Dating thread 149 - we live a life of oh wells not what if's

[lifegoes]

Dating thread rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Do unto others as you would have them do to you.

And a reminder - you don't know them until you know them!

Link to Info on Dating Websites & Apps https://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3514717-List-of-Dating-Site-Info-Dating-Thread?watched=1

Thanks myold That's a useful link

Mr S has been messaging a lot tonight. He has been very sweet and then asked for an actual date on Friday. He was/IS supposed to be a FB maybe FwB... I was straight with him and told him I have nothing to 'give' to him at the moment in that respect, he then backed right off and said just as friends and actually the more I think about it the more open I am to maybe seeing how things go, which is a bit alien to me as I was adamant I didn't want anything else, and would have said the same earlier today!

That's useful myold, although I've read elsewhere that Bumble has found a way to stop frequent delete/ rejoiners....

crackofdoom I've redone my Bumble profile loads of times. Never had any issues.
Although I sometimes use fbook and sometimes use my phone number to set up an account.

I will follow your lead then, brain.

I bet that's what helps. Switching between your phone number set up and Facebook

@crackofdoom I've seen this with Bumble and Twitter I think I've just exhausted all the men lol. I get matched on tinder but they don't message I know I could message but if I do if I'm the one who matches if you know what I mean. Obvs on Bumble I do the messages. I was travelling this weekend and go tons of matches while I was away so I'm not sure

I've been chatting with a few guys from Fab one seems really good looking which makes me suspicious 🤣🤣🤣

I've had exactly the same with Bumble! Even if I do get matches - which I don't very much, they never message back. Feels like a waste of time tbh! And I am told my profile is pretty attractive, and I'm not being that fussy anymore even! But hardly anything - maybe I will also delete and restart.. 🤷🏻‍♀️

LNNOhh do you want a man who's a vit of a project?? You did the right thing. First time nerves affecting performance I get, but not anything more than that!

I'm in London and there seem to be never ending streams of men on Tinder 😅 I only go on every now and then to swipe a bit. I'm wondering if it's because a I'm in such a densely populated area??

I have a no makep up, PJs and specs on pic on Tinder. Randomly get compliments on it - some men must love the natural look 😂😂😂

Focus one of my Fab guys is jaw-droppingly gorgeous - go for it!

Batshit - Maybe the PJ's and sexy specs is a bit of an invitation!

Haven't we had loads of feedback from male posters over time that they hate the very glossy profile pics, especially with filters, because they can't really tell what they're looking at? IRL lots of my male friends don't like fakery too. PJs, fluffy hair and a twinkle in the eye are surely more appealing. Mind you, I'm talking men/women in their 50s here - younger men/women may well have a different paradigm. God I'm so glad I'm not young!

TooOld I think 'sexy' is stretching it 😂😂 But they'd know what I look like first thing in the morning 😳

Sorry if this has been asked but is FAB a site for those wanting just FWBs?

Fab is a swinging site, but people also use it for casual no-strings sex.

I've been out for coffee or dinner with more women from Fabs than I've DTD with.

I don't really know what swinging is, but I found that Fab was more open and honest than other sites, and more fun: FB, NSA, ONS, FWBs whatever. Just not long-term relationships, and most 'single' guys on there are married/in a relationship I reckon.

Fab is great if you are careful, use kik or a burner phone for initial conversations (I learnt this the hard way) and prepare to be inundated with 'dick pics' but I've met Mr S there and he seems ok.. I'll know more on Friday

I met one of my FWBs on Fab, a really lovely chap, we have so much fun together. It was easy to tell from first messaging that we would get on, I just think everyone is much more open on Fab - even if being 'open' means exposing your eyes to some things that can't be unseen IYKWIM

What do you with photos on Fab? Do you post ones of yourself?

I'm just cautious of using one of myself. I've already seen about 4 people I know on there.

@lifegoes don't post a face pic public, make it friends only or attach in a message privately. That's what I did as I didn't want to risk people I know seeing me on there.
You can use a fake name too to start with if you wish, it's not a strange thing to do on there.