Dating thread 155 - Spring lovin'

[supercali77]

Dating thread rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Do unto others as you would have them do to you.

And a reminder - you don't know them until you know them!

Link to Info on Dating Websites & Apps www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3514717-List-of-Dating-Site-Info-Dating-Thread?watched=1

@vwman I needed to hear THIS right now.

oh life that sucks if he has

I'm convinced he has, well more fool him. Not a chance I will meet him now. @kerkyra and he's not even getting an explanation

Have you met him,i can't remember

No meant to be meeting him tomorrow

ok, i know how you're feeling but its alright. If he is on a date that's ok too,as much as it hurts because you've invested time into him. Still go tomorrow but don't mention tonight. Weigh him up tomorrow and see how you feel

You think @kerkyra ? I know people multi date. But I don't like he's actively dating and talking to other women when he's arranged to meet me. Makes me feel as I'm in competition with these women. That's not me!!

I get it,i hate it too. I've always felt the competition,i hated seeing village man on pof last week...but you really need to see it for what it is. You are meeting a stranger for a drink. He owes you nothing. You don't know him. If the date goes ahead, see it like you're meeting a friend. The first date is really just a meet up. You're going to feel shit but OLD is like this and you have to have a very casual don't give a shit attitude. I do get you,i'm massively insecure and the thought of a relationship fills me with dread but we have to stay positive x

Thank you @kerkyra very wise words. I just dislike people who blow hot and cold and since the date was confirmed he's gone cold. Which today has resulted in me pulling away completely.

I know he owes me nothing, but it feels a lack of respect and I'm very sure he wouldn't like me going on a date.

What is happening with Mr Village Man

@Nowthefunbegins Sounds like you're moving in the right direction. As my dear old mum says "You were fine before him, you'll be better after him."

Sod all,he hasn't been in touch. The wise words of vwman have made me remember why i mustn't chase.
I had to walk past village mans shop today,i didn't look in as i was embarrassed. His loss

@kerkyra it's absolutely his loss. He lost the main prize and don't forget that. X

yep,he can stick that sausage right up his bum.
Hope your bloke messages tomorrow,i'm sure he will :)

😂😂😂. Oh he'll message. He sent a message to tell me he was going "out" but I'm treating him likes he's treated me now. He's lost me.

Catching up from earlier...

@StealthNinjaMum

I liked that photo. It was obviously old. It was an action shot and had a low quality, atmospheric feel to it.

Thank-you. It is a great photo... just debateable as to whether it is a great profile pic.

@ponyprincess

sorry if i have wrong

I have three (I think) pictures that are in the last month, but this one is kind of tagged on the end. I think I will try to replace it but won't capture the atmosphere. It is clear that it isn't trying to be a representation of what I look like now.

Mrdrummer but it says something about you. I think it's a good profile picture especially as you have three obviously current ones.

mrdrummer why not reference in your profile the ancient but fab pic? Eg ‘drumming is my lifelong passion, as you can see by the ancient but fab pic*

Well Mr Local was great fun. Not my usual type looks wise but not unattractive. We had a great laugh, got a bit drunk, he walked me home and snogged me at the door. Then he messaged me when he got home saying “bloody hell, you are great, can I see you again”
All in all good first date 😁

@vwman great post, I feel inspired!

@Marlboroandmalbec34 Wow, no mixed messages from him there. Sounds like a great night.

lifegoes is this the same man you said was blowing hot and cold? Why are you so bothered he’s on a date? I have multi dated until the exclusive conversation. If asked I have said I’m ‘out with a friend’ but been vague. I would never have been exclusively talking to someone before we had met and had the chat. And I assumed the same from others.

Mr S was new to OLD and deleted his profile after we met but I think more as he was finding it all a bit odd and difficult rather than he was mad about me. But I was honest with him about what I’d been doing once we had the chat. And again after he has a wobble and I went back on OLD and had a couple of dates.

@lifegoes I also think it’s okay for a guy (or woman) to be dating others at this point as you haven’t met yet. For all he knows you could cancel your first date and then he’d be back to the drawing board.
I don’t multi-date either but I wouldn’t have minded if MrSAS was dating others before our first date. I don’t want to share him now though.

As for competing against others...no! You do you and compete against no-one. If you are the right woman for him (and vice versa) then it won’t be a competition x

Ah not enough time to keep up but @MrDrummer keep the drum photo! It's great. It's clearly old. And it's not like you can see you properly, it's not like you're pretending to be something you're not.

Vw man- brilliant post. Wish we could just like posts! We all need to remind ourselves of that

lifegoes you haven't met this man yet. You don't know if he was on a date.
If he was then he might not like her. There are so many things you don't know about him and he doesn't know about you.
Seems like you're tying yourself in knots about it all.
Meet him and then make the decision.

vwman your post made me laugh because it reminded me of a date who asked "how do you so much at your age?"

I'm not sitting around waiting for a man to fill a gap in my life. But I often get accused of having no time to date. Usually from men who do nothing other than work, watch TV and sleep.
You should offer your advice to men as well, particularly the late 40s and over. In my experience they're the ones who are just sitting around waiting for a woman to entertain them.