What is the norm wrt rent when having a partner move in with you?

[glassofh2o]

DP and I have been dating for a little less than a year now, and we've been talking about moving in together. She'd be moving into my place since it's literally right across the street from her place of work. Thus far, the only other person I've ever had living with me was my ex boyfriend who paid half the rent. That's not quite possible with DP now though, given her salary. She's also said that in the past, none of her ex-girlfriends charged rent since they'd be paying the same if they were living alone anyway. That doesn't sound fair though, does it?

What's the so-called norm when it comes to something like this?

@HotSpotSpot

You're right, that was rude of me, and of course the OP's money are entitled to spend their money as they wish.
We're all different I guess, and as a functioning adult paying my own way, I'd have too much self-respect to accept. I'd jump at the odd handout, but monthly as a matter of course? Nah.

Gah, should read 'OP's parents'.

Jesus! She earns more than me (weeps silently into coffee 😢) and I'm a full time teacher (divorced), in my 50s, with a mortgage that's £820 a month...before adding anything else on top! My disposable income after all my bills and food is £50 a month...your GF is a massive CF with a huge reality problem! Run away OP!

It’s a strange way to start a relationship. Ops gf basically demanding she pay her rent because all her previous gfs/her Mum did 🤣
450 per month per bills seems a reasonable split based on your relative incomes. It’s also affordable on her take home pay of 1.9k. In my first job I took Home 2.3 and lived with 2 mates who were on 1.6 to 2.4. I paid 600 p/nth pre bills, and the girl on 1.6 paid 530 p/nth. We had less money left to go out but it was definitely doable. Why should you have to subsidise your gf?! She needs to learn to upkeep herself, she’s an adult for goodness sake

In my case I paid all bills, DP made a token payment towards the mortgage. I lent them money constantly, so they could get on their feet after being a student and having a student loan. I basically subsidised them massively.

When we split up DP demanded a portion of the house, as it had gone up in value, and got a solicitor involved. I hadn't them my end of year bonus.

On the plus side, when they left, I felt infinitely richer even though I'd lost my bonus.

should be "I handed them my end of year bonus".

Either way, it was a massive mistake and it's not something you wish to discuss but it is something that needs spoken about. Clear on who owns what.

She's also said that in the past, none of her ex-girlfriends charged rent since they'd be paying the same if they were living alone anyway.

Wow!! How many ex girlfriends has she moved in with rent-free?

She sounds like a freeloading goldigger! Run for the hills.

You realise you would be funding her indefinitely if she moved abroad with you?

Dieu

Regardless of your personal income or what your parents give you she has no right to say this is all I'm paying and expect you to cover everything else.
She needs to have some self respect and not expect to be a kept women.
I think in all honesty you are better off walking away. She will only get worse and more demanding.
The last thing you want is to build a future with someone like that.