Dating thread 149 - we live a life of oh wells not what if's

[lifegoes]

Dating thread rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Do unto others as you would have them do to you.

And a reminder - you don't know them until you know them!

Link to Info on Dating Websites & Apps https://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3514717-List-of-Dating-Site-Info-Dating-Thread?watched=1

And apparently he doesn’t just want sex, he just really enjoys it ( I’m sure that’s what they all say?).

shitwithsugaron I think if he asked to stay in touch knowing you weren't going to be having sex then he genuinely likes you and you should put the feelers out to see if he would like to date. It doesn't have to be FWB or fill commitment, you could just see if he's open to seeing how things go?

Sorry cassettes and pony, I can't explain the not fancying thing. It's never happened before. I don't find him repulsive or anything, but I wouldn't say I find him attractive, but he is definitely sexually appealing. It might be that it doesn't hold up to more than a few encounters,, but for now it is just what I need.

dancing I get what you mean.with mr fab I found that - interesting enough to speak to and clearly intelligent, but in a completely different place from me life wise so no good as relationship material.Didn’t particularly fancy him but he had this ‘manly’ testosterone thing going on that made him attractive enough to me to feel comfortable dtd with.Never had it before but I completely get what you mean.

Yes Coco you put it much better than me. Manly testosterone is a great way to describe it.

Ah coco and dancing I get that manly thing totally now! One of my FWBs doesn't give me the fanny gallops like the other one, but he appeals at some almost primal level, and I think it's just his manliness - he's chunkier and stronger than anyone I've ever been with and DTD I really like that, it turns out. Enjoy!!!

lovemusic it's good to have the conversation but sounds like it has still not reassured you. That in between place can be appealing but leaves a lot of uncertainties. Make sure you know what you want and hold out for that

Welcome pony

Dancing Having a break when you’re starting to feel disillusioned is absolutely the right thing to do. It can be so wearing so it’s a good idea to focus on looking after yourself.

Good luck with your date tonight Notcool and big plus on the already knowing and fancying him!

Love try not to overthink what you’ve said and just enjoy it. Sounds like it’s going well now and I’d be inclined to just go with it.

This afternoon I met a new man, I will call him Mr Martial Arts. He was better looking than I expected and we chatted easily. We were on a circular walk and ended up looping round 3 times and doing a bit of a diversion too as we still had more to talk about. So that was nice

Second date with Mr Giant (he’s 6’5) tomorrow and I feel weird seeing him the day after meeting Mr Martial Arts.

Batshit it helps hearing you and others saying you had to go no contact. I think I have to with Mr TwoYears but hard. He still sent me flowers and and I love you card om Valentine's even though we are 'just friends'

Pony as brutal as NC is it’s definitely the best way to move on IME. Your future self will thank for you it.

MIA12 sounds good with Mr Martial Arts.! If you have not had the exclusive talk with Mr Giant bo need to feel guilty - they are likely all seeing /messaging others too

Thanks MIA12. I am one day in nc

fwb round tonight which will help distract me!!

Honestly you will look back in a few weeks and be glad you did it! Have fun tonight, always handy to have a distraction!

"dancing* i think often we assune some translation between finding attractive and sexual attractiveness but I do get what yiu meab they are nit akways the same. Enjoy if it's fun!

ponyprincess I was in a relationship with someone for a year. Then he suddenly ended it but tried to stay friends with me. I couldn't handle it and ended up sending him quite a nasty message. As a result, he cut contact with me. It was the best thing he could do as I found it hard to do myself.
As others have said NC is the best way to move on.

MIA12 a Mr Martial Arts sounds perfect to me .
I know what you mean, though, about seeing dates on consecutive days. But it may help you choose which one you like best.

Love sounds like you had a good day with Mr SA. Try not to overthink it all. Going with the flow is good. Just make sure you spend time out with him and not just in bed.

shitwithsugaron that's a difficult one with Mr Rugby. He obviously like you. Would you be happy just to see where it leads or do you want more commitment from him?

I've had to hide my profile because I was getting too many tempting offers. Which is a sentence I never thought I'd write.

My first Fab date is tomorrow. Then I have another later in the week. And another has asked when I'm free for a coffee.
I'm hoping one with become a FWB.

Meanwhile Mr No Eye Contact is sending regular, pleasant texts. Not too many but they are a bit dull. I tried a little flirting but I got no response. Second date planned for the end of the week. But if I'm not getting the fizzy knickers by then, he won't get to date 3.

I'm sure some of this chat is similar in approach to me.

Which bits, Suburban?

Just the multiple dating , the way that guys get discussed and talk of binning off , it's interesting

It's just modern life dating I guess. Stranger than back in the day

SurburbanTwist if I decide that any of the ones I'm meeting aren't for me then I'll tell them that. I won't ghost or slowly fade away and hope they get the hint.

A very good approach... just wasn't mine.

I do fear for youngsters in this OLD world