Dating thread 155 - Spring lovin'

[supercali77]

Dating thread rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Do unto others as you would have them do to you.

And a reminder - you don't know them until you know them!

Link to Info on Dating Websites & Apps www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3514717-List-of-Dating-Site-Info-Dating-Thread?watched=1

Does anyone had that lack of body confidence when considering DTD for the first time.

I hate my stomach, real mummy belly and can't shift it. It's not big, just not toned as I would like and stretch marks. How do you get around it?

I worry that would put him off!

Also interested in the guys take on how they see things like that on a woman.

@ccgirr sods law and he made alternate plans with family after my initial text this morning but we arranged to meet next week and he seems lovely and upftont. My fault but I was feeling so rubbish! Looking forward to next week now

Right I'm off to the supermarket to buy nachos, cheese, salsa, jalapenos and guac for my lunch at work. Was planning on having soup, I blame you lot!!!

@Marlboroandmalbec34 why can't it work with you and MrBig, sorry if you covered this before....

malboro pass the nachos please! As expected Mr Gardener "forgot" about our date today and wants to rearrange.....I don't think so!
Well done lilyrose!

Dancingwithwillard I don't think you are being shallow-of course initially it IS about looks and common interest. I agree with you it is a lie if you put photos that aren't recent - and then he has the nerve to try to make YOU feel bad about it. Unmatch, next!

lilyrose that sounds horrible and disrepectful to you. I think you are right to move on as if he is like this so early on....

@lilyrose88 yeah for me too. But look what you just did! That's bloody great. I left my ex using hypnotherapy. Literally hypnotized myself into doing it because I was so incapable of enforcing my boundaries. Have improved a bit through dating but it's still there. Hence have to be really careful meeting my iron tomorrow. I did previously really like him so it's hard to let it go but if it ain't right...it ain't right

Only skimmed through the last couple of threads, you guys move so fast!
@LilyRose88 well done! Definitely the right decision he sounds like a tosspot
@JoyDiva .... are you a real poster? 🤔
@vwman agree with majority of others, most of what you say sounds like sexist twaddle. Men's egos are no more fragile than womens. Some men seem to think they're entitled to a woman massaging said ego. Unfortunately for them, most of us have better things to do.

Slightly offended I've not had any inappropriate DM's but agree with @CanIreallybebothered in that the posters that ended up together from here (including 'that man' who got a whole host of unnecessary abuse) are 2 of the loveliest people and I too am waiting to buy a hat! They've already got theirs ready for mine The rule was made up to prevent this thread becoming something it wasn't intended to be (another dating site!) and to protect some of the more vulnerable posters from being inappropriately approached by men with yachts 🤨

Anyhoo, I'm off back under my rock now 😬

Sadly my actual lunch is a wilted cheese sandwich

marlboroandmalbec34 why can't the dating work? It sounds like you want more than fwb if him seeing others made you feel bad. I know it can be hard-I just don't worry about what my fwbs get up to (though we do share stories) and just focus on being happy in the 'us' time

lifegoes I have a wobbly mum tum too, I joke that it's my Buddha belly and that I try to rub it for good luck but think it's defective. Injects a bit of humour so I don't feel so self conscious

I am off on the ill-advised running date with Mr Run now-- definitely will be end up red faced and sweaty on this warm day. Let's see how he copes with it!!

To all those who asked why it won’t work with Mr Big. The main issue is we both have kids and our contact patterns only leave us with 1 night a fortnight when we are both childfree. As neither of us is looking to dive into a LTR we wouldn’t want to see each other when have kids. Distance means he cannot pop over when my kids are in bed it would have to be an overnighter and my kids are very unreliable sleepers. Also I fear he is a serial shagger who has been single for a while and enjoys the FAB swingers lifestyle. I suppose we are more fuck buddies than FWB as we have amazing sleepovers once a fortnight and never go out but we play message tennis every evening and have done for over 3 months now and he feels like my friend as we share lots of info.

Putting on another pan of chilli..wasn’t expecting such a rush on!

dancingwith I would kill for a cig..I stopped 6 days ago 😂

@ponyprincess good luck with run, let us know how it goes ...I have a walking date in the morning and must let Mr Pisa know how I get on as he has asked me out again...

that's great malboro I stopped years ago but get sucked back in every now and again if I hang around with smokers. 6 days is awesome, well done.

pony good luck with your running date!

dancingwith thank you.

@lifegoes I've just come back out from under my rock again to answer your mum tum question!
I think it's all about confidence. If it puts anyone off, it's their issue not yours.
I'm a size 12ish, fairly toned arms/ legs and not a bad figure generally but there's a definite wobbly area there. Honestly, I learnt to love it. It's part of me, the result of my children. So what if some bloke doesn't like it? You don't need a mans validation. His ball sack may not be as wrinkle free as you desire but hey ho
It's never been an issue for me when it comes to sex. I am quite confident in bed and the only feedback I've received has always been positive, mainly that my confidence is a big turn on.
Weirdly I don't feel so confident around other women in a bikini with my jiggly bits out as I do naked with a man in bed 🤷🏼‍♀️
Anyway, my point is: love your bits! If he doesn't then find someone who does 😬

Seems like it's just us @LavateLasManos 😂🙈

Thank you @wishywashy6 I am a confident person. I just worry that on the first time it worries me that he'll think wtf 😂. Everything else is toned but that.

Love your perspective 😘

lifegoes I hate my boobs. They were always great but I have breastfed 2 children solidly for over 3 years and only stopped in January . They are no longer boobs but long flaps of skin that I roll into my bra 😂 I hate them but so far no man seems to have been too repulsed.

@Marlboroandmalbec34 I think it's natural as women that we all worry/hate certain parts of our body. I've never once had a guy say he doesn't like my body. But I do worry when it's someone new.

Wonder what the thoughts are of the men on here?

I feel like that about my tummy too (well, about my whole body really) but I figure if a man likes you enough to want to get you into bed, a few stretch marks or a bit of wobble won't put them off.

I've never had a man run away in disgust yet and when I get caught up in the moment I seem to forget about my insecurities anyway and enjoy myself.

We have 'mum tums' because we're mums and we carried and birthed an (sometimes) fed our children. that is something to be proud of, not ashamed.