Dating thread 153- The adventures of... [Title edited at OP's request]

[30somethingandsingle]

Dating thread rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Do unto others as you would have them do to you.

And a reminder - you don't know them until you know them!

Link to Info on Dating Websites & Apps www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3514717-List-of-Dating-Site-Info-Dating-Thread?watched=1

Link to previous thread:
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3543468-dating-thread-152-onwards-and-upwards

@Mythologies woohooooo

What you do on a date is chat. And check out the stubble!

That's all you need to do.

@shitwithsugaron I cannot wait for that day. God knows when it'll happen.

@StarryUnicorn welcome to the thread....

@MrDrummer Virtually every detail of the date would be outing ! It was an unusual one, that's for sure.

@JeSuisPrest oh and thanks too, I'm holding back on the beard pics at the moment as it's a newborn and I'm just getting used to wearing it. At times catch myself in a reflection and think 'Fuck ! Noel Edmonds!'

@Mythologies Brill. You just go along and be yourself. You've led a very interesting life, I'm sure he'd love to know more.

Yes I'm getting overinvested in everyone's dates but then if it works out you'll all disappear from the thread!!!!! Seems to be a lot of success on here currently 👊👊👊👊

As much as I like beards, I am cursing the stubble rash on my chin still! It’s all dry and rough. What if I just can’t be with someone with a beard? 😱

Mythologies yay!! When?? I'm so pleased! And I hope you'll stop yourself thinking the worst 😉.

I went back on tinder. Swiped and swiped, as you do. But I'm way too invested in Mr Guitarist (and I think he knows. Which is weird, as I'm usually so subtle 😉😂). I told him not to replace me before we even met. And he replied 'you don't even care how that sounds 😂😂'.

@HairyArsedMan

Virtually every detail of the date would be outing ! It was an unusual one, that's for sure

Pm's fine :D

Thanks Hairy - I am intrigued - by your date - not by my, as yet non-existent - date.
Miracle I am still thinking the worst - he suggested my area or his (quite near each other) and I suggested a pub about half way between the two.
He has not replied - did he think we were meeting at his place or mine for sex?
Oh well - stop watching this spot people - I am beginning to drone on and on

Ok so I matched with someone on Saturday and it I'm pretty much over investing, I can't help it. Setting myself up for a fall. I'm struggling with accepting that I'm probably one of many irons. I know, I know I should have more potentials too but I really like this one....booooo! What do you do when they're doing and saying all the right things but you suspect they're saying it to others too.
Ugh ugh ugh.

Oh Myth excellent!! Honestly, just be yourself. He will be nervous too ...

Hairy I want to know too, damn it!!

Candace I've only been OLD for a short time, and did the same as you with one of my first matches. Compketely over invested, got on really well, and then met a woman who was significantly older looking than her photos. No physical attraction for me but had a nice lunch and went our seperate ways.
What I'm trying to say is it's normal but don't get your hopes up and try and match with a few others as it stops the tunnel vision focus on one person.

Come on hairyarsedman spill the beans. You're teasing us.

If they offer I tend to do my area for a first date or at least fairly close so it isn't hard to get back. I'm sure he wasn't suggested yours or his place 😂. I would never meet at my house or theirs for a first date as I'm extra cautious when it comes to safety. I also try and get full name, social media (if possible) and phone number. I then send all information, including where we're meeting, to my sister. But, again, I'm extra cautious.

Sorry above was in response to Mythologies.

Hello again, folks. I've been quiet, because I went off Bumble, and the usual happened - once I'm off it, I keep on putting off going back on it- too much to do, etc.etc.

But I got contacted by someone I met on Bumble, and started chatting to on Signal. There's been sporadic contact for 2-3 months, actually, but he's a terrible messager- one word answers, plus he sent lots of selfies and seemed to expect the same, and I hate selfies. Surely the photos on the app are enough?! So, I kind of let it die out a couple of times, and he'd eventually get back to me and say hi, etc.etc......

It did eventually progress to a date, on Saturday night. I wasn't expecting much, to be honest, given the prior communication style. But......I was very wrong. I was absolutely blown away by him. I have genuinely never felt like that for someone before. The conversation was amazing- I felt that I could communicate with him on a level that I can with very few people. Also fancied the pants off him.

I didn't want to push things, so when his parking ticket was about to run out asked him if he wanted to leave, but he suggested we move his car, then sit in it and chat, so we sat there for an hour or so, yakking on....Then we finally said goodbye;- he did say "Let's keep in touch", and I said "Yes, I'd like to see you again", then he looked kind of awkward and went off sharpish. No hugs or kisses or anything . He hasn't been in touch since.

I feel absolutely blown apart. It's like, you steel yourself for meeting the horrible blokes when you're OLD, the "meh" blokes, the "what am I wasting an evening with this one for?" blokes. But.....the one that's the one, but doesn't even see you as a one? That.....I wasn't prepared for

Sorry to hear that crackofdoom That's shit have a or a

Blimey crackofdoom, I'm so sorry, you sound so dejected. Have you messaged him at all since the date?

Oh dear crack that sounds really galling.
Remember you are the prize

mythologies I'm having the latter . After no lunch, because I wasn't hungry. That never happens. I am having a genuine, authentic Jilly Cooper moment, I feel

cassettes are cool No, er, I haven't messaged him....(I know, I know). I'm trying to compile one hilarious, lighthearted, little reminder message, possibly featuring a photo of a little Lego man waving a sign, before I finally retreat into the Bunker of Hopeless Doom and Wallowing.

crack I would definitely message him rather than sit wondering but I like to know where I stand. If it’s not what you want to hear or he doesn’t respond then at least you know. He might be sitting doing the same as you.

Just an idea crackofdoom, maybe he's feeling exactly the same way and hasn't messaged for the same reason? I would definitely message. At least that way you know for sure. I hope you're okay.

@crackofdoom Send the message - you need closure, otherwise, like you say you'll start wondering what's wrong with you, but it's not you and it may not even be him, you just weren't a match. I would have expected a message by now just out of politeness even if it was just saying 'thanks for meeting, had a great time but not feeling any spark, wish you all the best'. It's a shame he hasn't sent it if that's how he feels, so go ahead and send your message then put it to the back of your mind and get swiping. No good ever came of overthinking

@crackofdoom message him. Maybe he's waiting for you. It can't be worse than this. When I started OLD I was the opposite. I was expecting rejection. It was a shocker and upsettingon the first date when I had to do the rejecting. Very firmly too. Neither are great

@HairyArsedMan oh come on. We won't tell anyone 😁

Snap sunshine.