Dating thread 155 - Spring lovin'

[supercali77]

Dating thread rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Do unto others as you would have them do to you.

And a reminder - you don't know them until you know them!

Link to Info on Dating Websites & Apps www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3514717-List-of-Dating-Site-Info-Dating-Thread?watched=1

lolly I loathe men who say they are 'looking for signs of madness'. I hear this a lot btw. I once said 'I'm actually quite normal' and one said 'well it's the normal ones you've got to watch out for!'. I said make your fucking mind up!

@LilyRose88 you must be relieved to move on.

@Marlboroandmalbec34 just go with the down.., it's because you've dumped Nick O'Teen. Anyone remember him?

@Lollyjack that's quite funny re normal, wonder what he's after....

Ok so I guess I'm perching on the smitten bench for the moment but I'm pretty sure I'll be bringing some fresh nachos over at some point to share. Possibly with a different crew though? I guess it depends how long it takes

I'm normal, despite my username lol I hate all that 'no drama' rubbish because to me it means they want to do what the hell they like and don't want a woman making a fuss (or asserting their boundaries, as it's otherwise known). I've always said 'do what you want, I can't stop you. I will decide whether you're the sort of person I want to be with, though'.

@DaffoDeffo I've been lurking since you were last on. You always seem to make good decisions ... Ie waiting til end of April then ditching. I'm so heart led and it's no good for anyone.

@LooUpdate I presume there will be no 4th and 5th update.

@MrDrummer I wouldn't like a man to keep his shirt on right till the moment. I love a chest. And a stomach. If I'd got that far I wouldn't care about any remaining fat bits. I think shirt on is more off putting than fat. Sorry...

@Ant330 Clawfoot Bath you say...?

MrSAS doesn’t have a bath in his house either. I love a relaxing bath...it’s not of life a simple pleasures. Add a glass of wine and some music and 👌🏼

Oh @BatshitCrazyWoman I love that comment. I'm going to use that. 👌🏻

thanks peanut that's such a lovely thing to say and it has actually really cheered me up xx

I have adult dcs and they are dating too and actually listening to all their horrors has probably made me take a step back with everything! I've also got a son who is very sensitive so I tend to be kinder to men than I probably was when I was younger. Think we have a tendency to think men are tougher and it isn't always the case. Having said that, I don't want to be taken as a fool which is why I've tried to set time limits on me being kind if that makes sense!

Haha Nick O’teen!!!

life be warned that some men hate it and say you're being judgemental. I don't care what people do, but I do care about the kind of people who are in my life.

You lot chat don't you? Has taken me ages to catch up and I'm a bit confused about who is doing what with whom.

Reassuring comments from people about mumtums and wobbly bits. I have been toying with surgery / laser treatment / collagen on mine but I'm feeling fairly confident at the moment.

@mrdrummer sounds like you've had some tough times and got yourself to a good place I'm sure most women would be happy to have someone with resilience and self awareness who respects them more than washboard abs.

What's a clawfoot bath? Can if fit us all in? I have no plans for the weekend.

Just catching up. Everyone is so busy!
LilyRose88 good to hear you didn't go and see him and have ended it. Sometimes you have to go through these things to learn how to deal with them. Hopefully you won't meet another like him but if you do, you'll be stronger.

Ant good to hear it's still going well with. Who could resist the offer of a clawfoot bath?? 😀

Lollyjack lucky escape there! Sounds like he's the drama queen.

I'm still trying to arrange a second date with Mr 'we're exclusive FWB'. Think I might be moving on quickly if he can't find time soon.

Rant incoming:

I absolutely detest people who start a conversation. You reply they leave you on read and stay online for ages. 🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬

Rant over

mr marvel is acting very strange,lovebombing me with txts and calls but only wants me to meet him at a pub near his. It's had a refurbishment,he says...and he can't get over my way as apparently his car needs some work on it...yet he is off to an appointment today in another town. Weird. I suggested tomorrow but no,car going to friends to have work,can i come to his local? I asked if he actually can drive and has a car.
I can't be bothered with his weirdness.
Why do I attract them :/

kerkyra maybe he wants to be able to drink so is getting you to drive over to him. A bit sneaky if you ask me. Most decent guys are usually happy to travel to a date.

I wondered that but he says he's off the drink and will have a coffee. I even asked if he'd lost his licence (in a jokey way) and nope.

kerkyra that is very strange. It depends how much you want to meet him. Is he stunningly gorgeous and shaggable or just rather mediocre

He's sadly very mediocre. Not my type at all,blonde( could be ginger actually),a bit beaky looking! Next!

The bloke who asked me to be fwb and I said no has asked to do this history activity with me...now he is shaggable. Might have to change my mind as it's been six months for me!

Actually,that's mean of me,he is attractive.But very over the top in txts. Like ' I cant wait to meet you and delete my pof profile' etc. That's not right is it. Anyway,will give it to later and see what he suggests

kerkyra I am always a bit suspicious of love bombing, especially so early on. And he hasn't even met you! Although I am sure that you are absolutely gorgeous and a total catch, and he would want to delete his profile and shack up with you .

Gosh lots going on! I am also stealing douche canoe Peanut absolutely brilliant.

so I went swiping yesterday. Have 2 possible irons. Mr Beard is local ish, beardy and funny. Have tentatively agreed to go to the museum sometime. Are chatting on whatsapp. Mr WFH (works from home) also nice, also tentatively agreed to go for coffee Sunday. Was chatting with Mr Irish who was soooo full of compliments, talking about us dating etc. Then unmatched this morning. Luckily I had already pegged him as a billy bullshitter from the over enthusiastic messaging style and written him off as a time waster.
kerkyra I personally don't like dates assuming I will do all the travelling. They should agree to meet half way at the very least. I agree he probably wants a drink,or is just a bit half arsed about making an effort. Either way, not someone you should waste time on. You deserve better.

kerkyra I am wary of love bombing BUT I think everyone would love to think that the person they meet will be the reason to come off OLD so I don't think it's a bad thing that he says this. I think we're probably just not used to many people saying it any more (because we are all cynical old hags clearly )

@StealthNinjaMum

Thank-you. For all the bollox wholesome advice i give, it doesn't take much to fall off the "have my shit together" wagon. My chimp went on a rampage on Monday eve. Fortunately no-one else got hurt. to @kerkyra for talking sense into me. True friend.

@lifegoes

It's a real bugbear for me. I don't even mind a delay, but its the ignoring of replies that throws me. I do find some people's messaging styles completely unfathomable and invalidating.

lifegoes I think that's a multi dating peril that whole whatsapp thing. What I do know is that everyone who has been particularly interested in me has responded very quickly and I still find it hugely frustrating when people don't (though I'm sure I've been guilty of it at times)

lifegoes good rant. I hate that as well.
Are you going to reply? Should I wait? Or should I get on with my life and make you wait next time?

kerkyra that sounds too much before you've met. And first date should be halfway. Somewhere convenient for you both. Maybe suggest he delays the date until his car is fixed and see what he says.