Dating thread 153- The adventures of... [Title edited at OP's request]

[30somethingandsingle]

Dating thread rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Do unto others as you would have them do to you.

And a reminder - you don't know them until you know them!

Link to Info on Dating Websites & Apps www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3514717-List-of-Dating-Site-Info-Dating-Thread?watched=1

Link to previous thread:
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3543468-dating-thread-152-onwards-and-upwards

I was going to say, @shitwithsugaron , sounds like the water is as muddy as ever :(

@BatshitCrazyWoman Wow!! How fantastic!

And also @Sunshineandflipflops also fantastic!

Sounds like there's some serious recovering going on on the thread. Me too. But mr Unsuitable is 15 years younger so I expect that.

@shitwithsugaron I guess that was the friends bit of FWB. 😕

@LilyRose88 I suspect that something along those lines is generally the case with a threesome. Three is after all a crowd !

shitwith grrrr I hate the fab lingo...meet/social/ play 🥴

Excellent news Sunshine!

Wow @BatshitCrazyWoman That's great!
Sounds like the kind of evening/night/morning/afternoon the doctor ordered Sunshine
Just thought I would say that I am so not waiting to see if Mr PoF (yet to be named) messages when he gets back from his day ... like really not ... totally not ...

Good on you mythologies don’t wait 😂

shitwith who is sending who mixed messages?

Good luck with the convo @shitwithsugaron . Definitely communication issues, if you start talking frankly after you parted.

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Hello all, quicke report back on my "3 dates and no kiss" situation...

I was swithering over whether to invite him to mine on Saturday night so that we could get a bit more privacy and hopefully a good snog... but he beat me to it Midweek, he invited me to his to cook dinner for me and maybe go to his local afterwards.

Dinner was lovely, we had some wine and got cosy on the sofa... all good. Lots of chat and chemistry. Ended up having a tour de la chambre and I stayed over.

Brought me coffee in bed this morning and cooked up an amazing breakfast... I like him a lot

Off to catch up with the thread now!

Short one from me:

@MrDrummer Happy to help and have some experience with this.

@shitwithsugaron He sounds fairly embedded in FAB defined boundaries. My feeling is that the enjoyable chat you had at the start is the oxygen you breathe; for him it's throwaway, knockabout stuff. I'm not getting the impression that he is wanting out of FAB and into your life. Should you really have to spell it out to him what you want ? (not rhetorical q) I'm sorry to say this but you would be having more meet ups/dates if this was heading towards something meaningful. References/Biases: Shared an office with a guy like this. Love letters from admirers chucked straight in the bin, but accepted with the utmost of sincerity. Juggling 3 or 4 at a time.

@JeSuisPrest Give over, you have a great personality. This Cornish guy knows his onions.

@BatshitCrazyWoman Awesome turn of events!

Pleased to hear other evenings went well !

Shit I think Hairy is right - he's firmly in the Fab lifestyle/mindset 😕 If you want just FWB then that would be fine, but it doesn't sound like he'll go for an actual exclusive relationship. You may have to say you're looking for more, but wish him well

Hello everyone can I join your thread too please ? I'm 39 been single for a while and decided recently to stick my toe into OLD. Had a few exchanges on Match....mainly with men that appear to have amazing profiles but hide some specific quirks. Only a week in and already feeling disillusioned.
This thread is so helpful to me especially the guidelines at the front. I thought I had a thick skin but OLD is making me question this haha. I also get invested too quick which I need to stop. I need to set clear boundaries. I was thinking no sex before date six or is that unrealistic ? I'd love to have a string of ONS but not sure I'm built that way.

Love hearing all your stories!

@Candace19 Picking an arbitrary number is a strange thing to do. How did you arrive at that number? How would you feel if the guy refused you on date 6, saying he wasn't ready?

shitwith you are not an idiot!!

Yay KhaleesiTargaryen haha love the first kiss and shag was in the same night!

Tinder distance thing has done me in today. Wish no one had told me about it! 🙈😂😂.

@MrDrummer Well done on the weight loss. I lost a large amount of weight but my skin is fairly elastic so you wouldn’t know other than my awful mumtum. I’ve considered surgery but I am trying to persuade myself that it’s only me that has an issue with it.

It sounds like you just think your neck might look fatter rather than is fatter and I have to say I have never, ever looked at a man and thought his neck looks too fat - and even if I did if I liked the rest of him I wouldn’t care. But I can understand why it would bother you because we all have body hangups that other people wouldn’t notice or care about. Stbexh hated his arms because he felt they were too skinny yet before he left me I thought he was the most attractive man ever.

I'm a sex on date no 2 or 3 Candace19 if I like the guy (obviously 😂😂). Why you concerned about when to have sex?

Welcome candace. I think if that's what you want to do,then why not. I'm similar these days,i want an emotional connection first...also less likely they will bugger off (though some still will)

@MrDrummer that's a very good point & one hadnt considered. Unfortunately the men I have spoken to seem to expect to DTD ASAP. Maybe I need to be a bit pickier with who I engage with but they all seem so normal on first inspection. Maybe I'm not as ready as i thought.

@BatshitCrazyWoman wow, that's amazing news!!

@Sunshineandflipflops haha! Sounds very promising. I too have stubble rash right on the tip of my my nose...

@shitwithsugaron that's a bit crap. I've been there with someone who gives you the bare minimum to keep you hanging around and feel like they're almost clock watching. Emotionally draining. Do you think it's time to walk? Doesn't sound like there are any signs it will improve.

So after my lovely evening/morning with the tall, fit, attractive, sporty Mr Fireman I am going to wait for him to make contact first today since dropping me off (he usually does but thats because he wakes up first and sends me a text - Ive never consciously "held out"). I've never DTD with someone so soon and I'm feeling a tiny bit in need of something I can't quite put my finger on.