Dating thread 151: We are the prize...

[30somethingandsingle]

Dating thread rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Do unto others as you would have them do to you.

And a reminder - you don't know them until you know them!

Link to Info on Dating Websites & Apps https://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3514717-List-of-Dating-Site-Info-Dating-Thread?watched=1

I think I should take this one for the team & report back. He's good. Seriously, what could go wrong?

Totally random but MrMusic turned up tonight to tell me he might have an STD. and is being tested. So, we made the most of it and had great sex! I know that might sound very weird to some and I don't care if I get flamed.

leonasa maybe yeah. I don't really want to bring it up tbh. We've only recently had the other chat. If it's innocent it just makes me seem anxiously para.

comedyboobs I bloody love it hahah

So after some advice here I've decided 're Mr old iron who we decided not to see other people and he's live and online still....im gonna give it an expiration date in my head. He's booked a table for dinner next Saturday. If he's still fishing after that I'll decide if I'm just pulling the plug or having a word.

Peanut am 😂😂😂 at Tinder zombies.

Comedy 😂

I've somehow managed to have arranged 3 Fab meets next week - on Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday 😳. Oh and next Sunday. Bloody hell. They are all social meets ...

Meeting Mr Young and Very Keen from Fab tomorrow. Having a wholesome and innocent day out with one of my sons today ... I'm not a complete hussy!!

supercali good idea - once you reach the date you have in your head, will you ask him why he's still online? Or just end it? Gah, this is all so difficult ...

Morning all

Could I please join you? Recently back on the online dating scene. Literally no one else I know IRL is doing the same, and I'm sure my friends think I've lost my mind when I discuss all the crap that I like dating throws into my life! Reading this thread, it feels like I've found my people!

Morning Restless - you're so right, people who've never done OLD before have no idea what it's like! The posters on this thread know exactly how hard it is!

Good morning @Restlessinthenorth and welcome - feel free to jump in with your tales and tell us about your irons/dates you've got lined up.👍

@TooOldForThis67 no flaming from me as long as you're being careful

@ComedyBoobs If you don't get a date arranged with him I'm going to be most disappointed, he sounds aaammmaaazzing 🙈

@BatshitCrazyWoman Sounds like your going to be a busy lady 😉

@Still18atheart is this an iron you're still interested in?

@30somethingandsingle I'm keeping everything crossed for your date with MrFox, you deserve something better than what you've had lately.

My date with MrBanker tonight still appears to be on, but I'll leave shaving my legs until a bit later. I'm not wasting a new razor until I know he's definitely turning up 😂. If he's half as attractive as his photos I think I may end up back at his hotel, he certainly talks the talk, and we seem to have a lot in common inside the bedroom...

Joined the apps (again) and left feeling disappointed and crap about myself (again). I must have the worst luck on these things. Finally matched with a nice looking guy. He actually messages me first (good start). His chat wasn't amazing but he didn't try to turn it to sex (another bonus). Thought it might actually go somewhere....
I messaged yesterday morning 'Happy Friday' to which I got no response until about 9.30pm and all it said was "Yo" (yes this is a 40 yo man). I replied asking what he'd been up to and he sent me 2 messages back but when I tried to read them he had disappeared from the app.
EVERY. SINGLE.TIME

Oh dear @crappyday2018 that's so disheatening. And "Yo"?! Is he a 90s rapper?! Perhaps he'd like to meet my Mr Cuggles. He can't use English either. Sigh.

That would be disheartening....my excuse is not being able to see in these glasses!!

@putastrawunderbaby I know right? I'm annoyed for even responding to that now. I was out with a friend and had a few drinks so wasn't thinking straight. That response was clearly half arsed so I should have taken the hint then. Another one bites the dust.

batshit I don't know honestly. I'm half thinking of going back on the apps myself now. I mean. I could just say 'listen. I'd prefer an open relationship between us 2. What do you think?' Watch him choke on his dinner a bit. Haha. The thing is he could so easily have had a fwb thing with me. I'd have been down for that. Now I'm just in this annoying 'shituation'

Good morning you lovelies, I used to be on these threads years ago but since met someone, got married and popped out a kid. That's now gone tits up so back to dating! So signed up to pof, met Mr Chef and we've been chatting. Have a coffee date on Wednesday to look forward to!

Love how you're all so confident and at Tinder zombies!

Thanks for the warm welcome all!

So am seeing a guy i met from bumble. We are 3 dates in. He is utterly lovely in every way. And extremely fit! I just can't help thinking that he's too good to be true. And a little bit like I'm not good enough for him...and I bloody hate myself for thinking that! I am trying my best not to be a crazy stalker checking his online times and that...but it's bloody hard work. Does everyone else get these weird insecurities that aren't usually there?

I asked him if he was dating other people. He said not. I just somehow don't believe it! Argh.....

No update from me,just wanted to say welcome to the newbies/returners to the thread!

jesuis i am still interested but as seems to be a theme on this thread he is wildly unsuitable. I hope tonight goes well. But I’m with you there’s nothing worse than shaving legs for nothing

Morning All and welcome to the foray kermitrules and restless .

MrMusic left his pants (yes, pants, not boxers) here last night. Is that a red flag?

@Restlessinthenorth It's not just you who does the crazy online checking thing. For me this is the other side of the coin of online dating. One side gives you hundreds of guys to pick from, the other side is they have hundreds of girls to pick from which sends my spidey senses into overdrive.

Try not to overthink things, that way lies madness.

Interestingly though, the guy I am meeting tonight and have been chatting to for a few days has said he would prefer to if we didn't date anyone else whilst we were getting to know each other as he feels things have a better chance of working if all attention is focused in one direction.
Since I've not got any other irons it was fine with me (this time). It would seem guys have insecurities too, perhaps they're just better at voicing them, rather than internalising them like we do?

@JeSuisPrest glad to know I'm not alone! I realise how ridiculous it is to presume that he might not be talking to friends/colleagues/family/mother of his child (as do I, often!) and absolutely has to be talking to another woman. It's crackers, yet it's still my automatic assumption.

Your new guy sounds like he's on the same page tho...sounds promising?!

Regarding last online and still looking.
I don't think it matters if someone you are dating still goes online and reads profiles etc.
You could quite like someone you've met half a dozen times or more. But if you only meet up occasionally that still leaves so much time for boredom to creep in.
If you don't feel the need to be texting iron all the time and being paranoid.
For me I could still meet up with someone but if I'm not getting enough attention then I'll still be going online.
It's an issue if I felt a guy was actively dating another person on the times he was unavailable to meet me!
But just looking is fine.

TooOld what he went home without pants and didn't mention it? Ha. Yeah I think that's weird.

Crappydays completely feel your pain. All the guys I'm talking to are either completely dull or just don't reply. Not sure what I'm doing wrong 🤷.

I only ever hide my profile or just don't log in.
The thought of every so often having to make a new one no thanks.
Plus I hate seeing guys that are on there then disappear then come back after 2 months with slightly different profile.

unique - I've got the same attitude. Jesuis - from what I've heard from irons, they don't have loads to chat to but are more likely to browse just for fun. itsamiracle - it's not you, it's them!

Seriously tho, pants are for boys? What's everyone's view on underwear for guys?