Ending it over porn

[WithAllIntenseAndPurposes]

Repeated denied use that is. He is off work today due to weather conditions (outside worker)
I popped back and found him with his hands down his pants on the sofa watching porn hub.
I've seen his phone history. He's denied it. Wasn't him. Was just looking with his mates at work. Someone sent him a link. He knows how I feel about it yet has managed to make me feel like I'm crazy imagining things etc.
I feel like I need to end things now. Together 20 years next year. The rot has well and truly set in. He makes no effort to look nice does nothing around the house and has zero ambition at all
I just feel like people will think I'm overreacting

If these poetry reading women care so much about sex work why don’t they use their platform to talk about abuse in their industry and do something about that, than trying to prude shame women and men who do give a shit about this abuse. There’s obviously a market for the autonomous, sexy, sex worker who loves her job - she would have more work if other women weren’t being forced to do it too.

I’d quite happily never have sex or a relationship with a man again if the trade off is that to have those things I’d have to accept pornhub in my life. It’s 92 million off my list. No doubt they’re now crying into their kleenex instead of the usual.

Wow I feel sad for you crowdo. Your partner has done a right number on you

Chickenwing.

My DH won't let me do lots of things he considers cheating. The controlling barrrrstard.

I always notice on these threads, that 100's of posters say- porn is normal, not cheating etc, but getting a private dance has 100s of no nos.

It's almost like individual people have different boundaries to what is acceptable to them....

If i don't let my DH have another women's vulva waved in his face, am I controlling then?

Goldenwall

...92 million off my list...

I'll take a copy please. Save an awful lot of time and i can give it to my dds.

I don't have a partner, OP. I live by myself and do whatever I like. But it's interesting to hear that you think one partner must be controlling what the other person thinks.

“Their own sexual autonomy” while flogging their bodies to blokes. Yeah right.
See ? I knew the happy hooker trope would be trotted out.
Pretty Woman and Irma La Douce ?

The Happy Hooker, a poem by a (happy face emoji) hooker
I am a happy hooker, full of gaiety and ....joy.
I love the fact my body is for others to enjoy.
I like all the hotel rooms, I love a mini bar
I love the way the punters bite while ripping off my bra.
I quite liked being choked like that time I was left for dead
(some lovely bloke went mad when I was tethered to a bed).
I like the fact it’s dangerous, we all do love the frisson
Of shagging some old bloke who has just come out of prison.
I like the way they film my arse and put it on youtube
Or tell me not to wince with pain and hand me yet more lube.
It is such a lovely job i want to pass down to my daughters
I like to think they’ll also have such battered nether quarters.
I’ve told them don’t get qualified, instead just earn your crust
Letting lots of lovely of men grind your body into dust.

Smiling face happy tune rectal prolapse.

I find the idea of anyone-but particularly another woman- just not caring about the situation of women in the sex industry deeply depressing. It’s fine not to know-the “women do it because they just love sex” narrative is very strong. But once you do know-how can you ignore it?

It's because again men have told them this. It's harmless and to object otherwise makes you hysterical. Just like with DV over the years. It's normal. All blokes cuff their missus in a row. Don't make a scene you will look hysterical

Every man might now watch porn...

But let's not forget it comes in many forms.... magazines... posters... you'd have to be deaf dumb and blind to have never interacted with pornography 🤣... keep believing those men who "don't watch it".... bullshit!

OP please don't say it's the porn... it might be the final nail in the coffin... but I suspect after 20 years you've just had enough. Just leave.

‘Please don’t say it’s the porn’ boa where is that please coming from? It’s such a strange thing to say.

Maybe many women have had to accept that to have a relationship with a man of their acquaintance they have to have pornhub etc in their lives. Perhaps some women genuinely believe it’s 99% happy sex workers earning a fortune for having fun. Perhaps some women don’t give a shit or actively enjoy watching other women’s pain or rape, who knows. Regardless, although I am an anonymous voice on the internet I’m saying you don’t have to accept it, you don’t have to like it, you don’t have to put up or turn a blind eye or anything else, you can find a partner that does not use porn and you can also live a happy and fulfilled life without a partner if literally every man/woman you meet is stuck in a cycle of never ending wanking in their pants to pornhub on a wet and windy Tuesday afternoon.

'It's in your interests to control the sexual availability of other females to your partner.'

This makes zero sense.

The women on the screen are not available to her partner.
Women in real life might be.

If she wanted to control the sexual availability of other females' to her partner. Then she'd be saying watch as much porn as you like but you're not allowed to be friends with women at work. Or something.

I am also agog at the idea that women's bodies are objectively nicer to look at than men's. That's ridiculous. Have you checked on this 'fact' across lots of gay men and het women? Or have you forgotten about them entirely as per you previous comment that people 'like looking at tits' while they wank.

You're epitomising straight male gaze, it's really bizzare to read.

Of course women's bodies are nicer. Have you seen a great hairy pair of balls?

I like them now. But they're like olives, aren't they? You have to get used to them before you can love them.

What?

You prefer to look at womens bodies and so you extrapolate that to everyone prefers women's bodies.

Surely you can see how ridiculous that is?

Also I find your comment rather fucked up about male bodies.

As a het woman find (some) men's bodies sexually appealing and nice to look at. I do not fancy women so do not enjoy looking at their bodies in the same way.

You think gay men prefer to look at women's bodies?

Do you understand what sexuality is.

Proper bananas.

I think I'm in a better position to judge than you, if you're heterosexual

I've just ended a 20 year relationship because of porn, but the difference is I caught him using gay porn, he says that he would never have done anything physical with another man he just enjoyed watching it, but surely that's not right for a Hetro man , well it's not right in my eyes anyway and he moves out next week, I can't wait, there were lots of other issues anyway but I do think gay porn would have been a deal breaker for me whatever the state of our relationship

Crowdo, you're a lesbian? Do you have gay male friends? Ask them whose bodies they prefer.

Your statement that you are better placed than me to judge whether women's or men's bodies are objectively nicer to look at, because you are sexually attracted to women, is nonsensical.

You're looking really silly tbh

I'm bisexual. So yeah, I think I am in a better position to judge than someone who is heterosexual or gay.

Not that this really is the point of the thread?

Well this just got even weirder

Get sucked in 🤣 oo er Mrs😂

Here we go again. The low bar that some women have never fails to surprise me.

I’ve had partners that don’t watch porn. I’ve had a partner who’s a porn addict. I know how damaging porn can be, and that’s not even getting into the ethical issues involved, and the impact on how men view women.

OP is perfectly entitled to whatever boundaries she wants, and guess what? Men can masturbate without porn! isn’t that amazing? The constant ability to access extremely hardcore porn 24/7 is relatively new - what do people think men did before the internet or before VHS even? How anyone fails to understand the effect of this access is beyond me.

Before the internet, men AND WOMEN masturbated to other forms of pornography. They just didn't talk about it like we do today.

The new porn legislation takes affect from 1st April.

Porn dogs will have to opt in by proving they are over 18.

Don't throw away a marriage over porn. If you tell someone not to watch porn, you are effectively telling them what to do/controlling them. I think that's worse than watching porn.

Jesus fucking Christ. Men must be laughing all the way to pornhub. Epic manipulation to achieve women coming out with utter bullshit like this. Husbands wanking to a woman (usually) being degraded at best, and it’s the wife who has the problem.

I often wonder if people who come out with shit like his have seen what’s on pornhub?

Before the internet, men AND WOMEN masturbated to other forms of pornography. They just didn't talk about it like we do today

Yes, those 70s jazz mags were exactly like the stuff that’s available 24/7 today.

Give me a fucking break.

www.yourbrainonporn.com/miscellaneous-resources/start-here-evolution-has-not-prepared-your-brain-for-todays-porn/

“Before the internet, men AND WOMEN masturbated to other forms of pornography”

Of course they did! They probably masturbated to cave paintings.There just wasn’t a massive amount of freely available video frequently involving trafficked, exploited and coerced women.for what feels like the millionth time, it’s not masturbation we’re talking about-it’s porn.