Dating thread 155 - Spring lovin'

[supercali77]

Dating thread rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Do unto others as you would have them do to you.

And a reminder - you don't know them until you know them!

Link to Info on Dating Websites & Apps www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3514717-List-of-Dating-Site-Info-Dating-Thread?watched=1

@kerkyra
Hah

Apparently it means good, giving and game 🤔

I've just had a guy on tinder call me a liar for where I live 🤔

Said my location says so many KM and when he googled from his house to "where I say I live" it's more.

I've had to explain that's because he's googled a traffic route. Tinder doesn't look at what the quickest motorway is. 👊🏼

I was bit taken a back because he has quite a physical job.
Massively binge eats in the evening I think.
Starts work at 5am no lunch break.

@MrDrummer is he single? Is he attractive? Send him to @kerkyra if he's local to her.

Sorry to hear about your grandad sidge
Great loo update drummer
kekrya sorry your date was a no go.
And hugs to all who are feeling down. I too hate that my dc will never have proper family unit but am well over their father. Don’t miss recent abusive LTR ex at all. Hoping that I may be in a position to have 1 more dc if circumstances are right for it in a couple of years with bf

Yeh I hate pointless first dates.
Rather keep meeting the same person even it's it's not firework and lots of chemistry.
Least you build up a rapport over time.

He looked a bit like Nick Robinson @stealthninjamum he wasn't single either. He was a bit dull, tbf. Really good gig, if you like 90s britpop. Interesting that there were all manner of people, blokes with pink wigs, bikers, gothic types, strange smells, sticky carpet, etc. Probably most people on this thread would run a mile, yet absolutely no potato men and everyone looked like they had a story to tell.

Sorry about your grandad @sidge

As regards the 'traditional family unit', it's overrated and old fashioned. You CAN be a proper family with one parent (or two parents that don't live together).

My DC now enjoy lovely times without their DF behaving badly and ruining it. The mum/dad/2.4 kids combo is a fallacy.

My drunken update. No irons and I decided to look at my ex’s WhatsApp profile pic which was her and the guy she cheated on me with looking blissfully happy on some Caribbean cruise :(

richdeniro our drunken minds make us do things we shouldn't!! Hopefully it also will make you forget you saw it 💐

@LooUpdate I didn't get an explanation about the ghosting but a few things come to mind with hindsight. He lived an hour away and worked two hours away, so when he stayed over he did have to get up a lot earlier than usual. All seemed fine just before he blocked me, we'd been to the cinema the night before and I'd asked him out on the Saturday and he said he'd let me know. And then nothing. I sent a message the next day and it went undelivered. And the phone number won't connect either. It's so hurtful how after two, almost three months that there is now nothing. I'm so fed up of checking my phone but can't help it.

Ah rich it’s the pits!

Sorry about Grandad sidge

ceebee he ghosted you after 3 months?? That’s awful. Hope you’re ok

I've been thinking about my dating history/patterns over the last couple of years.
I start off enthusiastic with new profile and pics. Then quickly get fed up because I only get interest from unsuitable men. So I have a few dates with men I'm not keen on, just because they ask & I want to get out of the house.

Finally I delete all the apps and have a break because it's not working.
I've been doing this for over 2 years and I have come to the conclusion that it's me not them.

I'm even struggling to get anywhere on Fab.
So last night I deleted everything. I'm not going to do it any more. OLD doesn't like me so it's not worth the stress.

Good luck to everyone. I hope you all have lots of lovely dates.

I understand myOld and it's a cycle I repeat too. It's either feeling happy as you have a date or feeling shit as there are no messages or replies. The waiting and getting messed about too. And the going on a date where you think you think they aren't really your type but will give them a go.
And then the deleting and feeling relieved...then redoing profile as surely he must be out there
Have a break and see how you feel in the future x

@Marlboroandmalbec34 yep. We spoke / messaged everyday. Saw each other once or twice a week. Had a great time, or at least i did. Missing the contact and missing him. I keep thinking what did i do wrong. If he'd just say "sorry this isn't working for me", it would be slightly easier to accept. But ghosting me without explanation just is an extra hurt.
I've tried to distract myself by getting back on tinder to chat to other people but I can't find anyone i like the look of. Probably because they're not him.

Ghosting is so cowardly cbg but you can't ever know what was going through his brain. Maybe he was married! I think when this happens you have to write them off as unsuitable in your head so you don't pine after them. You have to see him as a big prick and understand that you did nothing wrong - this was all about him, not you. It is a horrific thing to allow someone to live a lie for so many months but it is worryingly common.

myoldbrain I do the same as you. I'm currently off the apps but I know exactly what you mean. It's tough! Have a break and see how you feel or whether you try a different way of meeting people (supper clubs, dating agency etc).

ceebee that is awful behaviour. Cannot believe what a tosser some people are!!! Please remember it’s not you it’s definitely him!!

Do you ever contact men who you consider to be out of your league?

I'm starting to feel very tired, cynical and bitter. This OLD business is just insane. I haven't got the time or energy, it's madness. Then you get ghosted anyway. What's the fucking point.

vwman no man is out of my league 🤣, how can you tell if they are? Most are probably lying anyway, looks wise I don’t tend to go for really good looking men, they don’t really do it for me and they are usually very vein, I tend to go for quirky. There are deffently men where I feel I am out of their league though, the guys with a fag in their mouth or wearing a football shirt 🤣. Love your user name vwman it’s similar to my pof user name, I’m hoping your a VW fan?

rich I feel your pain. My exh has updated his phone profile pic so if he ever calls I'm treated to a loved up pic of him and his mistress 🤬

ceebeegee that's awful behaviour on his part and is a reflection on him not you

vwman no I don't. I'm not a troll but if someone is much better looking than me I don't bother 💁‍♀️

It's almost like, a man can get a beautiful, intelligent, sexy woman, lie to her, enjoy her body and company, give her false promises, and then vanish or say its not working or there's too much on his mind and he needs space etc etc. Then go online and do exactly the same to a new woman!!! No obligations. No effort. No commitment, no guilt. Just a carousel of amazing women, one after another.

I wouldn't message anyone too good looking online as these are the ones who I've found have the pick and are more likely to be arses in my experience. The breadcrumbers.
But,if I saw someone a little above my league out in real life,then yes,i may try and catch his eye :)