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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

My husband has just hit me

517 replies

namechange101145 · 10/03/2019 19:09

We had a big argument this afternoon, about a non issue, that escalated.
I went into our bedroom for some space, he followed me, I kept asking him to please just go away, he refused and kept shouting. He grabbed my wrists and pinned me down and told me never to tell him to go away in his own home again.
I left to sort my horses out, returned an hour later.
Went into the kitchen and began making dinner, assuming he'd come in and apologise.
He came in screaming at me, calling me every name under the sun. He pretended he hadn't grabbed me and I was being a drama queen. I asked if he'd be ok if BIL did that to SIL (his sister)... "only if she deserved it, like you did."
I told him I was going, ran out to the kitchen to grab my coat and he grabbed me and shoved me. I fell against the fridge and hit my head, he was screaming and swearing at me and calling me a slag.
I ran and jumped into my car.
Currently said in my car by the beach.
I don't know what to do.
He's hit me before, twice, and received counselling for this.
My parents are currently on holiday. I'm 200 miles from my close friends/family.
I can't leave this area due to my horses.
I need to go home and get my stuff. I don't even have my purse.
I'm sat here crying and crying. I just don't know what to do or where to go.

OP posts:
namechange101145 · 10/03/2019 19:24

Thank you all. I'm just trying to calm myself down & call hysterical. I think I'm in shock. I just feel so stupid to have let this happen to me again.

OP posts:
deadsexy · 10/03/2019 19:24

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

SandunesAndRainclouds · 10/03/2019 19:25

If you are injured, go to A&E to be checked and also call the police. You’ve given him his chances, now give him consequences.

Flowers
kalinkafoxtrot45 · 10/03/2019 19:25

You can do this love. Get the police.

namechange101145 · 10/03/2019 19:26

@FannyFifer I don't think I'm injured, my head is banging but I'm not sure if that is from where I hit it or where I've been crying so much. I just can't stop shaking, I'm trying to just breathe but just keep picturing what happened. I feel so embarrassed and hurt.

OP posts:
Littleraindrop15 · 10/03/2019 19:26

Call the police op

HappyBumbleBee · 10/03/2019 19:26

You have to call the police sweetheart. If he's already had counselling and this has occurred again he NEEDS to be brought back to rakish and realise the seriousness of his behaviour AND the consequences!
You also need someone in your corner right now so please please call them xx

MsSquiz · 10/03/2019 19:27

Please phone the police

HappyBumbleBee · 10/03/2019 19:28

Not rakish = reality

VioletCharlotte · 10/03/2019 19:28

I'm so sorry this has happened to you. Please don't feel ashamed. I've been where you are and do understand why you feel this way, but please, please don't feel any of this is your fault. If you can find the strength, please try and call the Police. They are trained to deal with this type of abuse and will know exactly what to do to help you x

ChrisPrattsFace · 10/03/2019 19:29

Please please PLEASE call the police!
And don’t take him back again, counselling clearly hasn’t worked for him to do this to you again!

Thatnovembernight · 10/03/2019 19:29

Call the police now. You did not allow this to happen again - HE did this. Not you. You gave him a chance before and tried to see if counselling would fix it. It didn’t. The only shame here is his. The only fault here is his. 100%. You cannot risk going back there alone and you can’t spend the night in the car. He is dangerous. Please please call the police. I’m so sorry this has happened. Please remember you did nothing to cause this or deserve it xxx

Mary1935 · 10/03/2019 19:30

Listen he will not stop.

Mummyto2munchkins · 10/03/2019 19:30

Hope you're OK OP, don't feel ashamed. I've been in your situation before. I'm now out of it and have been for 10 years now..
Call the police, they'll meet you and go with you to collect a few things. Be safe. Don't accept apologies.. He will come grovelling back. Xx

Porpoises · 10/03/2019 19:30

You may have concussion if you hit your head hard. Head to a and e, it's still hurting, especially if you feel nauseous or are finding it hard to think straight.

rainbowlou · 10/03/2019 19:30

One of my biggest regrets is not having the guts t call the police..please do it, this will only get worse and you need this on record x

LilyMumsnet · 10/03/2019 19:30

We're so sorry to hear you're going through this, OP.

We hope you don't mind, but when these threads are flagged to us we like to link to our web-guides, which we hope may be helpful. If you'd like to, please do feel free to take a look at our Domestic Violence page.

Very best wishes from all at MNHQ Flowers

MumUnderTheMoon · 10/03/2019 19:31

Call the police to escort you home for your things and tell them what happened. You need to press charges and I know you love your horses but your safety has to be the priority.

MadameJosephine · 10/03/2019 19:31

THIS IS NOT YOUR FAULT!

I’m so sorry this has happened, please don’t feel ashamed, you have done nothing wrong. Wishing you the strength you need to report this to the police and end this dangerous relationship. Stay safe Flowers

historymystery · 10/03/2019 19:31

call the police, they will help and remove him - assault with battery will be taken seriously!

Sally2791 · 10/03/2019 19:31

Call the police. Now. They will support you and help you take the next steps. As someone said, if he kills you, who looks after the horses then. Please call the police

Boxingmum · 10/03/2019 19:32

You need your belongings, call the police they can escort you to get some overnight things at the minimum.
Let us know once you’ve made the call.
Don’t let him get away with this again, call the police

Bigearringsbigsmile · 10/03/2019 19:32

Please sweetheart, call the police. I know it's not easy but you can't carry on like this
They will go with you to the house.

HappyGirl86 · 10/03/2019 19:32

Please ring the police and don't feel ashamed, this is not your fault and you have done nothing wrong.
You could ring the national domestic abuse helpline for advice and support but they will of course suggest ringing the police.
You can do this x

RubyViolet · 10/03/2019 19:32

Please get yourself to A&E and reportthis as domestic violence. Press charges and he will be removed. Good luck ! You can do it !!

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