My husband has just hit me

[namechange101145]

We had a big argument this afternoon, about a non issue, that escalated.
I went into our bedroom for some space, he followed me, I kept asking him to please just go away, he refused and kept shouting. He grabbed my wrists and pinned me down and told me never to tell him to go away in his own home again.
I left to sort my horses out, returned an hour later.
Went into the kitchen and began making dinner, assuming he'd come in and apologise.
He came in screaming at me, calling me every name under the sun. He pretended he hadn't grabbed me and I was being a drama queen. I asked if he'd be ok if BIL did that to SIL (his sister)... "only if she deserved it, like you did."
I told him I was going, ran out to the kitchen to grab my coat and he grabbed me and shoved me. I fell against the fridge and hit my head, he was screaming and swearing at me and calling me a slag.
I ran and jumped into my car.
Currently said in my car by the beach.
I don't know what to do.
He's hit me before, twice, and received counselling for this.
My parents are currently on holiday. I'm 200 miles from my close friends/family.
I can't leave this area due to my horses.
I need to go home and get my stuff. I don't even have my purse.
I'm sat here crying and crying. I just don't know what to do or where to go.

Please listen to everyone. That's not right, you need to get out.

I understand it's not that easy to call the police. But think of it like this just call them to go and help either get your things or remove him from your home so you have a safe place to gather yourself together for now. You don't have to decide whether to pursue charges just yet. Just think about tonight and keeping yourself safe and calming down. Call a friend too or a family member. Or doesn't matter how far away they are you need someone who loves you to support you, even if it is from a distance xxx

Do you know anyone in the area whose house you could go to? I know I wouldn't turn away someone I knew who was in your situation, even if I didn't know them well.

If you don't want to tell them, you can make something up (car broke down etc) just to get you a night away?

Failing that, hospital and / or police if you can manage it.

Plan C - do you know your bank details / have online banking / Apple Pay? Use that to book a night somewhere just to get some breathing space.

When you're calm and ready to process what happened, read these words over and over again:
This was not my fault.
He chose to do this.
His actions are out of my control.
I did not deserve this.

I think you'll find that your post will result in you having all of MN supporting you. Not a single poster believes anything you did makes you stupid or to blame for this. Too many of us have been where you are

A man attacking a woman is simply not on,he needs arresting asap

This is never your fault OP

That whole experience must have been very frightening and upsetting. I'm sorry he did that to you.

You did not deserve it. It was not your fault.

I know you must be feeling very fragile and frightened right now but my love, you are not safe to go home tonight.

Where are your horses? Are they sorted and safe for today?

Keep talking to us, let us help to steady your nerves.

You need to call the police and have him removed from your home, or at the very least be a companies to collect some belongings and your purse.

Is there anyone in real life you can call? A friend? One of your stable mates? Work colleague you know well?

You will be surprised at how many will want to help you if you speak out.

Well you can't go home on your own and you have no money so you either go to the police or go to a friends house. I would advise the police.

Don't be ashamed op. It's amazing what we can justify to ourselves.
Please do call the police and maybe get your head checked out just in case.

Thank you all so much. I've just finished a headspace breathing exercise & feel lots calmer.
I'm going to drive to a&e, my head is really hurting & I know that regardless of what the police do/say, that is likely to be their first suggestion. I will inform the hospital of what has happened & let things go from there.

I am self employed and work from home, and the horses are at a yard I solely rent, so no real friends there. I have a handful of friends through DH but I don't want to go there/speak to them, as that's what he will predict I do.

I really, really appreciate these posts xxxx

Please call the police, OP. They can help you. None of this is your fault. X

That sounds like a sensible idea. It's best to get yourself checked over, and it's good that there will be proof of any injuries just in case too.

Lots of us have gone back (several times). It's incredibly common. But one day we see that life doesn't have to be like this. Please please make today that day for you. Call the police. That's the first step, no need to think any further ahead yet.

Sending love to you. You are not alone and you are loved, we will all listen to you.

Yes, get yourself to A&E and take it from there. You are probably in shock so drive carefully. Tell the hospital exactly what has happened they will help you. Sending strength to you !

You can do this op

A&E and file a report to the police for DV. I hope he is dragged from the house in handcuffs then you can go home. Use everything you can when you divorce the bastard.

Please let us know how you get on at the hospital @namechange101145 xx

Thinking of you, get your injury sorted, then police, then horses. I reckon his friends would be horrified as we are.

Good luck at the hospital op. You're doing the right thing.

Well done OP get yourself to hospital and they'll take care of you. You can do this, you are strong x

This is not your fault in anyway op.
Please do get to the hospital to be checked out x

You have t done anything wrong, the police will help get your stuff

Don't ever ever feel ashamed . Its not you who should feel that

I have been there, OP, he won't change .

You are doing the right thing. You are strong and very brave. There is a way out away from this violent and unsafe man, you will get there, one step at a time xx

You’re doing the right thing. We’re all here if you need support