Dating thread 149 - we live a life of oh wells not what if's

[lifegoes]

Dating thread rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Do unto others as you would have them do to you.

And a reminder - you don't know them until you know them!

Link to Info on Dating Websites & Apps https://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3514717-List-of-Dating-Site-Info-Dating-Thread?watched=1

batshit That happened with me on tinder way back. I think I had to delete the app completely and reinstall

Crying laughing at the thought of a dating spreadsheet. Currently thinking how many columns we could have 😂😂

I paid for silver membership on Fab. And kept notes

Tinder has logged me back in again (weird) - I have 5 super likes from my stay on the coast last night 😂 They're all about 50 miles away!

The messaging system on Fab is awful. It was definitely worth paying the membership fee so I could see the whole message thread.

I met my first date from Fab today - Mr Guitar. He's 10 yrs younger than me and very good looking. So I thought I had no chance. But he's asked to see me again.

I've said yes, of course. But I have a dilemma. I'm also meeting someone else from Fab next week. And date 2 with Mr No Eye Contact at the weekend. Between them and work/life etc, I can't meet Mr Guitar again for about 10 days/2 weeks.

So do I ditch the second Fab bloke and meet Mr Guitar again instead (assuming he's available that day). Or do I make Mr Guitar wait?
This will be my first FWB so I've no idea what's an acceptable time between meets.

myold no harm in seeing both?!

The messaging system on fab is shite, but you can pay £5 via mobile for 30 days I think. But a spreadsheet of doom sounds far more organised.

I've been blocking quite a few persistant ones, the ones who don't understand 'no thank you' & the ones who want to know why I've not replied to their messages.

Oh, and the man who seemed to be obsessed with my feet or any feet really (yes, my feet are on my profile pic if you look hard enough!)
I'm not keen on feet. He was kind enough to show me his hairy trotters. I really, really don't like feet .
At all.

shitwithsugaron that's what I thought - see if Mr Guitar can meet next week and if yes, then make the other one wait.
Hope you manage to make it work with Mr Rugby.

ComedyBoobs yeuck, I don't like feet either. That would put me off completely.

WarIsPeace sounds like that is.good

I am another spreadsheet girl.. Honestly how else can you keep track? 😂

myold i agree with shitwithsugaron!

comedyboob that would put me off!! But another person might go for it

Hi all. So, I haven't let the last batch of flaky time wasters put me off - well I did but my friends talked me out of giving up because of other people's actions (or lack of) - so I unhid my profiles and have been swiping again.

Have chatted with 2 new irons so far. One has already asked for my number and we've moved to WhatsApp and has also asked to call me - which he did this morning for an hour - and has asked me out following our chat. We've arranged a meet on my childfree night Wednesday - now whether he shows 😉🤷‍♀️ I'll call him Mr.I.T

The other I only got chatting with early this morning and he was heading to work. He's younger than me. I'll wait to see whether he comes back later.

Quick question what rules if any do you have with texting?

I'll be honest i never play games with texting but I'm not wanting to sound too keen at the same time

Issue: Mr Fitasfuck

Texting all yesterday got into a bit of sexting all good (he's away on hol rem) he then went quiet for an hour. In the middle of convo Which was fine. But by the time he replied I was out. His reply was sorry, had to go for food. Have a good night chat soon.

I didn't reply as it was late when He replied and a bit miffed he vanished in the middle of sexting

But what's the stance on who texts now (stupid I know) but I don't want to bombard him but I don't want to seem uninterested.

NeverExpected2. Sounds promising with Mr I T! Dinner meet?

Younger can be okay and I would not let that put me off-more depending what you both are wanting

lifegoes I know some people have no double texting etc rules. I tend to just text when I want and not worry

BUT sounds like maybe you are worrried he is distracted by someone else? Vanishing in the midst of sexting would put me off-he could have said he needed to go. i would not like it.

ponyprincess we are meeting in city centre for drinks at a new bar. I'll be miffed if this one stands me up as it's further out for me than the last time I was stood up 😉

lifegoes id be annoyed he'd just disappeared instead of saying but as he messaged to apologise I'd text and give him a chance to redeem himself

Oh and the younger one is actually only 5 years younger but it still feels a lot younger me when he's in 30s and I'm in 40s

Pony I tend to text when I want. I know he's on holiday and I did know he was going out. But just felt random that he disappeared. I don't think he's distracted by anyone else. He's away on holiday and he's text me a lot.

I just haven't text him since his reply last night.

It's just threw me as to if I should text him. Or let him text me now.

Neverexpected I was miffed when I seen his response when I checked my phone. It was even the "chat soon" part. As an end to the conversation.

I think I'm overthink it. But I'm really knew to this OLD and dating in general. So I'm never sure what the protocol is. I do like him, but I refuse to seem too keen.

neverexpected2 hope he shows - his total loss if not!!

5 years is nothing! My Mr Young is a lot younger - we are just fwb tho. I was 5 years with exH and the age difference did not factor in the break up.

You are the prize!

lifegoes if it was me in that situation O would probably text (but I think many others wouldn't!) I would likely text with something that needs a reply.. Or ask if he wants to pick up on the sexting if you want to

Pony as he's away I think I'm going to wait a few days and see if he texts. I need to remember the rules. I'm the prize!! 😉

Hello all

So had 2nd date (dinner) with Mr slightlytooshort. Lovely evening. Lots of chat. Very attracted to him. Great kisser and both confirmed we'd like a third date. Probably at his. My issue is there's not much texting in between and I can't work out if he's not keen/busy (possibly chatting to others) or if he's just not much of a texter 🤷‍♀️.

I've been guilty of over investing too soon previously so I've got a few more irons I'm chatting to. One seems really promising and we're meeting on Thursday. Still only 5'9" though. Where are all the tall men God dammit ?!? It seems all the ones I chat to who are very much my type physically are as dull as hell and the chat just fizzles. I've got another lunch date booked for next Saturday. He seems quite sweet but might be a bit too "nice" and I'm not sure I'm going to fancy him 😬

The spreadsheet made me laugh. I do have notes on my phone for when I'm chatting to more than 4 or 5. Just to avoid confusion 😂

I agree with others re:double texting. I just text when I feel like it really and try not to overthink it 😬 It doesn't always work 🤦‍♀️

lifegoes I think you're overthinking things. He's on holiday. Is it a FWB or potential relationship?
I often disappear mid sexting session, no reflection on my feelings. I get distracted by life, go off & do something else. But I'm not looking for a relationship, & admittedly some guys get a bit pissed off.

Comedy really not sure. He's quite interested in my life and thought I had ghosted him before, which I hadn't. He was asking who I was going out with last night.

I was miffed he just stopped, but understand he's away. That's why I'm just thinking don't text him and see if he gets in touch. If he doesn't then it wasn't meant to be.