date might have been on the cards.

Had a great night with my FWB, we have got into this fortnightly routine together but it's nice and he makes a hugely refreshing change from the drama with my ex who can be very difficult, abusive etc. My head is saying this convenience is stopping me finding someone suitable for the long term but he is saying let's just live for the moment and do what makes us happy.

@MyOldBrainStoppedWorking I have given terrible advice on this thread before because of my over positive view of people!

I wonder if he's married. I suppose I might date him if I had nothing else on, it wasn't inconvenient to get to, if i didn't need babysitters! With Mr Runner I knew there was a rapport before our first date so I was prepared to pay for a babysitter. I think you would be justified in binning him off.

myold he sounds like a right idiot. It’s often worried me that there are definitely people out there looking for a meal ticket. Like you, I’m very sensitive to it